Clerks Page #10

DANTE:

Go open the sore.

CUT TO:

EXT:
CONVENIENCE STORE. DAY

The IMPATIENT CUSTOMER stops RANDAL.

IMPATIENT CUSTOMER

Hey-did you see a set of keys lying

around here?

RANDAL:

(as Short-round)

No time for love, Doctor Jones!

RANDAL marches off. The IMPATIENT CUSTOMER stares after him.

IMPATIENT CUSTOMER

F***ing kids.

The VERY ANXIOUS CUSTOMER now sits on the ground, next to

the video store door. RANDAL balances his burden and shoves

the key into the lock. The VERY ANXIOUS CUSTOMER stares as

RANDAL enters the store. The door closes behind him, only to

be held ajar in a gentlemanly fashion a few moments later.

RANDAL smiles.

CUT TO:

INT:
CONVENIENCE STORE. DAY

A coffee filter is shoved into the metal pan and someone

heaps ground coffee on it. We've seen this same routine

before. DANTE crosses back to his post, as RANDAL enters,

tossing the key into the air happily and catching it. He

picks the cat up.

RANDAL:

Some guy just came in refusing to

pay late fees. He said the store was

closed for two hours yesterday. I

tore up his membership.

DANTE:

Shocking abuse of authority.

RANDAL:

I'm a firm believer in the philosophy

of a ruling class, especially since

I rule.

(furtively)

Is the Pelican flying?

DANTE:

Don't screw with it. It makes us

look suspicious.

RANDAL:

I can't stand a voyeur. I'll be back.

RANDAL heads toward the walk-in door.

CUT TO:

INT:
BACK ROOM. DAY

POV:
VCR

A far-away wall is the only thing we see, but mild gruntings

give away an ascension of sorts. RANDAL'S head rises into

view, as if he's climbing a ladder. He stops and looks into

the lens.

POV:
RANDAL

The PELICAN is a VCR that's hooked up to a surveillance

camera. It records quickly. A hand reaches into the frame

and shuts it off.

CUT TO:

INT:
CONVENIENCE STORE. DAY

RANDAL pulls a soda from the cooler.

RANDAL:

Want something to drink? I'm buying.

DANTE (O.S.)

No, thanks.

RANDAL:

Who was on your phone this morning

at about two-thirty? I was trying to

call for a half an hour.

DANTE (O.S.)

Why?

RANDAL:

I wanted to use your car.

He walks by a row of snacks and grabs one without looking at

it.

RANDAL:

Snake cake?

DANTE sits in his seat behind the register. RANDAL grabs a

paper and joins him behind the counter.

DANTE:

You don't want to know.

RANDAL:

You called Caitlin again?

DANTE:

She called me.

RANDAL:

Did you tell Veronica?

DANTE:

One fight a day with Veronica is

about all I can stomach, thanks.

RANDAL:

What do you two fight about?

DANTE:

I guess it's not really fighting.

She just wants me to leave here, go

back to school, get some direction.

RANDAL:

(opening paper)

I'll bet the most frequent topic of

arguments is Caitlin Bree.

DANTE:

You win.

RANDAL:

I'm going to offer you some advice,

my friend:
let the past be the past.

Forget Caitlin Bree. You've been

with Veronica for how long now?

DANTE:

Seven months.

RANDAL:

Chick's nuts about you. How long did

you date Caitlin?

DANTE:

Five years.

RANDAL:

Chick only made you nuts. She cheated

on you how many times?

DANTE:

Eight and a half.

RANDAL:

(looks up from paper)

Eight and a half?

DANTE:

Party at John K's-senior year. I get

blitzed and pass out in his bedroom.

Caitlin comes in and dives all over

me.

RANDAL:

That's cheating?

DANTE:

In the middle of it, she calls me

Brad.

RANDAL:

She called you Brad?

DANTE:

She called me Brad.

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