Dirty Weekend Page #5

Fine. Yeah, it is fine.

You've lived

this long being a coward.

Why should it bother me?

I... oh, please.

A lot of people find that stuff

out about themselves,

and they just

limp along in life,

just slithering along with

all the other f***ing cowards.

What, do they

teach you that in Cambridge?

Because if they did,

you got screwed.

You know what,

you can say what you want,

but the truth is,

you're running away.

Yeah, of course I am. I am.

See? Yeah, absolutely,

and with good reason...

because I have

commitments to people

and... and this isn't me.

Yeah, I think about it

a-and I was curious

about what happened,

but it's... it's not me.

This is...

this is not who I am.

I-I-I'm not

at a stage in my life

where I can just

start exploring things.

I don't chase women

at the office.

I don't want to f*** you. What?

I'm sorry, but I don't. Okay.

I may be the only man in the company

that doesn't want to f*** you,

but I don't want to...

to f*** you.

So, can we just... can we just

stop it, please? Can we...

yes, good. Please let's.

Of course. Good.

We don't ever need to talk about

that ever again. Thank you.

You're a p*ssy.

Let's just leave it at that.

Oh, ow. Ow, ow.

That really hurt.

And you know what?

Women never

used to talk like that,

you know, that kind

of vulgar language.

It wasn't meant to hurt, les.

It was a statement of fact.

That's all.

You know what?

This is so...

And why do you care, huh?

I don't get it, really.

Really, why do you

care so much, huh?

Well, I don't anymore.

I mean, you keep

pushing me about it.

You act like it's some huge deal

that I be brave,

huh, and all that kind of sh*t,

that I find out

who I... who I really am?

Okay. I won't anymore.

Maybe you just want

to hang out with people

who are into the same kind of

crazy sh*t that you like, huh?

What do you mean by that?

Nothing. I don't...

forget it.

But you said it, so...

Nat, please.

Can we just drop it?

No, I'm not going to.

You took something

that I told you privately

and you threw it back

in my face.

No, I did not.

You did. You just did.

I-I didn't mean "crazy."

But you said it.

Look, all right, I take it back.

I'm sorry.

Forget it.

No, but you meant it.

That's what you think

about what I do,

so that's why you said it.

No. Listen.

No, you listen.

You're a f***ing coward,

and you want to go and crawl

under some rock somewhere now,

thinking that will make it

all go away, but it won't.

You'll start finding ways

to go and sneak on the Internet

or buy some magazines

or go to places,

places where you can...

I don't know...

watch or something and...

the point is, les,

it's not gonna go away.

I know it 'cause I've been you.

I've been you, les,

and I know how it works, okay?

And I'm telling you

that some way or another,

this is gonna spin out of you,

and it's gonna hurt somebody

or a whole lot of somebodies

if you don't just face it

head on.

Nat...

Nat, all due respect,

what are you suggesting here?

That I track this person down

and have sex again?

See if I get off on it again?

I mean,

isn't that why we're here?

I...

I thought about it.

I thought about it

for a minute, but, I mean...

I mean, come on.

What... what am I actually...

what am I actually

supposed to do?

What if I like it?

What if I do like guys?

Or even other women?

What if I enjoy getting off

with other people?

What then, huh? What?

Well, at least you'll know.

What? Know what?

Who you are.

You know,

we'll find this Zorro person.

Zorro isn't... isn't a person.

I told you.

Whatever it is.

It's a club,

a-a place that I went to

when I was here last.

And I had a drink, and...

And that's all. That's all?

Well, you know what happened.

Yeah, yeah, I do.

And then I... when I woke up

and we were in the process

of landing here in...

in Albuquerque, and I thought...

it hit me... maybe this is...

this is supposed to happen

so that I could...

that I could finally...

finally get rid

of this... this...

I don't know... this feeling.

I understand.

I think about it all the time.

I get it, les. I do.

And it's not because

it was pleasurable or whatnot.

I mean, it was.

It's because... it's because

I did a really bad thing.

Says who?

Says the world, everybody,

many people,

people of my generation.

What I did is wrong

in the eyes of most...

most everybody else

in the world,

and that... that weighs on me.

It does.

And yet?

And yet I can't forget

that evening.

F***.

So, you still want to

go back to the hotel or...?

Yeah. I guess.

I don't know.

Hi. I'm working.

Hi.

No, I'm working.

That's not possible right now.

No.

I am wear...

I am wearing it, yes.

Promise.

I promise I'm wearing it.

No, I can't...

I can't take a picture.

But, Angie, don't hang up.

I just can't take a pic...

she hung up.

No.

No, nothing yet.

No, this thing

doesn't seem to be...

yep.

Yeah, so we might be stuck here

tonight,

which really stinks, you know?

It really...

yeah.

Yeah, because tomorrow

we're supposed to be in...

exactly, in Dallas,

and that's... what's that?

Yeah. Well, that's true.

Yes. No.

No. I've been here before,

so...

yeah, at least I know

some local restaurants

and stuff.

That's true, sweetie.

Yeah.

Well, probably just get a...

a nice meal or something,

go to bed early.

Mm-hmm.

No, my phone is working now.

Well, I don't know why, either.

It just is.

Yeah.

Well, we're on a higher floor.

No. No, we're not in a...

we're not in a room.

We're in some kind of...

some kind of lounge

or something like that.

Anyway, my phone's working.

Sometimes things like that

happen.

No, I don't think

it's a miracle.

No, I don't.

No.

I think it has more to do

with my carrier

than it does with Jesus.

Uh, there's...

I think I'm gonna go back...

Into town.

But we just got here.

I know.

I know, but...

Okay.

I need to. It's...

I get it.

All right.

Do you want me to come?

Oh, do what you want to do.

I want to come with you.

All right.

"Butch and Sundance," remember?

We have to protect

the ampersand.

Yeah. Yeah. Okay.

Let's do it.

And, uh...

Thanks.

You're welcome.

Thank you, and...

I-I don't think you're crazy.

And I don't care

what you think, so...

No worries.

All right.

Off we go.

You want to have them watch that

for you behind the desk?

That's all right.

You know

what's probably gonna come

of this whole thing, honestly?

We're gonna run all the way

back into town,

I'm gonna find this person

who I-I spent time with,

and she's gonna turn out

to be this...

this knockout... This hot girl.

And all that's gonna come

of this whole thing

is that I'm gonna feel bad

about what I've done

in a completely normal

and heterosexual way.

That's what's gonna happen.

I promise.

Bet you 50 bucks

that's what happens.

You watch.

Hey, buddy.

Seriously?

'Tis I. Hop in.

Does any of this look familiar?

Not to me.

I've only been here once.

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