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Comic Book Villains Page #5
- R
- Year:
- 2002
- 92 min
- 89 Views
anymore.
Buy or read.
Why's that?
I don't know.
Um, just lately I've
been sorta thinking
that comics aren't
the real world.
Like last night,
I had on CNN for a while
instead of
the cartoon network.
Instead of
the cartoon network.
I know that sounds stupid.
Comics aren't
the real world?
Now, that's
dangerous talk.
That's a nice photo.
That's me
and my husband.
We were
on our honeymoon.
Spain, in '48.
God, perfect!
Right after
world war ii.
'48. Wow.
Why, you interested?
You're not just
giving me lip service
like Norman, right?
No, I'm interested.
Do you drink tea?
Yeah, actually, I do.
You remind me so much
of my husband.
Really?
No, of course not.
No, I guess not.
But you--you have
this real pale skin.
It's--yeah, so does
half of Sweden.
It's--yeah, so does
half of Sweden.
Um, so Spain,
was it nice?
Mmm. It was
the only time
that I ever
left America.
It was--
it was perfect.
It was perfect.
Yeah. And she told me
about how her
and her husband
went on a trip
there once
and spent 2 weeks
traveling around.
He even ran
with the bulls
in Pamplona.
Paloma.
What?
Paloma.
What?
That run with the bulls
is in Paloma.
Uh, no, ray,
I'm pretty sure
it's Pamplona.
I mean, who's Paloma?
Isn't that
somebody's daughter?
Mm-mmm.
So, when did you
get around to talking
about the comic books?
Well, it just--
I didn't feel right
about it,
so it just
didn't come up.
So, what'd you
talk about?
Well, I told you, stuff.
You know, her life.
Stuff?!
Yeah, stuff.
So you never thought
to ask her
if she was comin' around
to selling me the books?
If she was comin' around
to selling me the books?
Oh, no, I did get around
to asking her that much.
And?
No way.
I've been reading
Hemingway.
"Papa" Hemingway.
It's all because
of you, you know?
Oh, dear, what have
I gone and done now?
It's all that talk
about Spain.
The running
of the bulls.
You're not reading
cliff notes now?
No.
Or comic versions?
Or comic versions?
that used to adapt books?
Yeah, it was called
classics illustrated.
But they did
mostly older books,
like, um, h. G. Wells
and
3 musketeers.
I bet they could not
transport you like Hemingway.
Now, hold on.
There are good
and bad writers
in all mediums.
Comics are just
a different type
of storytelling.
You don't really
internalize as much.
Oh.
Did you like that?
Wow. Internalize.
I think
it's probably
the first time
I think
it's probably
the first time
I've ever
used that word.
don't you go
getting giddy on me.
You know,
I didn't realize
that you needed help
gardening. I can do that.
Oh, no,
that's all right.
Archie's doing great.
He used to help
his mother.
Did you know that?
No, I didn't.
Yeah, um, back
before she died.
Hmm.
How's Norman?
How's Norman?
Recovering.
That was careless of him
not to turn off
that fuse box,
wasn't it?
Right.
Well, I'll
see you later.
Bye-bye.
She seems upset.
Well, not to worry.
What harm can it do?
Chocolate?
Isn't that boy toy
you got her sweet enough?
God, ray,
I'm sorry.
Broken.
Broken in 3 places.
The doctor says
I might have
permanent wrist
mobility problems.
God, that really sucks.
She said her foot slipped
on the accelerator.
Like, yeah, yeah, yeah,
yeah, sure--that happened.
Well, why didn't you
tell the police?
I mean, they should
at least know about
the comics.
No, ok?
I'm not talkin'
to the police.
Yeah, but that's
like motive--
nah-uh-uh!
Ok, this is between
me and Norman and Judy.
Ok, this is between
me and Norman and Judy.
Now, I got
my wrist fixed...
But now I'm gonna
fix them!
No!
Yes. Who knows what
Raymond'll try next?
Why was it
that he didn't
have me arrested?
I just want
to feel safe.
Just tell me that,
smarty-pants.
No!
Do you understand me?
I forbid you, ok? No.
Forbid me?
Yeah, right.
What can I do for you?
Deal me in.
I'm the one waving
the plastic today.
You need a gun?
No, garden fertilizer.
I understand.
The streets
aren't as safe
as they used to be.
Yeah,
not with her drivin'.
Might I recommend
a derringer?
Petite,
for a woman's hand
or clutch purse.
I thought it was illegal
for a guy like you
to use words like petite
or clutch purse.
Let's talk high-caliber.
The . 45.
Damn it, no. Listen.
If you're gonna
get a gun,
at least get
a small gun.
I mean, let's
be realistic, right?
Why don't you
just take a look
at this 9 millimeter?
And bullets, of course?
So, I forget
which anthology
it was in,
but Larry never
talks about
how superman can never
even marry Lois.
How superman can never
even marry Lois.
At least,
if he did, he could
never screw her.
'Cause he'd have
supersperm,
and be superstrong
and would mess up
her insides.
Well,
Why stop there?
I mean, if supes had
supersperm,
then he would come
in a superspurt.
Who's to say
it wouldn't shoot
right out the top
of Lois' head?
Yeah, I think
he commented on that.
In the book.
how superman couldn't
even jerk off,
how superman couldn't
even jerk off,
because the sperm
would have the ability
to fly.
'Cause they're
tiny versions of him,
and how they'd forever
fly around the world
looking for eggs
to impregnate.
And that was
what it took.
Heavy rain
and buckets aplenty
to make Raymond see...
It was time
for desperate measures...
Seniors...
And desperate men.
What are we doin' here?
Uh, I'm just gonna
go see a friend of mine.
Since when did you
have friends west
of third street?
Never mind, ok? Just--
no. Since when
did you have friends
west of third street,
who hang out
in topless bars?
He's an old friend of mine
from high school.
He's a good friend.
So, why are you
seeing him now?
What's with
all the questions, ok?!
I thought you were
my friend.
I asked you to help me.
I need some help
right now, ok?
Ok.
Will you help me?
Ok.
Will you help me?
Ok.
I need help.
Help. Help me!
Fine. Ok.
What do you want me
to do?
Here. I want you
to hold this.
What?!
Are you
shittin' me, man?!
Look, it's dangerous
in there, ok?
And if I come out runnin',
just, uh, fire a shot
in the air--
fire a shot
in the air?!
Yeah. Scare 'em.
But what if they
don't get scared?
What if they
shoot back at me?
Just--just--
I'll be back in a minute.
Hey, Carter.
It's--it's--it's me,
Raymond macgillicuddy.
No bells.
Come on,
central high spartans,
class of '84. Whoo!
Still no bells.
Still no bells.
Ain't she sweet?
Oh, yeah.
That's one sweet piece
of p*ssy pie
right there, huh?
That's my girlfriend.
Uh, um...
So, what do you want?
I haven't seen you
here before.
Which is surprising,
which is surprising,
'cause I see your kind
here all the time.
Well, I don't have
that many dollar bills
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"Comic Book Villains" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 29 Aug. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/comic_book_villains_5807>.
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