Buzzard Page #2

Synopsis: Bored office employee Marty, is out to cheat the system. One day he decides to make his escape by swiping dozens of undeliverable refund checks from his company. From here, his small-time scams manifest into paranoia and violence.
Genre: Comedy, Drama, Horror
Director(s): Joel Potrykus
Production: Oscilloscope Pictures
  4 wins & 6 nominations.
 
IMDB:
6.4
Metacritic:
77
Rotten Tomatoes:
86%
NOT RATED
Year:
2014
97 min
Website
101 Views


The reason I'm calling is,

you made the check out to Dana.

Wait. What?

I dorft know hovv to do that.

What do you mean?

Just write my name on the back?

All right, Whatever. it's cool.

Yeah, everything's good at vvork. Yeah.

No, ifs, uh-

They even asked me to be manager today.

So that's pretty cool.

Might do that.

No, I- I've been good about it.

Hey.

No.

Hey, Mom, I gotta go. Okay? I got a-

I got a bunch of people Waiting for me.

They're taking me out to dinner tonight, so-

Yeah. Friends.

Yeah, I got, like, 10 of 'em.

Okay, anyway- Yeah.

All right. Later.

Hey, vvhafs up, Zach?

Uh, pretty good

Ah. More returns. All right.

You know it.

Got some weird toner stuff.

Uh-

Ooh. Roller ball.

Hmm.

Stapler.

All right, in-store credit or cash?

Come on, dude.

All right. Cash. Hang on.

Uh, then an

Then-

Looks like an Uh-

No, I bought 'em like two days ago.

Okay.

Wait, wait, wait. I'm sorry.

Is this like a coupon for a free one...

or is this just gonna be 50 cents off?

What-

Oh! Beautiful.

All right, great. Yeah. Thank you.

All right.

- Hey, who you talking to?

- Hey.

- Yeah, no, I'm here.

- He's a liar and a cheater.

Dude!

Yeah, also my mailing address.

Yeah.

Who you talking to?

Okay. That's it?

All right. Thank you.

- What's this?

- All right. Yep.

- What is this, dude?

- Definitely.

Sure.

Yep. Bye.

- Bye.

- What is this?

- Dude!

- What?

- Hey, come on.

- What's this stupid drawing, man?

- What is this thing?

- it's something I'm making, man.

It's the plans.

This is plans for something you're making?

What is it, some Medieval butt-scratcher?

It's a glove.

- A glove?

- Yeah.

- It's actually kind of svveet.

- Yeah.

You're gonna make this?

With those things up there and stuff?

Yeah. They're blades.

Well, this looks like

a third-grader did it, man.

This blueprint- The scale's Way off.

Everything doesrft make sense.

If you Want a sweet blueprint of this...

I got this blueprint software

on my computer.

I'll give it to you for free.

it'll be Way better.

Don't bother, man.

I clon't ever even use my computer.

Yeah, What is that? You're scared of

technology and robots and stuff.

- With good reason.

- Yeah.

Come over to the party zone next week.

I'm getting a new computer installed.

That's gonna be

an awesome situation clown there.

- What is this party zone?

- Party zone-

I'm turning my basement into,

like, a party-zone thing, man.

I've told you about it before.

Hey, come on, man,

that's not your check, dude.

Whoa, vvhoa, Whoa.

That's not your check either.

Well, it vvill be,

if I carft find this persorfs address.

Those are the checks Carol gave you, huh?

It does- You carft just

take someone check and make it yours, man.

- It cloesrTt work like that.

- Yeah, I can.

I will do it- all the Way to the bank.

- To the bank?

- Mm-hmm.

Dude, they're not gonna cash that.

I've worked here

for three months longer than you.

They can see the front and the back

of every one of those checks.

You're gonna get in trouble, dude.

it's not gonna vvork.

I dorft think that's true, man.

I'll ask Carol.

Ask her.

I'm just gonna sign it over to myself.

Hmm. So it'd be like the time

you were at Best Buy...

switching the price tags on the CDs.

Now that was hilarious, man.

This is what this is gonna be like.

- It's not gonna be like that.

- Yeah, its gonna be like that.

