Camp Dread Page #4

and then it like came

back and smashed her

in the face, it was

f***in' awesome,

you guys see that?

- Never seen it.

- Oh, okay, I'm gonna show you.

Have you seen it?

Oh f***, sh*t, ass.

I don't get any service.

I mean it was like the f***in'

Kenny assassimation, man.

- Assassimation?

- Yeah,

- You said assassimation.

- I know what I said,

sh*t, it was like,

you know?

- Oh, yeah.

- Look, you know what?

We're gonna do a lot of

things just like that,

- I'm just excited, that's all.

- Okay, that's good I'm

glad you're excited.

But hopefully no one

loses their head.

We have lots of

challenges, guys, okay?

You pumped?

- All campers are required

to meet with Rachel Steel

for regular counseling sessions.

- They're watching us now.

- I feel like

something's missing.

- You know,

I didn't put any of my

private sh*t down anywhere.

- Then our folks did when

they threw us under the bus.

- I'm gonna win this thing.

- It's not about winning, Novak.

- Winning is everything,

motherf***er.

- Whoa.

Easy there, hoss.

- One million dollars is

a good start to fixing

a lot of f***ed up sh*t

that happened in our life.

And that halfer fag

almost wrecked it for us

before we even got started.

- And you're the other half?

A**hole!

- There's a pattern

here with us.

- We still don't

know what she did.

I'm talkin' to you scream queen.

- Hey, back off.

- Okay, be the nice guy

but if you wanna win

you're eventually gonna

have to screw her, Matty.

- Alliances between

contestants are permitted

but will eventually

prove useless as there

can only be one winner.

- Thank you.

- Jerry did not wanna come here.

I think it's safe

to say that we all

feel the same way, right?

I mean, we screw up,

our punishment is

a million bucks.

It doesn't add up.

- I had a choice,

this, jail, or rehab.

Now I got a shot

at being a star.

- Gay pornstar.

Maybe.

- I'm sick and tired

of your bullshit.

- Alright, man, come on, man.

Chill out.

- What're you gonna do?

Beat me with your fake leg?

- How'd you like a fake

hand after I break off

the fist you hit with?

- Sh*t, we don't need a killer,

we'll just take each other out.

- What about the princess

of darkness over here?

Look at her.

- You know what I'd do to you

if I were the killer?

I'd knock you out,

tie you down.

- Nice.

- Strip you naked and try

to find that steroid-abused

nub of a dick of yours and shove

a thin, glass rod

right up your pisser.

Then, I jerk you off

with just two fingers,

cause that's all it'll take.

Once you've managed to

get just a little hard

I'd snap it.

Watch you come blood.

- [Katie] Holy sh*t.

- That's what they did

to the douche bag jock

in Summer Camp three.

- You're Columbine's Prom

Queen, you know that?

- I killed my brother.

It was in self defense.

You look like him, Novak.

That's why you're here right?

To f*** with my head?

- I don't know what

you're talkin' about.

- He raped me for over a year.

He forced me not to say

anything, he threatened me,

said it was because he loved me.

Until I couldn't

take it anymore.

So one night, while

he was asleep,

I went into his room and

I stabbed him repeatedly.

After everything he did to me,

my parents still sent me away.

He was their pride and joy,

with a full scholarship to

play football at college.

(eerie music)

They came to see me once.

To tell me about this camp.

They said if I came here,

then I could come home.

I won't go back to Byberry.

So let's just say I have

more of an incentive

to win this thing, Novak.

And I will.

- Yeah, throwin' it down, yeah.

- [Novak] Shut up.

- I know it was you who

f***ed with my digital

photo frame.

Put pictures of me

and my brother on it.

- I didn't go anywhere

near your cabin.

- I don't know how did it,

or why, or if it's all part

of this bullshit game.

- I didn't do sh*t.

- Watch this guy, he

plays dirty folks,

you can't trust him.

- And the fun begins.

(thunder rumbling)

- Hello?

- What are you, blind?

- Ah! What the hell?

- I knocked and called but

you were in the shower.

- So you decided to sit in

the dark and sneak a peak?

Is your camera on?

Hope you enjoyed the show!

Seriously?

- I'm sorry, I didn't

think I would scare you.

- Well you did.

- How did you end up doing this?

- [Katie] I was told I'd be

cut off if I didn't try out.

I never thought I'd get

on, but, when I heard there

was money I didn't fight it.

- I had a choice

between two camps,

this one and one of those

"re-programming" camps

where they think they

can cure homosexuals.

- So, why are you in my cabin?

- Safety in numbers.

You wanna read these

scripts together?

- I wanna go to bed.

- Then let's take

shifts sleeping.

- How do I know

you're not the killer?

(ominous thunder rumbling)

- Hot people are

never the killers.

(soft piano music)

(thunder rumbling)

(knocking)

- [Rachel] Calvin, you okay?

- [Calvin] All day.

- Okay, yeah good.

Whoa!

(upbeat guitar music)

It started out with an ending

Though the ending

took it's time

And all the dreams

we were defending

Weren't ever really mine

Ah, Rosalita.

Let's be through

with all pretending

Guess all grapes

make bitter wine

I'm going where

the road is bending

I'll see you

somewhere down the line

Ah, Rosalita

Ah, Rosalita

- Okay, now it's time for a

little one on one challenge,

okay?

We're gonna do the American

Gladiator challenge.

We have two people,

two sticks right here,

and I'm gonna put

you out on the dock,

I put a little

yellow tape there,

so if you fall over

the yellow tape

or in the water, you're

immediately disqualified.

- I'll take Captain

Hook over here.

- I'll take Novak.

- Oh, good Adrienne, good girl.

- Well I was hoping to get a

shot at the abortion queen,

but the scream queen will do.

- Novak.

(intense orchestral music)

(whistling)

(cheering and clapping)

- [Matty] Come on, Adrienne!

- [Vinny] Alright,

get it, get it.

- [Ming] Too weak, Novak.

(all cheering)

(whistling)

(screaming)

- Novak!

- [Adrienne] No!

- Ah, f***!

F***!

- [Matty] Hey, that's enough!

- Just grow a dick and balls.

- Relax, man, relax,

that's enough.

- I don't play well with others.

- Novak, you were

gonna kill her.

- Well that's what I

wanted you to think.

- Why?

- Because that's what's

expected of me, right?

- I'm the guy out

of his f***ing mind.

And don't let Adrienne fool

you, she's just as much

of an act, I'm on to her.

- What're you talking about?

- Cameras are on me, right?

- Yeah, I mean,

sure, I don't know.

- None of this is real.

Movie star turned therapist,

give me a f***in' break, lady.

Go talk to Adrienne.

- I plan to.

- When I walk of this

thing, I'm gonna be

one million dollars

richer and a star.

She flushed herself

out at the campfire.

- Flushed?

Wait, okay.

Can we start over here?

- I was told there

was gonna be another,

all I had to be was patient.

- Another what?

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