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No more arguing.

You're right. I'm wrong. All the time.

You want a kiss?

- I'll take a kiss.

- I can't. If I give you a kiss...

...it might lead to something else,

then... three minutes goes by.

You're laying there disappointed,

I'm smiling.

I wanna be with you every minute

of my life, that's why I gotta leave now.

Have a great day!

Once again, Michael left Donna

in bed confused and unsatisfied.

Shut up, James Earl Jones!

No, you shut up, big mouth!

Michael!

Mr. Ammer is here

Your first day as a partner, you come

to work in a fricking bathrobe?

I did. I did.

John, I just feel we should

stop wasting our energy...

...on corporate brown-nosing and

worrying who's got the better suit.

Armani, Calvin Klein, who cares?

Let's concentrate

on what really matters, the work.

That's the craziest thing

I've ever heard.

But goddamn it, you're right.

Life-changing. I feel freer.

Yeah... Keep the pants on.

Sexual harassment, eh?

Speaking of life-changing...

...there's something, or actually

someone, I'd like to talk to you about.

- Janine.

- Everything okay?

Michael, Janine and I decided

to drop out of the rat race...

...slow down, move to Morocco.

- Morocco?

- Morocco.

Okay.

Eric Lamensoff will assume

my day-to-day responsibilities...

...and I'd like you to take his job.

But Eric Lamensoff is the head

of the whole international division.

- I've been your partner one day.

- So?

Every account you worked on

turned into gold.

You know, I wouldn't be surprised...

...if one day you ended up

being our CEO.

Hey, I would love

for that to happen, but...

No! No, no, no!

I don't want a promotion!

No!

Michael, you have a phone call.

Michael Newman.

Word up, big guy.

Ten years ago you told me

you wanted to be CEO.

Great news.

Eric Lamensoff killed himself.

So you better stop with the junk food,

Mr. Chairman...

... or you'll end up

killing yourself too.

Opening virtual blinds.

Ten years?

How much worse can things get?

Oh, my God, I'm a fat guy!

Look at me.

What is this? This is titties.

I got juicy titties!

What... What is that?

Oh, God, no.

Just take me home.

This is 1010 WINS news.

February 5th, 2017.

Britney Spears

had her 23rd baby today.

Proud father Kevin Federline says

he's now considering getting a job.

Also, Michael Jackson,

the first man to clone himself...

... is now suing himself

for molesting himself.

Donna!

Donna!

Can I help you?

- Hey, Dad.

- "Hey, Dad"?

Ben? That's you?

Look how big you got.

You're enormous.

Look who's talking, Captain Twinkie

of the S.S. Fat-Ass!

Really good for my self-esteem.

Maybe if you would take me

to Pilates like you said...

...people wouldn't think

I was Rosie O'Donnell!

Come on, I love you!

- Bring me back the Twinkies!

- You're so cruel!

Will you please stop yelling?

It is so embarrassing.

- Is that my daughter?

- Mom, I'm going to Derek's!

That's you, Samantha?

When did you get b*obs?

The same time you did, Dad.

Now can I go?

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Who the hell's this Derek guy?

My boyfriend, the hottest boy

in school, hello?

He's gonna be hot

when I burn his house down.

Get your ass upstairs,

put normal clothes on.

- Why are you so mean to me?

- Get them on now!

- And wipe off all that makeup!

- Right!

Is Peanut dead too?

This one's got the duck

doing all the work.

Donna. Donna.

Goddamn it.

Look how gorgeous you look.

I'm so scared.

- Knock, knock, gang.

- Hey, sweetie.

What's going on?

Donna and I were gonna get

hot chocolate.

- You want us to bring you one?

- You cheating on me?

With Johnny G-String over here?

Come on. Time-out.

I thought we were past that.

No, no, no, we're past this argument.

No, you're right, no big deal.

Hey, it's just that you don't

mess with another man's wife!

Michael! Stop it! Stop it, Michael!

It was your decision to move out!

So stay out!

Get off me!

You sticking up for him?

Go away! Go away, I hate you!

- We can't argue! Donna, please!

- I hate you! I hate you!

Oh, man!

You hate me?

No. No.

Ten years, you're not finished yet?

Morty! Why did you do this to me?

You did this to yourself, Michael.

No. No, I didn't wanna

waste all that time.

I didn't wanna lose Donna!

The remote goes by your behaviour.

Every time you had a conflict

between work and home, work won.

- No, not true.

- Lie to your wife.

Lie to yourself.

But you cannot lie to the remote.

The remote is lie-proof, so you can't

change what already happened.

But you're still a young man.

A young, fat man.

You could win Donna back.

So that's what I'll do.

Go for it, tubs.

I saw what you did to the duck.

Very good. Nice work.

You'll feel that in a second.

All right, please,

please just read my note.

- Hate you! I hate you! I hate you!

Oh, my nuts!

Michael, are you awake?

Michael, honey. Are you awake?

Donna.

Where'd all my fat go?

It was just a dream?

A terrible, terrible dream.

What's that, Michael?

You had a bad dream?

Did a fuzzy dog push me over?

Oh, Shaggy the miracle dog?

Yeah, if he hadn't knocked you

on your noggin...

...you wouldn't have had the CAT scan

that found the cancer before it spread.

I have cancer?

No, you had cancer.

You're the only person

to gain weight during chemo.

That's probably what caused

your heart attack.

Heart attack?

I thought they weaned you

off the morphine.

Okay, Mr. Junk Food...

...since the injury,

you haven't been healthy a full day.

When exactly did I hurt my head?

When was it? Like, six years ago?

Six more years! No! No!

It skipped all my sickness.

I'm gonna ask them

to cut back on painkillers.

Donna, don't go.

What's this?

That's not bad

for your third liposuction.

One more tummy tuck

should take care of it.

Oh, it looks like a tongue...

...licking.

Look, I should go.

Bill's waiting for me downstairs.

- So I'll probably...

- Bill?

You're still with Speedo Torpedo?

Whatever happened

to "forever and ever," honey?

"Forever and ever"?

Look, Michael, I'm trying to have

a civilized relationship with you...

...for the kids' sake.

I really wanna be friends,

but I can't do that if you...

Would you stop flapping that thing?

It's my flap, I'll do

whatever the hell I want with it!

You done?

Look, Bill's my husband.

Please learn to accept that.

I really have to go.

Husband? Donna?

No. Donna. Donna. Donna!

Welcome to Newman Architecture.

Building a better world for all of us.

Architect of the year, 2018.

All your dreams came true,

huh, moron?

Dad. Hey, how you feeling?

- Benjamin. Look at that.

- Look... What?

Your face. Your skinny face.

You're shaving now, huh, kid?

Your entire ass is gone.

What happened? Good for you.

Right, my ass. Why don't

we talk about it in my office.

My old office.

The architect. How did this happen?

- Mom said you were still a little loopy.

- No, no, no. I'm feeling terrific.

The weight. How did you do it?

Staple treatment like your old man?

Wanna have a flap fight?

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