Crash Pad Page #9

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It doesn't matter.

Hannah's right. It was

screwed from the beginning.

Really?

But you're the best powerpoint

player in the game.

Yeah, well, you know what?

Not on the day that

my husband calls me

to tell me he screwed

someone else.

Right.

He's gonna f*** this up.

No, he won't.

Come on, Grady,

give her the straight sh*t.

Listen, Morgan, I, uh...

I lied about that.

I didn't sleep with anybody.

I tried, but I didn't.

Why not?

Because I couldn't stop

thinking about you.

And about us.

That's good.

I owe you an apology,

and I get that now.

Grady, what do you get?

That I'm the one that

screwed up our marriage.

I neglected you,

and I abandoned us.

And your firm took off,

and my career took off...

I tried. I was trying

so hard, Grady.

I know you did.

I saw it. But I was stupid,

and I was lazy,

and I took you, the only woman

I've ever been in love with,

I took you for granted,

just like a...

An a**hole.

And I'm sorry, Morgan.

But a**holes can learn.

And I think, in a positive

way, our love has been tested.

Not unlike Aladdin

in the thunder cave,

or even Willy Wonka

when he was giving food away

to the homeless. What?

He's getting Wonka all wrong.

Oh, Grady. I'm sorry, too.

Look, I do know one thing.

Sometimes you have to

completely lose somebody

before you can really appreciate

what they mean to you.

F***er.

I'm almost impressed right now.

Oh, don't be.

Grady subconsciously knew

what I was doing.

You think? Yeah.

He's too mule-headed

to come see her on his own,

so I just gave him an

excuse rooted in an emotion

he's comfortable expressing.

Blind, vengeful fury.

Hmm.

On second thought, that is pretty

impressive. Admire me accordingly.

Well, as Mary Poppins and a

paraphrased Jesus once said,

"my work here is done."

Goodbye, Hannah.

Bye.

You're welcome. What?

Hey!

Oh.

We wanted to thank him.

Yeah, well, it'll have to wait.

He's on to his next adventure.

Or whatever.

He seems different somehow.

Like, I don't know.

Like a big, beautiful condor

that people will

respect and fear.

"I can't believe that used to

be stensland," they'll say.

"I can't believe that

used to be stensland."

That is delightful and witty.

I know.

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