Danny the Champion of the World Page #3

- (Rabbit squeals)

- Ssh!

Come on, come on.

He'd bite it right off to get out of this.

(Rabbit squeals)

Ssh... It's a vile thing.

Just what you'd expect from Hazell.

There you go. Off you go. Go on. Go on.

(Bell rings)

Dad!

- Oh, no!

- Come on, Dan.

(Scales being played on instruments)

Ah, Smith! How kind of you

to grace us with your presence at last.

Sorry, sir. My dad told me to tell you...

I don't want any of your excuses.

You're late, boy.

Late!

Come here.

Now, what did I say

about unpunctuality? Hm?

I said it would be punished, didn't I?

1,000 lines by tomorrow morning.

Now get to your place.

- Hi, Dad.

- Hi, Danny.

- What happened?

- I got a thousand lines.

- Didn't you explain?

- Didn't get a chance to.

He's got it in for you, hasn't he?

Suppose I'd better get on with it.

How's it going?

547 lines to go.

I thought I might go out again tonight.

Is that all right?

Course!

I'll be back by nine. Don't wait up.

Lights out and bed at eight. Promise?

Promise.

- You will be back?

- Of course I will.

Unless the keepers catch me.

Don't worry. They won't.

I'll be up in Hazell's woods.

(William) I'll be back by nine. Don't wait up.

Dad?

Dad!

(Engine starts)

(Gears crunch)

(Gears crunch)

(Engine judders)

Come on! Lights!

(Gears crunch)

(Gears crunch)

(Inaudible)

(Engine stalls)

(Handbrake on)

(Police bell rings)

(Police bell rings)

(Tyres screech)

(Police bell rings)

(Police bell rings)

(Bell fades)

(Sighs)

(Bird squawks)

(Twigs snap)

(Men's voices in distance)

(Man coughs)

(First man) Here, did you see a light?

(Second man) Nah.

(Snapping sound)

What was that?

Nothing. Let's get on with it.

I want to get home.

(Second man)

Hazell and his fancy ideas! Huh!

He doesn't pay us fancy wages, does he?

(First man)

By golly, I think we've got one.

(Second man) You're right.

Do you no good to hide your face!

We've got you now, my lad. (Laughs)

- Let's have the beggar out!

- No, we're gonna fetch Hazell.

It was his idea. He can take responsibility.

I've a pretty good idea

who we've got down there. Come on.

- Wait a minute. We can't leave him here.

- Look...

If he could get out,

he'd have got out, wouldn't he?

Come on.

Dad? Is that you, Dad?

- (Whispers) Danny!

- Are you all right?

Danny...

I think I've broken my ankle.

I don't know how I can get out.

There's a tow rope in the Austin.

Here?

Good boy.

It's all right for some!

(Inaudible)

(# Lively jazz from inside)

(Hazell whistles)

Good boy. That's right.

Good and secure, Danny.

- Oh!

- Are you all right?

(Owl hoots)

Give us your arm...

(Both groan)

Pull me, Danny.

Pull, Dan. Come on!

(Both groan)

Well, well, well.

Grrr! You bloody fools!

- I don't understand this.

- (Car engine)

Into reverse.

Well, get after him!

Give it more acceleration.

It's skidding.

Give her some gun.

Go on. Good boy.

Gently now with the clutch.

That's right.

Good, good. Keep going.

That's it. Clutch in, clutch in!

(Both laugh)

Woo-hoo!

- It was that beggar from the garage.

- Course it was.

- If he tries that again...

- He will.

I don't have to remind you

that you are legally entitled

to shoot him on sight.

Yes, I want him. I don't care

how you get him, just get him!

100 quid apiece in it for you

when you do.

Very well, thank you very much.

Thank you.

Yes. Well, they're...they're on their way.

- (Winces)

- Sorry.

You ought to take something for the pain.

- This'll do me.

- You can be too stoical, you know.

Mm.

Bloody awful man, Hazell.

Oh, er...

Sorry, Dan, you didn't hear that.

Absolutely appalling. I mean,

you could've been killed, you know.

Oh, yes, you could. You could.

Good heavens, I was thinking of popping up

to the woods myself one of these nights.

Imagine. It's disgraceful.

Utterly, utterly disgraceful!

- (Bicycle bell rings)

- A-ha.

- Morning, William.

- Morning, Enoch.

- Danny.

- Morning.

- Doc.

- Sergeant.

Ooh... Do look nasty.

Is it broken?

Hmm... We've had a complaint

from Mr Lord God Almighty Hazell.

- Oh, yes?

- Yes.

He says that you was up in his woods

last night poaching his pheasants

and that you might have broken your ankle.

I'm afraid I've got to take a statement.

Right, then.

Can you account

for your whereabouts last night?

The suspect replied

that he was at home all night.

How do you account

for your ankle being broken?

The suspect replied

that he broke it accidental...

falling down the steps of his caravan.

Very good. Very good!

(Vehicle approaching)

That'll be your ambulance, Doctor.

- Don't worry, I'll be back tonight.

- Good luck, Dad.

(Mouths)

Well done, Sergeant.

They'll just set the bone, plaster

him up, and he'll be as right as rain.

(Policeman) Right, I'll be off now, then.

(Thunder)

(Pouring rain outside)

(Thunder)

(Car horn)

- Dad, are you all right?

- I'm all right, my love.

A bit woozy.

- I got up at two.

- Got up at two?

I'm getting wet, Rabbetts!

So, we fell down our own stairs,

did we?

- Look here, you listen to me!

- No, you listen to me!

I know what's going on here.

You're all in this together.

What do you take me for?

I'm warning you, Smith.

You trespass again, you're gonna get shot.

Who the devil do you think you are?

You've got money

so you think you've got right to...

Shut up, will you?

- Do you hear me, Smith?

- At the moment, you're on my land.

You have one minute to get off it.

Come on.

- Summons the beggar.

- No. I want to catch him red-handed.

- But he might not try it again.

- Course he will.

He won't be able to resist it. He'll

risk anything to get even with me.

And when we get him, boys,

we'll see what he'll take

for this precious garage of his.

(Laughs)

(Coughs)

- Better?

- That's much better. (Wheezes)

You know, that fellow, he...

He really ought to be...

Yes, he... I mean, he ought to be...

Well, he ought to be, oughtn't he?

He will be. I'll see to that.

A lovely tea, Danny.

Thank you very much.

And now, William,

this is to make you sleep.

Oh, no, no, no. No, honestly.

Oh, yes, yes, yes, honestly.

Straight away, too.

Go on, Dad.

(Sighs) All right, then.

(Whispers) Hey, Danny!

You two boys...

Stand up.

Morgan.

Smith.

Up.

Now...what were

you whispering about, hmm?

Nothing, sir.

- You were cheating.

- No, sir.

You were cheating.

Come out here, both of you.

(Creaking)

Smith, here.

- Hold out your hand.

- I was not cheating, sir.

Boys who whisper during exams

are cheating. Hold out your hand.

- (Loud crack)

- (Children gasp)

Smith, I haven't finished yet.

(Snoddy) Captain Lancaster!

I'd like a word with you,

immediately, if you please.

(Children all talk at once)

Captain Lancaster, I thought I'd made

it crystal clear when I appointed you

that I will not tolerate any form

of corporal punishment in my school.

I was perfectly within my rights.

The boys were cheating.

Oh, were they? Were they indeed?

Ah, right.

Dan, Dan. Ssh! Danny.

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