Coursier Page #5

I've been in jail,

I had psychos chasing me across Paris...

I deserve an explanation, dammit!

Are you done?

I'm a courier.

Me too, that's no excuse.

You're not a Sphere courier.

Sphere, network of evil...

Sphere is the most mysterious...

I get it. Couriers for a badass kinda FedEx.

Mr. Loki always delivers.

Why's that in his phone...

if it's not work-related?

50 million euros!

They cut me loose, so I improvised.

Now you're the courier.

No more explanations.

Listen. You come up here now

or I'm gone.

I'm coming.

So maybe you're...

Stephanie's cousin.

Rico, are we good?

It's Toff.

Not now, Toff.

- The rocks aren't the package.

- What?

Loki isn't delivering the jewels.

He'll swap them for something else.

What's he delivering?

I'm working on it.

Who's that?

I gotta go.

Hang up!

- Hold on, the wedding cake!

- Wait!

Nadia!

- You OK?

- The cake...

Nadia!

Sh*t!

Sam!

My baby love!

Come here!

- Get outta here!

- The cake!

Quick, I'll create a diversion.

Chip 'n Dale, you wanna race?

He's always gotta show off.

It's OK, I'm fine.

The guy's insane!

A tiny little job.

It'll take you 10 minutes tops!

He's stealing our bike.

It's on your way.

Motherf***er!

I know now.

You're Tatiana,

Marinette's cousin.

Rico? What are you doing?

Great new hostage. You keep them in stock

or hire them as you need them?

You're kidding me! Not again!

What's that?

Stop! What are you doing?

Leave me out of this!

Sam, do something!

He'll kill me!

What do you want now?

You tried to double-cross me,

so go get the expert.

The expert?

Who's the expert?

I'll call you back.

I don't believe it!

Is this never gonna end? Never!

Sh*t!

Louise? How's Nadia?

Asleep. Flaked out on us.

At least, she's got it easy.

Loki's got Rico.

Take Nadia to 10, Rue du Soleil.

I'll meet you there.

Sam?

Sam, I know you're there!

Sam, get the door.

Open up now!

Ice?

What time is it? Where's Sam?

He stole my Zoomer!

I don't care, come in.

He's moving again.

Don't lose him this time.

We need the expert.

Where is this expert?

Versailles.

- Where in Versailles?

- Near the chateau.

Hold on...

I'll jot it down.

Sam, I write with a broken heart.

I so wanted to be your wife but...

I need a man, not a boy.

I tried so hard, but this really is the end.

Are you ready?

I've lost the signal. I'll call you.

What's wrong?

A problem?

Can you pull over?

- Ice.

- What?

Here...

Careful with it.

I can't do this. Look at me.

You're my date now. You wanna be with me or not?

- It won't work.

- It will. Why not?

- I'm way too hot.

- Come on, smile.

Hi there!

- This is Sam.

- Nice to meet you.

Right, dad, mom, this is...

Sam.

The infamous Sam.

Consuela!

Jorge!

So happy to meet you!

So are we. The pleasure's all ours.

Nadia's told us so much.

I love her so much, with all my corazon!

She's marveloose! Let's fiesta!

What the hell's got into you?

Your folks are Porties, aren't they?

What?

Portuguese!

I'm like that, an outgoing guy.

I bland in with the crowd.

You bland in?

Don't you mean blend in?

Like we give a sh*t!

You gave her bathroom scales on Valentine's Day?

Not bathroom scales,

a state-of-the-art personal weight tracker.

It even talked!

You've put on weight. Bad.

You've lost weight. Good.

Amazing!

It sucks?

OK, I get it, I suck.

She was too good for me.

I always mess up.

College, career and now my relationship.

Maybe it's genetic.

Maybe. You know what?

You're a limp dick, aren't you?

What the heck!

Totally limp!

That's not nice.

And Montmartre? That was limp dick?

It wasn't the feat of the century.

You'd have done it?

Sure, and better.

Without the crappy crash!

You can ride, can you?

What can you do except go psycho?

Okay?

Can we go now?

Shall we go?

Sure.

You got a signal?

- No.

- No?

No, as in N-O. Clear?

I'll do the job, no problem,

but on my terms and my way.

Don't bother calling back. I'll call you.

That's a man!

He blew you off!

That's my man! He really...

I didn't say a word. Put that thing down.

He so blew you off!

Black & Jack.

It's me. Another change of plans.

- At last!

- You look wonderful!

We waited for you.

It's only my wedding, nothing major.

- You're stressed...

- Not at all!

I get married all the time, didn't you know?

Look!

My gift from Gustave!

Great.

Great, isn't it?

- How's things?

- Fine, thanks.

When do we get to meet Sam?

After all this time. You brought him?

Sweetie, check it out!

- Who's that?

- That's him.

- Classy! 16 inches?

- What?

The wheels?

Aluminum, 16 inches?

An elocution problem or is he just a jerk?

- He's taking lessons.

- He learns fast.

Go easy!

Auto show stuff!

- That's so funny.

- No, it's not.

So, what will you say to Nadia?

I'll think of something. I'll improvise.

Why not tell her the truth?

What truth?

That you love her. You love her like mad.

You're so crazy about her

you'd risk your life for her.

That's good.

That's very good.

Cut it out!

Why are you screwing this up for me?

Sweetie, you wanted a loser, you got one.

I'm not your fool.

You're embarrassed to come alone, so you use me.

I'll give you embarrassment. Big time!

You couldn't be Sam if you wanted to.

Know why?

You don't have an ounce of his class.

Classy Sam? Yeah, right.

So classy, he doesn't show.

Go get me a drink before I lose my temper.

Sam?

- What's he doing here?

- Where's my Zoomer?

- He's sick.

- Completely.

- We have to talk to Nadia.

- Let's go.

- We need to talk.

- Who's the babe?

Nadia, who's he? And who's she?

- Who?

- Who's that?

- That's Louise.

- Right.

She's my driver.

I'm my own boss so I have my own driver.

Actually, could you move the car?

- Without scratching it.

- Yes, sir.

Can't get the staff.

Sorry, I didn't introduce myself.

Mr. and Mrs. Figueira?

Sam Skjqurilngskwicz.

He's called Sam, too?

Yes, he's called Sam.

Who's the other one?

The other one, right...

He's another Sam. This is the real Sam.

And there was this other Sam...

Baby...

Stop it. Let's stop.

Good idea.

I'm Nadia's boyfriend and...

I'm not at all my own boss. I'm a courier.

I don't know what the future holds

for me and Nadia,

but I can say I love your daughter.

Truly.

And we really need a talk

or we'll ruin everything. OK?

I'll borrow her a few minutes and bring her back.

Who the hell's the chick?

- He seems nice.

- Courier?

Were you in a fight?

- It's complicated.

- C'mon, talk to me.

- Are you sure?

- Go on.

The 10-minute package

was full of cash to buy Louise's jewels.

The guys behind all this, Sphere,

are really dangerous.

Find the expert.

- What's he look like?

- Your dad!

Her again!

The wedding dance!

Loki gave me it to get the jewels

and kidnapped you.

- Kidnapped me?

- And drugged you!

That's right.

We rescued you thanks to Louise, who...

Louise! You really like her.

A**hole mission!

Loki still wants the jewels,

not the ones we stole,

and for us to find an expert

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