Daria: Is It College Yet? Page #5

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I'm a sucker for those tear-jerkers.

Are you kidding? I love hospital room movies. And I hate seeing them with guys.

They always get mad because nothing blows up.

Daria, can we finish our conversation?

Tom got into Bromwell. So you see, they're not rejecting everyone.

Oh, well, some people have a certain... edge over the rest of us.

You don't say. Look, I didn't mean to snap at you, but you're the one who told

me about the advantages of a Bromwell education.

That doesn't mean Raft...

I didn't get into the school that I wanted, and you wanted for me. What am I

supposed to think about my prospects?

Your prospects? Daria, you'll be going to your second choice college, not

prison. Look at me: I went to Middleton. It's not half the school that Raft is.

What?

Middleton's not half the school that Raft is, as you know damned well. I applied

to college during the height of the baby boom. Competition was so fierce I got

rejected from my first and second choices. And, see, I lived to tell about it.

Hmm.

I made the most of the education I did get, and so will you. Raft is an

excellent school. You should be very proud. I know I am.

Um, Dad seems to think Middleton's hot stuff.

Your father needs to maintain certain illusions about his youth in order to

function. It's... cute.

I hope I don't end up the same way.

Daria, you're destined for great things no matter where you go to school. I know it.

Hmmm. All right, then. I suppose I can stop worrying about getting into college

and start worrying about this disgusting elitism I have managed to develop

during the process.

Good. That'll keep you from worrying about what kind of weirdo you'll get for a roommate.

Quinn, didn't you love that movie? It was so sad when Eleanor died.

Um, Eleanor didn't die. Her sister Eileen did.

Oh, right. Eileen. What should we do now? Wanna to go clubbing?

Um, thanks, but I'm still in high school. You know, underaged.

Oh, yeah. That sucks.

Well, look, it's so nice out, let's just pick up some wine and hang out in the park.

Umm, Lindy, are you sure you want more to drink? It's getting kind of late.

That's what the morning's for. Sleep. Now, where is my car?

Lindy, maybe you shouldn't drive. Come on, I'll call us both a cab.

Well, well, if it isn't Miss Morgendorffer the Younger.

And who is your comely companion?

Upchuck, don't get any ideas or anything, but I need a ride home.

No, you don't.

Do my ears deceive me? A delectable damsel in distress reaching out to Senr

Suavicito in her hour of need?

Lindy, it's no big deal, he just lives around the corner from me, that's all.

In fact, why don't you come, too? We can pick up your car tomorrow. Do you mind

driving my friend home, Upchuck?

Quinn, the night is so young. I think I'm gonna hit a couple of clubs after all.

See you tomorrow.

Lindy, come on, we'll drive you to the clubs! Lindy!

I don't understand the charade about being neighbors, my lissome enchantress,

but it concerns me not. Come, allow me to escort you to my... chariot.

Get away from me, you creep. Hello, Cabs 'n Stuff?

Hello?

That crack I made was stupid and completely out of line.

Thank you for the bulletin, but I already knew that.

Forgive me?

What's in it for me?

Let's say, for the sake of argument, that my family connections at Bromwell did

help me get in. I'm sure that my parents would be happy to write a letter of

recommendation for you. What do you say?

Yes, Virginia, there really is such a thing as noblesse oblige. Thanks, but I'll

pass. I'd rather get in on my own merits, and besides, I think I'm gonna like

Raft just fine.

You sure?

Yeah, but thanks.

Your eight o'clock is here.

Send him in.

Come in, Mack. Have a seat, and congratulations about Vance.

Thank you. Thanks for squeezing me in before school.

No problem, no problem. You said on the phone you wanted to talk about Jodie?

Yeah.

You're not gonna ask me for her hand in marriage, are you? Because I'm too young

to be a grandfather, Mack, you understand?

Grandfather? Ummm, no, Mr. Landon, it's nothing like that.

Thank you, God! I mean... of course not. So, how can I help you?

I hope you don't think I'm out of line, but Jodie's been acting really unhappy

lately, and I think it's because of Crestmore.

Impossible! We had a long talk about it and she's really looking forward to going.

With all due respect, sir, I don't believe that's true. I think she really needs

a different kind of environment. Like Turner.

How is she gonna go to Turner? She didn't even apply.

Look, Michael, if Jodie passes on Crestmore, she'll end up regretting it for the

rest of her life.

Anyway, if she really wanted to go to Turner, she'd have applied there.

She did. She got in.

What?

She got in. She's afraid to tell you.

Well, that was nice of Tom to offer to get his folks to write to Bromwell.

It's just that the whole thing smacks of some crappy romance novel where the

troubled young viscount decides the lowly stable girl is good enough for him

after all.

I always saw you as more of a scullery maid.

And why should the Sloane's seal of approval

matter more to Bromwell than my transcripts?

"Dear Dean Skippy, please admit Daria. She's a fine young woman, even if she

isn't one of us."

Exactly. Besides, if they write a recommendation, it'll just make it that much

worse when I do get that ultimate rejection.

You are very wise for a humble laundress, and generous, too.

How come you bought the pizza?

To make you feel too guilty to storm off in a huff when I ask if you've sent

your portfolio in to BFAC yet.

Why bother? It's too late.

Not for mid-year enrollment.

Daria, I already told you. I'm just not the college type.

Oooh, a cheeseless bell pepper pizza! And you don't even like cheeseless.

Hey! Nothing but the best for my babe!

I just love bell peppers. You can almost hear them ringing.

Hey, Brit, even if you're gone away to Great Prairie State next year, you'll

still be my babe, right? I mean, no matter where I go? Right?

Um, sure. Why do you ask?

I just wanted to see how deep is your love, babe. Hey, and speaking of deep,

watch this! I'm a clown, I'm a clown, I'm a... Funny, huh babe?

I couldn't paint anything decent with that application hanging over my head,

anyway. Believe me, that portfolio would never have gotten me into BFAC.

Que ironico, the minute the pressure was off, I started doing some really

interesting stuff again.

So it's the old "reject them before they reject me."

Yeah, the same thing you're doing with Bromwell.

I was already rejected by Bromwell.

So was I. By State U and Lawndale State.

But you told me you don't care what their sucky art departments thought of your work.

Really. They're so sucky they didn't even ask to see it.

What?

They didn't ask to see any of my stuff, so I didn't send any.

Wait. You get rejected by schools that don't care if you have artistic talent,

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