Clinger Page #5

Get ready.

Is Laura Kura.

Running for Tammel Price

High is Eric Lieberman.

Representing Patrick Moore

High is school record holder

Fern Peterson.

Runners to your marks!

That is Fern Petersen

of Patrick Moore High,

neck and neck for the lead.

That's Fern Petersen in

the lead and she's carrying

a water gun.

Ya!

Fern Petersen has tripped.

What is Fern Petersen doing?

Lacey Jackson of Spring

Tree High wins first place.

First Battalion, assemble!

Take it in the

mouth and swallow.

Kelsey, crowd control.

Sh*t.

Okay, people,

nothin' to see here,

just a group of people

puttin' on a show,

an innocent, little

show.

Rushing the field

is not permitted.

Please stay in your seats.

Eskimo!

Fern, I love you.

What you're

seeing is a-a play.

Very experimental piece.

Very avant-garde.

Fern's my best friend.

I have to go help her.

She's such a good person.

Best friend, I'm

coming for you.

No, no, no!

No, you dumb ho, get

back here!

Best friend,

what are you doing?

My God!

Jenny!

Where's your hand?

That was

someone call 911, actually,

'cause that was real.

Love always prevails.

Back away from Fern!

I'm back, mother f***ers.

Hogwash!

Back off!

Why don't you love me?

Thanks.

No problem.

Do it now, Fern!

Robert, I don't love you.

What?

I don't love you.

I don't love you.

I don't love you.

Stop.

I don't love you.

I don't love you.

Stop.

I don't love you.

This is all perfectly explicable

by the rules of science.

I did this for you, Fern.

We could've been perfect.

Relationships

are never perfect.

You were my first love, Robert.

But people change and maybe we

could've been happy together,

but that's not what

happened.

I'll be all alone up there.

No, you won't.

You could woo Joan of Arc,

you could date Amelia Earhart.

There's someone up there

for you, but it's not me.

And you have to let go, Robert.

Fern, I'm sorry...

for everything.

When you remember me,

can you try to remember

the good times?

Whenever you can?

If you can?

Thank you, everyone,

and goodnight.

The track meet

has been canceled

due to unexpected

cosmic activity.

Can someone get my legs?

Have a lovely evening.

Thank you for coming.

And we'll call it the

Jenny Bernstein Memorial

Foundation for Behanded Youth.

Suck a dick, Georgia.

That was nuts.

Jenny got her hand cut off

and-and what-what

was that in the sky?

It was a portal from

another dimension.

Cool, yeah, okay.

Hey, dude, Fern?

She wants your D.

-Thanks, Marcus.

-Yeah, you're good, you're good.

All right, cool.

Well, I'm just gonna to stretch

'cause, you know, game day.

Sh*t.

Fern Petersen?

I'm Abigail Hillstone,

recruiter for MIT.

Hi, I'm sorry...

Take this.

That's my husband's card.

He's a psychiatrist.

I'm sure he can help

you and your friends.

Fern, are you okay?

Yeah.

And I got a contact, sort of.

Let's get the

f*** out of here.

You did good, kid.

Sorry about MIT.

Side hug.

You have blood all over you.

Shut up.

See you at practice.

Gross.

I'm damn proud of you,

Kelsey.

Thanks, Dad.

I'm Fern.

Honey, I think you

have a concussion.

And I'm proud of you too,

Fern.

Thanks, Dad.

Mom?

I'm drivin'.

I'll catch up with

you guys in a second.

So, I was,

wondering if,

maybe you would like to

next weekend go for

dinner or something?

I thought you were

done with relationships.

I was.

Actually, I think I

want to stay single,

like, for a while.

Yeah, that makes sense.

But we can still stay friends

and for right now, just chill.

I mean, you think

that's gonna work out?

I have no idea.

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