Darling Page #6

For Christ's sakes, smile, love!

All right, that's it.

All right. Sorry.

It's all over now.

You're doing good. Marvelous.

Listen, darling. Drink your booze.

Drink this, love. Come on.

- Malcolm!

- Gonna be a happy girl?

You're gonna be happy.

'Cause you really are a very pretty girl.

Very good.

Could we have a look at that again?

Thank you so much.

The question is, is she overexposed?

Sorry. Have the public

seen too much of her face?

How can they see too much of this face?

- We do get continuity of image.

- Good thinking.

- Buy her then, do you, Kurt?

- Definitely.

She's got a sort of Aryan quality.

She'd go down extremely well in Germany.

How about this for the Happiness Girl?

Kurt, you must have a look at this.

- For the German territory, I'm happy.

- There it is.

We want you to be the Happiness Boy, Kurt.

Gentlemen, please.

Very well, then. We're all agreed.

Diana Scott...

hereinafter known as the Happiness Girl.

For you. The man who turned the tide

at Monte Carlo.

Darling, bless you.

Can I help you, madam?

Yes. Do you think I could see

some peaches in brandy, please?

Certainly, madam,

if you'd just come this way.

- Have you got a larger size I could see?

- Yes, madam. Just wait one moment.

Brandy. Expensive,

but I think they look far too expensive.

It looks delicious to me...

I am not with you.

I have never seen you before.

You're in this up to your navel.

We can't stay here all day, you know.

Thank you, madam.

No, I did want them in a bottle.

No, thank you very much. We'll forget it.

Thank you, madam.

These look very nice.

What about these prawns?

They look delicious.

Did you see that?

I could have sworn

that man was following us.

He was!

- Outrageous!

- Oh, dear. Robert!

Rule Britannia! Britannia

Oh, my dear!

- Ting-a-ling, shop's open.

- Ting-a-ling, shop's denuded.

Honestly, you are outrageous,

and I would like you to know...

that we have only paid for

Smoggin's Shrimps.

What's that?

The Happiness Girl contract, already?

Oh, dear, my husband wants a divorce.

My husband, Tony. He wants a divorce.

Granted soon as asked, I'm sure.

I hate this flat.

You've got your escargot, then.

Have an avocado strangled with prawns.

Have a bit of smoked salmon,

stuffed with caviar...

matured in fine English gin.

For what you are about to receive,

may the Lord make you truly thankful.

- Cheers.

- Cheers.

Why is life such a piss pot?

- I have the answer to that.

- Have you?

It's the bomb, lovey. It must be.

That's right, it's the great, big...

The great, big, nasty bomb!

Let's face it, dear.

Darling's life is a great big steaming mess.

I love you. No one else does.

- No one else does.

- Poor you.

I'll tell you what I'm going to do with you.

I may be filming in Italy next month.

Italy? Fabulous, darling.

I'm very glad for you.

And if I do...

I'm going afterwards

on the most wonderful holiday of my life.

And you're coming with me.

- I am?

- You are.

To hell with them all!

We're going to have a ball!

Have a ball.

To hell with them all!

"Ashes to ashes.

"Dust to dust."

Yes, there's nothing dreamier

than Cupid Chocolates.

Those fairy-tale centers

take you out of this world...

into a land of make-believe come true.

- Cut it.

- Cut it.

- How was the view?

- Not bad, could be better.

- Listen, l...

- I'm a bit worried about the caress.

Could he caress her this time?

The jingle does say:

"The one you love to caress."

It's talking about the girl.

We'll try that.

Darling, this time

would you let him caress you?

Would you let him touch your cheek?

- I caress...

- No, he caresses you.

- All right? Please don't break it up.

- Come on, boys.

Let's try a take for the Prince.

Good afternoon, sir.

Hello. How do you do? Excuse me...

don't you think the house would be

much better seen from this angle, here?

Yes, sir, but you see,

it's a question of the lights.

The lights.

Scene 2, take 3.

Action.

"Yes, there's nothing dreamier

than Cupid Chocolates.

"Those fairy-tale centers

take you out of this world...

"into a land of make-believe come true.

"As those fairy-tale centers

melt in the mouth...

"they'll melt the heart

of the one you love to caress.

"Fairy-tale chocolates..."

He is the Pope Urban.

One of my father's many ancestors.

Should popes be ancestors?

The call came late in life. He was

an ancestor before becoming a pope.

I don't see much resemblance.

He was better-looking

when he was younger.

- Who is she?

- My mother.

She was very beautiful.

Was?

She died two years ago in a car crash.

How awful.

- Very awful.

- Here you are.

- I've ordered some tea.

- How marvelous.

Curzio's been giving me

some of the family history.

Oh, yes.

Excuse me, I must go.

I have a long way to drive.

But I hope we will meet again.

- I hope so.

- Goodbye.

- Till soon, then.

- Till soon.

He's a nice boy, Curzio.

Yes, very.

- It's so beautiful.

- I'm glad you like it.

- There's nothing like this in England.

- Thank you.

But England has the most beautiful

country houses in the world.

Have a chocolate.

No, it's different here. There's a sense of...

eternity.

A sort of peacefulness.

It's almost religious,

if you know what I mean.

Yes?

It seems to make life easier to bear.

But you don't have any problem

in bearing the weight of life, do you?

I don't know about that.

On you, it must weigh very lightly.

For me, it's different.

I recently lost someone, too.

Not like you did, but...

I don't much care

to go back to England just now.

- You have a family?

- Not like yours.

Not that supports one, gives one strength.

You have God practically in the family.

Every man is alone, in the last resolve.

And I more than most men.

Perhaps not, in some ways.

- They're beautiful.

- Yes. Like their mother.

They are. They really are lovely.

Now you must excuse me.

I swim with them every day.

It's a duty which is also a pleasure.

- Excuse me, will you?

- Of course. Thank you so much.

I don't think I'd ever in my life needed

a holiday quite so much as I did then.

And Capri was ideal.

I just wanted peace and quiet,

and just to get away from everything.

Campari?

We are not complicating our holiday

with any disgusting sexcapades.

- Brother and sister, till death us do part?

- Done. Share and share alike.

- Everything split down the middle.

- Absolutely.

- Now, tell us what's new in London.

- Nothing much.

I'll tell you who I did bump into

the other day. Robert.

- My Robert?

- The same.

- And?

- Seemed okay.

- Alone?

- Me or him?

- You think I care who you were with?

- Charming.

- Do you care who he was with?

- Not particularly.

- What was she like?

- Blonde, 21...

and extremely well-appointed, as they say.

It's okay. He was alone.

- He wasn't.

- Swear.

- You rotten...

- Thing, you. I know.

- Happy holiday.

- And you, principe. And you.

Look! What a dream!

I was just thinking how nice it'd be

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