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Coffee Town Page #5
thought it would be okay
Lord of the Rings exploded
in it.
- Hey! Can you cook game in
this fireplace?
- But it was starting to
feel like everything was
slipping away.
Like all my years of
responsible living
neck.
- Join me!
- And you wanna do
something dramatic...
...and Elvis-y...
like shooting out your
T.V. screen.
But... you settle for
something far less cool.
Like... turkey Lunchables.
- Hey Will.
- What the f***!
What the f***?
- I told you... I don't
sleep.
- Ugh!
Then... you decide to do
something to change it.
-Hey...
What's with all the medicine?
- Oh! ... I have AIDS.
Yeah... I hope that's cool.
Oh! Aw sh*t, that's gonna
bleed.
- You can keep it.
- And when it works... You
don't wanna stop.
I'm gonna rob this place.
- What?
- If I created a crime
that scared the executives
away
from converting this store...
I'm gonna plan a robbery.
- Hey. Are you serious? I'm a
cop!
If anyone's gonna plan a
robbery it should be me.
I have studied this sh*t.
- Okay.
- Alright, but I only wanna
cause a crime.
I don't wanna take any money
- I am in...
But let's take some money.
- Then we're literally
robbing it...
- We'll just take a little.
- Still robbing.
- You're right. We'll just
take some merchandise and
sh*t.
I have had my eyes on one of
those hoodies.
- Do you know what robbing
is?
- Yeah! Charging 35 dollars
for a hoodie.
- I'm gonna tell you your
bat,
this place is all glass. It's
like we're in a fishbowl,
and there's constant traffic
on that street.
- Okay, true.
- So let's brainstorm about
that tonight.
We'll have our first planning
session tomorrow.
- Okay, where are we gonna
go?
- Here...
- You son of a b*tch
- We're planning
inside Coffee Town.
- This is my office.
- Tomorrow.
- Okay.
Time to smoke.
- What's that do?
- I dunno.
- Yes, yes, yes... yes, yes.
- Hey.
I, uh, I forgot to give this
back to you yesterday.
- Oh! Wow, I didn't even
realize.
- You didn't?
- No... no, I did... I lied
just then.
I don't know why.
- Okay.
Well, um...
Thanks again.
- No, thank you
- Okay.
- No, thank you!?
You're trying to bone her,
not get her to join your youth
group.
- Why did you shove me?
You threw me off!
- You gotta get in her space,
threaten her a little bit.
Do you know anything about
women?
- Apparently not is right.
I'm sorry I yelled.
Listen... When she's done
ordering,
there, totally bored.
That's when you go up and you
ask her out.
- Okay.
- Okay.
- That sounds doable.
- Yeah, it's good.
But don't stare at her. Now
you look like a serial killer.
-R- right.
- And don't look in my eyes.
Why would you do that?
That's so weird.
-What do... What am I
supposed to--
- What you normally do.
Look at your computer.
Open your computer.
- Open the computer.
- Why would you look at a
closed computer?
- You don't mind if I smoke,
do you?
- No.
Newports, huh?
- Mm hmm.
Menthol.
insides black.
Blacky black black.
It's worth it, though...
...don't have to work as
hard.
You know this used to be
Brown Town.
- Okay okay okay, now's your
time. Ready?
- Now?
- Go get her, this is big.
Go baby, you got this. Go get
her.
- Okay...
- Okay.
- Hello again.
- Hey.
- Hey. Uuh... So, I was just
wondering...
- Sorry, I forgot, did you
want, uh, whipped cream?
- Yeah, sure, thanks.
- There you go.
- Wow... thank you.
- Hey, before I forget, um,
my band and I are playing at
the Vanguard tonight,
and it is going to rock.
- Yeah, I'm gonna be there.
college friends.
- Nice!
- you know, you guys don't
freak out or anything, but...
... I may dedicate a song to
you tonight.
- Oh!
The way a little
kitten purrs
that's the way my
passion stirs
stirs for you, stirs
for me, that's all that I
can--
No?
- Uh...
Stirs my soul
as far as I can see
Stir. It's track three. It's
from the... it's... I gave it
to you.
- Ah... Right.
- You may not have heard-
maybe you didn't hear it yet.
- Not yet.
- It's alright.
You will, I mean- hopefully,
maybe.
That was just a little
amuse-bouche to the main
course later.
- Alright.
I'm sorry, what were you
saying?
- Was I... say- ...
Oh... No, no no no no... No.
- You know, I... I have to
go.
- Yeah!
- Alright.
- I was just gettin' a straw.
- What'd she say?
- You got up from our table?
- Yeah.
- Mother f***er!
It's amazing how much
disdain you can have
tables
when your intention is to
do the same.
And since the outside
tables smell like Chad's
cigarettes,
the couch is the only
remaining option.
The problem with that is
by some type of car
engine,
burning the ever-loving
hell out of my lap.
- Did you see the newspaper?
- Nope.
- Get on the ground and put
your hands on your head
or I'll shoot you in your
face, mother f***er!
- Hey.
- Hey.
- I'm not talking to you on
that thing.
- C'mon man it's like you're
talking to lightning mcqueen.
police car.
- Are you sure? Which one was
the police car?
- I don't know.
- Neither do I. All I
remember
is that hillbilly tow truck
with the f***ed up teeth.
And he'd be like "hey y'all!"
- Hey, I'm gonna go.
- No no no, stop.
- C'mon, man.
- Stop.
Look at me...
Where ya headed?
- I'm gonna go home, I'm
gonna eat some hot pockets,
six-pack of beer.
- You're not gonna do that,
okay?
Cuz we're going to the
Vanguard.
- What?
- Yeah, Sam might be in a
band, who cares?
He's on stage, you're not,
giving you full access to
Becca.
And you can draft off the
very horniness his rock 'n' roll
creates.
Ride that airstream, just
slingshot by!
Right up into her cooch...
and stay there.
- You think?
- I never lie when I'm on
duty.
Alright? Pick up those beers,
we'll bang em off in the car.
Ready?
- Okay.
You know you hit that wall,
right?
- Let's move it! Let's Go!
- There's something about
being in a rock band...
It doesn't matter how good
the music sounds...
You still look like a
total p*ssy playing the piano.
- Ladies and gentlemen!
Clap your hands for Mr. and
Mrs. Williams!
- Whoa... there she is.
- Where is this?
Woof!
- Hehe, woof.
Why is she talking to that
guy?
- It's perfect.
Get ready to bat some
cleanup.
- What?
- I dunno, it sounded like
something.
- There's some old
baseball a--
- I just went for it, who
cares,
I made a mistake. Go go go
go! Go go go.
Hey.
- Hey.
- Hey, stop it.
Let me get you a drink.
- Sure!
- Yeah?
Alright. Let me get a rum and
diet coke for the lady.
- Gino's move when he's
not in uniform...
subtly lower the girl's
self esteem to make her an
easier target.
- Do you want me to get you a
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"Coffee Town" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 29 Aug. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/coffee_town_5728>.
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