Club Paradise Page #7

- Is that music?

- Yeah.

That's a blender.

- Civilization. Let's go!

- We're saved!

- Come on!

- Oh, God!

Hello.

- We've been in the woods, so the leaf.

- Hey, gorgeous.

Look at this. We walk into the Taj Mahal,

and I'm wearing a towel.

This is completely humiliating.

And I am wearing a leaf!

- Any luck?

- No, not a trace.

They finally called off the search.

Five miles out,

I thought I saw a shark flossing.

Anything I can do to help?

Yeah. You ever heard

of a Chinese basket job?

No, but it sounds like fun.

Philadelphia,

I should have taken your advice.

I'm not cut out for this.

Why don't I just sell to Gundy

and get the hell out of here?

You can't give up now.

You've worked hard for this.

What would happen to Ernest

if you leave? He needs you.

You can't lie on the beach all day

and pretend nothing's wrong.

"No man is an island," Jack.

What the hell does that mean?

No man is a woman, either. God.

Hello?

Really?

- They're safe.

- Great.

They found the others

at the Royal Saint Nicholas.

We'll be right there. Thank you.

All right, ladies,

let's hit the blackjack tables.

- I think we'll have a drink first.

- Yeah, you guys go ahead and go.

- All right. Let's party.

- Okay.

Thank you.

- Well, I guess my luck has changed, huh?

- I don't think so.

Hey, pal, where the hell did you go?

I was about to send your name to Ripley's.

Yeah, well, somebody stole our clothes.

And then Albert Schweitzer

over there panicked...

and we ended up taking a shortcut

through the suburbs.

I'm telling you, it was fruit city out there.

The bus leaves in five minutes, be on it...

or I'm sending those pictures

of you eating pork.

Gather the rest of our flock.

I'll round up the strays.

Okay, come on.

Come on, baby. Kiss it.

Come on. Mama feels good tonight.

- Number!

- Shoot, crap two. Line away.

Honey, that's over $1,000 already.

Don't you think it's time to quit?

Randy, I want to get to a place

where I don't care about money.

And I want you to get there with me.

Come on, red devil! Yeah!

Two crap two. Line away.

- Open up a line of credit.

- No! That's it. No more.

You gonna quit while you're down?

I thought you were a plastic surgeon.

You shave a couple of schnozzes,

and you can retire for life.

Listen, Doc. Let her have some fun.

The thing you do with women is...

buy them anything they want,

agree with whatever they say...

make them happy,

and jump them when they're not looking.

And you call that a philosophy?

How you doing tonight?

Looks like lady luck took a hike on you.

You ready to go home?

No, we've decided to stay here

for the rest of the week.

- You'll be paying for it the rest of your life.

- Honey, could you get me $1,000 in chips?

That's it. I think you're having

too much fun. Come on.

- So, the fireman.

- So, the middleman.

- How you doing?

- Not so good.

What a business, huh?

People are a pain in the ass.

People are all right.

It's the business I can't stand.

You look like a smart guy.

I don't know why you're knocking your

brains out in a sh*t hole like that, anyway.

Why don't you let somebody

put up a real hotel there?

- Like you?

- Could be.

I'd see to it that you got out of here safe

with a little money in your pocket besides.

What do you think?

- Hit me.

- Gonna hit an 18?

Twenty-one.

You're a little crazy. I like that.

- Keep playing.

- No, thanks.

Crazy, but I'm not stupid.

Thanks for the offer.

You're fired. Your luck is rotten.

- I'm fired?

- Nah, wait.

- Not your fault. You're not fired.

- Thank you, sir.

Now you're fired! Get out of here.

Can I get you a drink

while you're waiting for a new dealer?

Would you excuse me for one second?

- Can you do me a really big favor?

- No.

I got two chicks lined up over there

that are hot to trot.

I can't find my friend Barry anywhere.

I don't know where the hell he is.

- Can you join us?

- Are you insane? I'm a married man.

Yeah, nice marriage.

You just have to talk to them.

You just have to be nice. They love me.

We're in, I'm telling you.

We'll dance, have the time of our lives.

I'll go back to my room.

I'll get some weed.

Do you know what I'm saying?

This is the night. Okay?

Just go over and keep them occupied

for a couple of minutes. Go, go, go!

I'll be right back.

Barry!

Who's there? All right.

What the hell is this?

Oh, my God.

We scored!

We scored!

The score of the century!

There's so much.

There's too much.

This is the wrong bag. This is...

This is a mistake. This is...

It's gonna take 20 years

to smoke this stuff.

I'm gonna get 20 years for this.

That's what's gonna happen.

Twenty years for a mistake.

Please. Yes, I'll hold.

- Anything?

- It's a long shot, but I'm trying.

Mr. Gundy.

I'll say this for you, you're prompt.

When you threaten somebody...

- You're right on time.

- Enough insults.

You have had more than enough time

to consider my offer.

Now I want an answer.

Are you ready to sell?

To tell you the truth,

it wasn't much of an offer.

Besides, we've been so damn busy today,

we haven't had a chance to think about it.

We'll need more time on this,

like maybe a year.

No.

Your time has come.

- Take them!

- Take them.

Let's go. Let's go.

No problem, I will talk to them.

I will reason with them.

They've got guns.

They do have guns. I love you.

Pardon me. Mr. Reed,

we have a conference with you outside.

After him!

- This way, this way.

- Here!

Jack!

Do you believe this?

This is nice. Kind of a harvest motif.

You better get out of here, Jack.

What are you gonna do?

- I've got friends here, they'll help me.

- Help you what?

There's a sickness in this place,

and I'm the doctor. It's time to operate.

Oh, no. You're not going anywhere.

Out of my way, Jack.

I don't want to hurt you.

- Good luck.

- Just cool, Jack.

"Just cool, Jack."

Sure, go start a revolution!

It's not going to look good

on your rsum, you know!

God damn it!

You hear me? We're finished as partners!

I'm going back to Chicago where it's safe.

Help! Help!

Anybody, help me!

Gentlemen, I just spoke

to the owner of Club Paradise...

and believe me, he is dying to sell.

We were expecting signed documents

this morning.

Let's face it, Heinz,

we're not in Switzerland.

With all due respects

to the Prime Minister...

you can't even get

a piece of carbon paper here...

that hasn't been used 100 times already.

But we are close. We're very, very close.

- Oh, very, very close.

- Excellent.

Now, if you will excuse me...

I know you have urgent business,

Mr. Gundy, but before you go...

I have a little surprise for you.

Because you have been so cooperative...

we have taken the liberty

of designing a new residence for you...

to be built

in the first phase of construction.

Incredible! The guy's got a heart

like Dumbo.

Dumbo the elephant, with the big ears.

Like him. Not the ears, the heart.

Forget it. Sol, let me walk you out.

I thank you.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes