Chastity Bites Page #11

if you know what I mean.

Not really the sorority type, if you know what I mean.

Well, sisterhood can be very

you know what I mean.

Well, sisterhood can be very powerful, my dear.

Well, sisterhood can be very powerful,

my dear. Don't knock it till you've tried

powerful, my dear.

Don't knock it till you've tried it.

Don't knock it till you've tried it.

[Scoffs]

It.

[Scoffs] Don't you like me, leah?

[Scoffs] Don't you like me, leah?

I'm not used to people not

don't you like me, leah?

I'm not used to people not liking me.

I'm not used to people not liking me.

I don't know you well enough

liking me. I don't know you well

enough to feel anything one way or the

I don't know you well enough to

feel anything one way or the other.

To feel anything one way or the other.

Are you sure?

Other. Are you sure?

'Cause you look very familiar to

are you sure?

'Cause you look very familiar to me.

'Cause you look very familiar to me.

Something about the eyes, but I

me. Something about the eyes,

but I can't...

Something about the eyes,

but I can't... Katharine.

Can't... Katharine.

I was just telling your dear

katharine. I was just telling your

dear friend leah how she really ought

I was just telling your dear friend leah how she

really ought to join us for our next meeting.

Friend leah how she really ought to join us for our

next meeting. Perhaps you can change her mind,

to join us for our next meeting.

Perhaps you can change her mind, hmm?

Perhaps you can change her mind, hmm?

You little sneak!

Hmm? You little sneak!

What?!

You little sneak! What?!

You totally went to that

what?!

You totally went to that meeting.

You totally went to that meeting.

So? What?!

Meeting. So? What?!

You know what.

So? What?! You know what.

What happened? Was it stupid?

You know what. What happened?

Was it stupid? Details, please.

What happened? Was it stupid?

Details, please. No, it wasn't stupid.

Details, please. No, it wasn't stupid.

Look, I'm not gonna sit here and

no, it wasn't stupid. Look, I'm not gonna

sit here and tell you if you're just gonna

look, I'm not gonna sit here and tell

you if you're just gonna make fun of it.

Tell you if you're just gonna make fun of it.

Plus anything we say in there is

make fun of it. Plus anything we say in

there is supposed to be confidential.

Plus anything we say in there is

supposed to be confidential. [Scoffs]

Supposed to be confidential.

[Scoffs] Confidential from me?

[Scoffs] Confidential from me?

From everyone.

Confidential from me? From everyone.

Leah, come on. I promised.

From everyone. Leah, come on.

I promised. Well, what is it?

Leah, come on. I promised.

Well, what is it? Like, a.A. For recovering

well, what is it?

Like, a.A. For recovering hussies led by a slightly better

like, a.A. For recovering hussies led

by a slightly better dressed dr. Laura?

Hussies led by a slightly better dressed dr.

Laura? You know what?

Dressed dr. Laura?

You know what? She's really cool.

You know what? She's really cool.

I mean, you definitely misjudge

she's really cool. I mean,

you definitely misjudge her based on some weird first

I mean, you definitely misjudge her

based on some weird first impression.

Her based on some weird first impression.

I mean, she's very elegant and

impression. I mean,

she's very elegant and smart and interesting.

I mean,

she's very elegant and smart and interesting. Hmm.

Smart and interesting. Hmm.

So, is she gonna be your new

hmm.

So, is she gonna be your new best friend you tell all your

so, is she gonna be your new best

friend you tell all your secrets to now?

Best friend you tell all your secrets to now?

Leah, come on.

Secrets to now? Leah, come on.

Well, if you're so in love

leah, come on.

Well, if you're so in love with her --

well, if you're so in love with her -- I didn't say that!

With her -- I didn't say that!

Uh...

I didn't say that!

Uh... Sorry.

Uh... Sorry.

Didn't mean to act like such a

sorry.

Didn't mean to act like such a b*tch.

Didn't mean to act like such a b*tch.

It -- it's okay.

B*tch. It -- it's okay.

I mean, even best friends

it -- it's okay. I mean,

even best friends disagree sometimes, right?

I mean,

even best friends disagree sometimes, right? Right.

Um, I've got to go back to the journalism

room to finish up a layout, so I'll see you

journalism room to finish up a layout,

so I'll see you tomorrow?

Layout, so I'll see you tomorrow?

Okay.

Tomorrow? Okay. You got it,

old buddy, old pal.

Good evening.

I bid you welcome to my humble home.

I bid you welcome to my humble home.

So, who would like to try some

home. So, who would like to try some

of my delicious beauty products?

So, who would like to try some of my delicious

beauty products? Whoa, whoa! Me, me, me!

Of my delicious beauty products?

Whoa, whoa! Me, me, me! [Chuckles]

Whoa, whoa! Me, me, me!

[Chuckles] Now, I must warn you, this

[chuckles] Now, I must warn you,

this treatment I'm about to share

now, I must warn you, this treatment I'm

about to share with you is not exactly legal in

treatment I'm about to share with

you is not exactly legal in this country.

With you is not exactly legal in this country.

I could get into trouble for

this country. I could get into trouble for procuring it,

so I must be able

I could get into trouble for procuring it,

so I must be able to count on your absolute

procuring it, so I must be able to count on

your absolute discretion that you will never

to count on your absolute discretion that

you will never tell another living soul about

discretion that you will never tell

another living soul about this.

Tell another living soul about this.

We swear.

This. We swear.

It stays within this group.

We swear.

It stays within this group. Yeah.

It stays within this group.

Yeah. Good.

Yeah. Good.

Now, take out your mirrors and

good.

Now, take out your mirrors and prepare to be amazed.

Now, take out your mirrors and prepare to be amazed.

[Fingers snap]

Prepare to be amazed. [Fingers snap] Now,

please do not be put off by

[fingers snap] Now,

please do not be put off by the look or smell of it.

Now, please do not be put off by the look or smell of it.

It can be a little strange at

the look or smell of it.

It can be a little strange at first.

It can be a little strange at first.

Just take a little on your

first.

Just take a little on your finger.

Just take a little on your finger.

Dab it on your most hated

finger. Dab it on your most hated wrinkle,

gently massaging it in.

Dab it on your most hated wrinkle,

gently massaging it in. Ooh, it does smell a little

wrinkle, gently massaging it in.

Ooh, it does smell a little funky.

Ooh, it does smell a little funky.

It looks a little bit like

funky.

It looks a little bit like blood.

It looks a little bit like blood.

Yes.

Blood. Yes.

Rub it into those foul lines and

yes.

Rub it into those foul lines and watch them disappear.

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