Coup de torchon Page #3

right Marcel?

What did he do?

He won't say it out of modesty.

But he's told it 20 times over.

I just can't get enough.

And get it

through your head, Fred,

there's only one way

to deal with scum like that.

Yeah, but you've got

more guts than me.

Going to the whorehouse

all by yourself.

I've only got myself, dimwit!

That's true.

Speaking of pimps...

Isn't your brother-in-law...

A pimp? Nono?

He's too stupid even for that.

No woman'd look at him,

except Huguette.

Of course, she's his sister.

I don't see a resemblance.

You'd never guess

they're brother and sis.

That did surprise me at first.

You may be in for another

surprise some day, poor Lucien!

Another round on Cordier!

As Foch says:

When you're a lion...

you can't be a clam.

I've had worse than your pimps.

And where do you think

they are now?

In jail?

Some day you'll learn a coffin

costs the state less

than a man in a cell, old chum.

Say, Bartali beat Verwaeck

at Brianon by 17 minutes.

Natch. He pledged his bike

to the Virgin Mary.

Bartali?

If you need a hand with

your pimps, call me.

...if they come back.

- Why shouldn't they?

- Could be dead.

- Why dead?

Could've been killed.

And you're a suspect.

- You crazy?

- Why, you advertised it.

I never said I killed them.

I said I gave 'em a lesson.

A black eye is a lesson.

A bullet in the head's a lesson too.

I've never even seen 'em.

Of course, they couldn't be there.

You're not telling me

you've killed them?

Look at me!

How can you think that?

But you,

after all your bragging around...

If the bodies

ever popped up

I wouldn't want to be

in your shoes.

You heard right, Marcel.

All you can do now is pray...

Pray that if they were really killed,

they'll never find the bodies.

You speak and folks believe you.

That's some gift!

Put that in your pipe!

- How many today?

- Five.

- Dysentery?

- Obviously.

- All blacks?

- No, one white.

Oh yes, one white. That's life.

Are you dumping him in the river?

Are you crazy? It's the

graveyard for the white one!

Does it hurt?

Look at me.

Am I hurting you?

She's got something in her eye.

Open your eye...

Much work?

Dirty work.

Sometimes, I just want to drop

everything. But I can't...

I never will.

That'll do it.

There, all better now.

Give us a kiss.

And me?

What are you waiting for?

Do your job.

Stop it! Marcaillou!

Goddammit!

- He won't sell me peanuts.

- He won't pay what's fair.

- So what?

- Now you've knocked him out.

You gonna arrest me

for clubbin' a n*gger?

No, not exactly...

The main thing is the board.

- The board?

- Yeah, covering that hole there...

What if somebody fell in and broke

his leg? It'd be your fault.

- So?

- So, being as nobody did,

I'll let you off this time.

You never arrest anybody.

You've got to show folks

you're brave, honest,

and hard-working.

Here, hold this.

I can't.

Why not?

First, because I'm not brave,

honest and hard-working.

And second, I don't think

my chiefs want me to be.

What are you talking about?

Well, they wouldn't have

picked me otherwise.

- That's how I see it.

- Sophism.

And no reason to let

Marcaillou get away.

The trouble is he's Rose's husband.

We're good friends, Rose and me,

that's all.

But if I arrest him,

folks'll jump to conclusions.

Let them. Do your duty.

Get rid of the trash

that poisons us all!

And who's gonna get rid of

the sh*t that poisons my house?

All in good time, each thing

in turn and one after the other.

For the general good,

Marcaillou first.

Then we'll get to your

particular problem.

If you say so.

May God grant you

the courage you lack.

That trash, they won't

get me like that.

There, boy, go and get it!

What brings you around here,

you turd?

Hands off my gun.

- You won't need it anymore.

- I've got a hunting license.

- You won't need that neither.

I'm hanging around here to see your wife.

And she's gonna give me

what you never got.

Don't move!

Africans hate a boring death...

...in a hospital say, with doctors,

nurses and priests...

You, you won't have a boring death.

I know kicking a dying man

isn't very nice.

But first, I wanted to

and second, there's no risk involved.

You know,

this hurts me more than you.

No luck, damn it.

His dog has just come back.

- We've got a minute, right?

- You know I want you.

I'm not so sure... if you really

wanted to... it's a minute...

- You know very well it wouldn't.

- I'd love to take you in my lap.

- Stop it please, don't say such things...

- I'd love to lift your dress,

and you could just take it off

and let me see the nice things it hides.

You could slide it over

your shoulders, then...

Oh, hell, let's go.

Why are you taking the dress off?

Just sit in my lap. I must tell you...

Tell me later... quick, come here my love.

I have a feeling I'd better

tell you beforehand.

Come here now. I want you.

It's about Marcaillou.

Something's happened to him.

Who cares! Pity he hasn't

dropped dead yet.

That's exactly it. I have a feeling

his insides got blown up.

- Really?

- He tripped over his gun.

Is he really dead?

If he isn't, he's the first guy

to get kicked in the balls and not budge.

Sh*t, I can't believe it! Pity

I didn't see the pig croak.

I'd have enjoyed ramming

a poker up his ass.

Come now, Rose,

a little respect, he's dead now...

You really shouldn't curse.

It's ugly, ugly and impolite.

That's not my fault Lucien.

He taught me that.

I was well behaved until

I met the f***er, son of a...

How come you're still

wearing your slip?

I'd rather you take it off.

Yes, caress me...

I'm coming...

Must be the good news.

The soup smells good.

It's just bean soup,

but homegrown.

His brother back home sends us

a few bags now and then.

- And the bowl's as big as a tureen.

- That was his bowl.

No way. I'll eat his soup,

but not in his bowl.

It's strange how you don't get some things...

It'd ruin my appetite.

You can sleep in his bed, but not

eat from his bowl?

It's not the same. There's only one bed.

So I have to!

But there're other bowls.

It's more proper.

My soup...

Even dead, he pisses me off!

That's a weird dog.

I've never noticed before

he's got a stripe in the middle.

Marcaillou did that.

So we'd each pat one half.

Sounds like poor Marcaillou.

Listen, don't leave me here

all alone tonight. I'll be scared.

It's my first night alone.

There are 3 sorts of French.

Real French, shitty French

and French sh*t.

You're not even French sh*t.

That's me on our wedding day.

I didn't want to rot with him.

Drop me before the village.

Wait, Father.

Do help me, yes.

Termites. They've already

eaten up two crosses.

Good thing the Christ's

cast iron, eh?

That should hold it, thank you.

Rose is here. Be nice.

She's anxious about her husband.

Is he sick?

- Worse, maybe.

- Let's go, then.

What's wrong, my dear?

I'm worried something's happened.

He left early with his dog to go hunting.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes