Crackers Page #3

We could hang that parachute

harness up in here.

I'll be the Red Baron!

Mr. Weslake?

[ Turns Up Volume ]

[ Approaching Footsteps ]

I can just see your bare ass

swingin' in that harness.

[ Clears Throat ] Mr. Weslake? Yes?

Sorry to bother you, but, uh, I

have to get your block converter.

My what? The little box on your TV.

My cable? Why? It works terrific. [ Laughs ]

You're a little behind on your

subscription payments. Me?

Six months. No, no, no. That's gotta be

some kind of computer foul-up at the bank.

It's okay. I'll make it all right.

Look, you can't take it. I've been waiting

for ages for that Nakajima-Cuellas fight.

You can't take it now. Sorry, Mr.

Weslake, but don't worry about the fight.

Nakajima, he's gonna tear him apart.

Won't be much to see.

[ Static ]

[ Humming ]

[ Kids Chattering ]

That's awful. What?

If you're gonna do it, do it right.

Tack it in the joint there. Keeps it

out of sight, doesn't look so messy.

[ Clock Cuckooing ]

Come here.

Huh? What? Take a look.

Ohh. You wanna sell your father's watch?

No. Are you telling me what time it is?

No, I was just wondering what

something like that might be worth.

To me?

It's real gold. Plate.

[ Clock Chiming ] Gold! Solid gold.

It runs great.

It's running a little slow.

[ Groans ] Six bucks.

Six bucks! It's an antique!

We're talkin' about a time when men

made things by hand. That was then.

These days, you buy a watch,

you wanna see what time it is.

Look, Weslake, you don't wanna hock this.

Here, here. Come on.

You know, it's a good thing

I don't need the money,

because if I was serious about pawning

that watch, you would have made me angry.

Very angry! Listen, business is business.

Yeah. Yeah, business is business.

Well, here's a nickel.

I'm gonna use the john.

Oh, the best things in life are free.

[ Chuckling ]

[ Humming ]

[ Humming Continues ]

[ Humming ]

[ Singing ]

Turtle! I'll meet you

in Garvey's in ten minutes.

Good morning, Mrs. O'Malley.

Aye. Good morning.

Jasmine, we're going now. Hi.

And don't be creative. Just move the

furniture exactly the way we told you.

Oh, and Jasmine?

Huh? Don't use my cast iron pan.

It's only for omelettes.

Worry me about a pot and a pan!

[ Door Slams ]

Nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen...

Weren't you just doin' that?

He don't want me to forget,

so he keeps me practicin'.

Remember what you were talkin'

about yesterday? Yeah.

I think we may be able

to work somethin' out.

There's a girl cleaning the apartment

on the second floor right behind us.

Entrance is on 23rd Street.

Go in there and find out who lives

there, what their hours are;

Make a little drawing of the

apartment, where everything is. Okay?

What's that got to do with

Dillard, Ramon and Garvey?

If you and me are going to be

working together, I'm in charge.

Got it? Meet me at my

place, up there, at 3:00.

3119. Just up the street.

Okay? Wait, wait.

What do I get? Rich... maybe.

Depends on what she says.

And, Boardwalk... keep your mouth shut.

You're talkin' to the right man. [ Fussing ]

Come on, Tyrone.

[ Grunts ] Give me the key.

What for? You gotta trust him, Garvey.

He's installing it.

[ Garvey ] All right. Now

let's see if it works.

[ Button Clicks ] Let's see.

Nobody broke in yet. We have to wait?

Jesus. I'm gonna lock the

door from the outside,

and you open the door without the key.

That's somebody breakin' in.

It's all wired to the key.

All right. All wired to the key.

[ Player Piano Playing ]

[ Electric Fan Whirring ]

[ Cymbals Clanging, Chittering ]

[ Cuckooing, Chiming ]

[ Car Horn Honking,

Cymbal Clanging, TV Static ]

[ Gadgets Continue Clamoring ]

[ Screaming, Frankenstein Growls ]

[ Horn Blaring ]

Yippee! Let her blow!

[ Garvey ] Shut it off already!

No, here, I'll do it!

Disturb the whole neighborhood.

Shut it off! Whoa!

[ Clamoring Continues ] Shut it off, huh?

[ Clamoring Continues, Loud Explosion ]

[ Garvey ] It doesn't work! The

stupid switch doesn't work!

Dillard, come on, do something!

[ Din Continues ]

[ Sirens, Gadgets Winding Down ]

Power main.

Okay, hold it! Right there!

Nobody moves! Put your gun away, Ronnie.

Garvey's just testing his new burglar alarm.

Weslake, what's going on?

You're telling me Garvey paid for an alarm?

[ Laughing ]

[ Mocking Laughter ] That's right, wise guy.

You hear it this Saturday, you come

in blasting. You got my permission.

Good morning, madam.

I'm with the gas company.

[ Tyrone Cooing ]

Say, babe, I'm your gas man.

[ Sniffing ]

Tyrone! No, no! Not now!

[ Continues Cooing ]

Look, I know it's the only

thing you do real good,

but there is a time and a place for

everything, and this ain't that, okay?

Good morning, sugar.

I'm with the gas... company.

What? [ Sniffing ]

It's not gas. [ Sniffing ]

[ Tyrone Cooing ] Let me take the baby.

And watch how I do it. I'm

only gonna show you one time.

Right on, Tyrone.

What's your name?

Jasmine. And I'm busy.

Hey, hey, that's what I

came to talk to you about.

I can make you very busy.

Don't let these work clothes fool you none.

You're looking at a highly-respected

interior decorator...

who just happen to believe in doing

the important work her own self.

You did all this? I'm doing it.

So, if you'd kindly be about your

business, I'll be about mine.

Hey, lady, cool out!

Look, I just thought we might be able

to help each other a little bit.

You are a fine looking woman, you know.

Help each other?

Yeah. You're smart too. I can see that now.

You think you can help me?

You name the place.

Wonderful.

Now, we'll move the dining

room over there in the bay...

and we'll make this the den.

Uh, you'll move the couch

perpendicular to the fireplace.

Oh, and of course, this china closet...

will go in the bay as well.

Where you goin'? I gotta see Ramon.

Yeah? Why? He copy keys?

I gave him back the key.

Yeah, but you can do pretty good with

wax if you know what you're doin'.

Come on.

That was Ramon's idea. I

didn't like it from the start.

What are you gonna do? I'm

gonna think about it.

You and him meet me at my place

this afternoon at 4:00, 3119, okay?

Dillard, tell your pal

that was a really dumb idea.

The guys that rig alarms are

the first ones they check.

Turtle!

Nobody move!

- Get your hands up.

- [ Giggling ]

- Keep 'em up.

- [ Maria Giggling ]

Gonna put cuffs on.

[ Both Laughing ]

If he catches you here alone with me...

Little Ramon? Mi amigo Ramoncito?

That's no problem.

You like to live dangerously or what?

It's only the good die young.

Are you a mechanic too?

No, I'm a musician. Oh, yeah, sure.

That's what everybody says. Oh, no, listen.

[ Harmonica ]

[ Men's Voices ]

[ Stops Playing ] Oh, my God, it's Ramon!

Oh, good, I gotta talk to him.

No, no, no, you've got to hide.

You know what he'll do if he see you? Hide?

Pasele, Don Garrido.

Venga, Maria.

Le presento a Don Fernando

Pablo Jesus y de la Vaca.

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