Demoted Page #5

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to the two that I like.

These-- I love the font for sure,

but I don't know.

It might be a little busy. And--

honey, what do you think?

That's incredible.

That's-- that's--

is this Helvetica?

That's a beautiful font.

What is it made from?

Is it, like, papyrus?

You're so full of sh*t.

- What?

- Go watch the game.

- Really?

- Oh, yeah.

- You're the best.

- I know.

Can I get a kiss?

We'll do this tomorrow?

- Okay.

- Saturday.

Don't turn your uniform

pink again.

It's your wedding.

She wants you to be involved.

So I'm the worst fianc

of all time.

I'm just not into this

wedding planning stuff.

Use your imagination.

Think of it as, like, a bitchin' party

with neon lights

and techno music.

Mikey, Mikey, we're planning

my wedding, not a frat party.

J' When you want it,

you get it J'

J' 'Cause I am

sugar daddy's little girl J'

J' Sugar, sugar, sugar,

I'm sugar daddy's girl... J'

We get demoted

and he gets a new car?

Oh, yeah.

Absolutely.

Yeah, it's Ken Castro.

- No, just Ken.

- ( chirps )

Wait, does it come in ultra deluxe?

How about super ultra deluxe?

Hey, somebody want

to pick up that sign?

You know, Betty, there's a rule

against eating at your desk.

And let me tell you,

if you worked as hard as you ate,

maybe you'd get

somewhere in life, maybe.

Unless of course your goal is

to have your own gravitational pull

and become the 10th planet.

Then congratulations,

you're well on your way.

We'll have to clear

the desk out a little bit.

Hey, Castro, why don't you

lay off, man? Come on.

Stay out of this, McAdams.

This doesn't concern you.

Why don't you and Murphy go

jerk each other off in the copy room?

Now from now on,

you eat only at lunch

or on your break.

You got me?

Hey, do you got me?

Yes, Mr. Castro.

Now if you'll excuse me,

I gotta go drop the kids off

at the pool.

Why do you let him

talk to you like that?

You should stand up

for yourself.

What am I supposed to do?

Sue?

I need this job.

Besides, he ain't lying.

Look at me.

All I do is eat.

Rodney:

That's right. Stretch it out.

Are you guys sure about this?

I ain't never worked out before.

Come on, when we're done with you,

you're gonna look like Star Jones.

And that's a good thing?

She got all crazy when she got skinny.

Hey, you gotta take

the good with the bad.

Sh*t, I guess I'd rather be crazy

and skinny than fat and miserable.

- There you go.

- Okay, let's do this. Let's do this.

All right, that's our girl.

Come on now, go break a sweat.

- Okay.

- Ready? And go!

- There you go.

- There you go. Light on your toes.

Take it easy at first.

23 minutes, 42 seconds.

One more lap.

Rodney:

Lance Armstrong would be proud.

Good job, Betty.

You run like a champion.

This workout stuff's fun.

I like it.

You think we're pushing her

too hard?

Nah. Look at her.

She's having a ball out there.

She's like a wild stallion.

( Chuckles )

- Oh, Lordy.

- Oh, Sh*t.

Okay, people,

rules are going to be strictly

enforced at this company now.

It is 8:
58, people.

That means you have two minutes

to get inside and get to your desk,

'cause we start at 9:00 sharp.

Oh, hey.

Hey, uh, uh...

Soon-Yi, right?

- It's Olivia.

- Oh.

- Mr. Castro, right?

- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

- Who's this little guy?

- Oh, this is my son Jack.

I tried to get him a sitter for today,

but she's in school.

So you're just gonna bring him

up to the office?

- He's so quiet.

- Yeah, he does look quiet.

Hey, I've got a great idea--

get that thing out of here.

Move it. Get it back home.

Get rid of it.

All right, come on, folks,

let's move it.

( Hisses )

Thank you very much.

Have a great day.

Thanks.

- Hey, man.

- Hey, man.

You're here, like, every freakin' day.

What gives?

Nothing gives.

Why don't you put the bong down

and go make some coffee?

You're, like, their coffee b*tch?

What did you just call me?

Coffee b*tch?

Ha ha, that's funny, yeah.

No, go ahead, keep talking.

Call me a coffee b*tch one more time.

Go ahead. Go ahead.

I will pole-vault over this counter

and shove a cappuccino up your ass.

You got it?

No one calls me coffee b*tch.

Whatever.

There he is.

Coffee b*tch in the house.

Oh, there's my little girl,

my favorite secretary.

Why don't you take me a memo--

suck my co--

Argh! Jesus!

I told you, double-cup it.

I have very tender fingers.

I need two cups, you dumb dummy.

What took you so long?

This better be decaf. You know,

regular messes up my boner meds.

Oh, sh*t.

Hey, O'Donnell, I want that report

on my desk in an hour. You got it?

- What-- what report?

- Just do it, O'Donnell.

Sh*t, did I forget something?

Hi, honey.

What are you doing here?

I don't know. I thought I'd, you know,

stop in and surprise you.

So which one's

your new office?

Oh, baby, you don't want

to see my office.

- It's so boring.

- I do.

No, please. It's just--

it's a desk. It's a chair

They painted it today.

The fumes are nasty.

Wait, I don't care

if they painted it.

No, but they're really bad.

It's toxic. You'll faint. You'll faint.

I promise.

It's horrible in there.

Oh, God.

Okay, if I can't see your office,

then let me take you to lunch.

Where's Nancy?

Uh, you know what?

Today's really not so good for me.

I've got a lot going on.

I don't think--

- What, you can't take a lunch?

- I'd really like to, but--

- Mr. McAdams.

- What?

They're looking for you

in the conference room

for your lunch meeting.

Oh. Oh, my lunch meeting.

Of course.

Thank you, Jane.

Uh-huh, sure.

Thank you, Jane.

My lunch meeting.

See, I've got this big

lunch meeting.

I'm sorry, honey.

It's just not a good day.

I understand.

Okay, well, I will see you tonight.

Yes. Yes, you will.

- Bye.

- Bye.

So I'm gonna go

back to work.

I'm not gonna like it.

- Rodney.

- Yeah?

I'm so proud of you.

I really am.

The whole promotion and everything--

I'm just-- I just wanted

to tell you that.

Thanks.

Okay, don't work too hard.

Bye.

That was one hell of a save

back there, Jane.

Thanks for that.

What a great bluff.

These idiots should have you

working in sales.

Oh, please.

I've been trying to get in sales

here for 10 years now.

It'll never happen.

In case you hadn't noticed, women

don't get promoted in this company.

Rodney, this is still

an old-fashioned tire company.

It's a boys' club.

You know that.

Your girlfriend

doesn't know, does she?

Oh, no, that's my fiance.

Oh.

Yeah. And I am

gonna tell her,

maybe.

Well, it's complicated.

Her father wants to crush my nuts.

Well, that'll smart.

She's your fiance--

priorities.

Take care of that,

nuts and all.

Frank:
Nancy, get in here

and light my cigarette,

- you piece of sh*t.

- Yes, sir.

Okay, this report

is incomplete.

And the pages

aren't even in order.

And is some of this

written in pencil?

Well, the ink on my printer

went out, so...

I don't know how to work

the cartridge thingy.

You're unbelievable.

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