No. My mom told me that I just have

to sign the persorfs name-

Whds this? Wayne Needler.

Just write Wayne... Needler.

Pay to the order of...

Martin... Jackitansky.

- That looks stupid.

- Ta-da.

Dude, What are you eating?

Like a Milky Way mini muncher

or something like that.

It's gross, dude. Stand back. Geez.

You're gonna get fired

for that, you know that.

I vvish.

- You wish?

- Mmm.

Dude, this job is awesome, man.

Dude, no, ifs not, man.

We get paid 9.50 an hour? That's bogus.

This crap mortgage company

doing this crap work.

F*** 'em.

Marty, from this job alone

I got like $400 cash at my house.

What do you think about that?

Dude, in this stack alone, 2,000.

Novv that's the real deal.

Doesrft matter. You're not gonna do it.

You're gonna wuss out, as always.

You're not gonna do it.

- Oh, yeah?

- Yeah.

- Yeah?

- Yeah. Not gonna happen.

Check this out.

Done.

You're the wuss.

Well, I'm gonna tell on you, so-

Hey, man, no you're not.

You're not gonna say anything to anybody.

- Okay, okay.

- You got it? Not Kubiak, not anybody.

- You understand?

- Okay. Chill out.

Ivvill strangle you.

Ivvill break your neck and I will kill you.

- You got it?

- Okay! Psycho, man. Relax.

Geez.

- Let's go to Taco Bell.

- F*** Taco Bell.

L- low can I help you'?

I got this check from my mom.

The thing is that

she accidently made it out to my sister...

and I'm not exactly sure hovv this Works...

but she said it's okay

if I just signed my name on the back...

and signed it over to myself,

and I could cash it that Way.

Let's take a look here.

it's has to be a First Federal check.

- Yeah.

- Which it is.

And ifs below vvhafs in your account...

- so we can do that tor you today.

- Oh, great.

- Yeah, it's only like 1 O bucks.

- Yeah.

Is there anything else?

Yeah. Um-

I- I've got a few, uh, extras here...

just like the last one...

Where they're signed over to myself.

So- I mean, it's just-

Let's take a look. Um-

- Right. Well, they're all First Federal.

- Mm-hmm.

And this is below What you have

in your account...

- so vve can do that for you.

- Yeah, they're all small.

And I can get cash back

for those checks right now?

Um, yes.

With checks that are signed over...

you just have to have

enough in your account to cover them...

- and you do, so I can- I can do that for you.

- Cool.

Oh, and, uh, you knovv,

if you're ever in a bind...

the best thing to do is just go to the ATM,

deposit your checks there...

and then you can withdraw 'em instantly.

Really?

Yeah.

Like right there at the ATM

I can just get cash?

Right there at the ATM.

People do it all the time.

Really?

Beautiful.

F***!

You're late again.

Sh*t!

- What? What is it?

- This stupid paper cutter out my hand.

Carol? Carol!

- Carol!

- What? What's wrong?

- The paper cutterjust out Marty hand off.

- What?

- No, it didn't out my hand 0/7?

- Oh, my- Oh, my goodness.

Marty- Oh! Stacy, uh, first aid kit.

Ow. What were you doing?

Carol, ifs broken.

It came right dovvn on my hand.

Marty, you have to be more careful.

Oh, my goodness.

- First aid kit.

- Great. Great.

Okay, you guys, back to vvork.

Let's get to my office.

Did you have your hand right in the middle?

Christopher, Derek, back to work, please.

I'll Wash this out too.

It should come right out, so-

Blood stains, Marty.

Marty,

Here we go.

- Let's get you to Med Tech.

- Okay.

And this vvorft cost anything, right?

No. Of course not.

There you go.

It's gonna leave a little scar,

but it should heal soon. Okay?

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Joel Potrykus

Joel Potrykus is an American film director and screenwriter. His feature film debut Ape won the Best New Director prize at the 2012 Locarno Film Festival, while his follow-up feature Buzzard won the FIPRESCI Prize at the 2014 Ljubljana International Film Festival. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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    "Buzzard" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 22 Dec. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/buzzard_4887>.

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