Dorian Blues Page #5

the universe paid up.

I left Tiffany's that night

knowing that I'd never be straight...

...and that it was

time to tell everyone.

This is bad.

This is really bad.

You're actually going to do this.

So tell me, Dor...

'cause I honestly don't understand.

Where are you suddenly finding

the courage to do this?

I mean, to this day you

still haven't been able to...

...tell them about that golf club

you broke that summer.

I know.

- I may throw that in.

- He's going to go ballistic.

Maybe, but afterwards,

he'll know who I am.

OK, he doesn't care

who you are, Dorian!

He only cares who he is

and this will mean that...

...he's the father

of a homosexual.

And that's going to freak him out!

Well, I'm not going

to be here for it.

You know, some families

actually grow stronger...

...from this sort of thing.

Oh yeah, we're a really

good candidate for that.

You tell your news,

Dad will drink til he drops...

...and Mom will be up until

two o'clock in the morning...

...dusting knick-knacks and humming

to herself like a mental patient.

Yeah, we're really going

to grow stronger.

Don't you tell him I knew.

- I won't.

- I'm serious.

- I didn't know a thing about it.

- I heard you.

- I'm going to Walsh's.

- What's all the yelling about?

Nothing.

Where are my keys?

Wherever you left them.

You're not wearing a

a pink shirt, are you?

No, it's fuchsia.

Got a minute, dad?

Stupid, stupid,

stupid, stupid.

Idiot!

Son, you don't even know

the meaning of the word.

I don't know what

the word 'gay' means?

- I doubt it.

- Well, you're wrong.

- What's it mean?

- It means, I like men.

Not you, maybe,

but in general.

You hear the

anger there... Huh?

See that's the crux

to all of this.

You're so angry at me you'd do

anything to try and shock me.

Of course I'm angry at you,

because you've never had...

...anything but contempt for me.

Think this is gonna help?

- This isn't about you.

- I think it is.

Do you think I made this up?

No, I think you probably

worked yourself up...

...into half believing it too.

I more than half

believe it, Dad.

I know it.

You don't know horse

sh*t, you hear me?

You're so fogged up

in that head of yours...

...you don't know horse sh*t.

This is some fantasy you've

cooked up to feel eccentric.

Well I've got news for you.

There's a world of difference

between being eccentric...

...and being perverted.

Back to the drawing board.

Fantasy?

Before graduation I slept

with a guy at school.

Then congratulations...

...you have shocked me.

I didn't tell

you to shock you.

No, no.

Don't speak.

Don't open your mouth until

I ask you a direct question.

Is that clear?

- Is that clear?

- Yes sir.

Good.

Now what I want to know is,

who else have you told this to?

No one.

- None of your friends?

- No.

- Your mother?

- No.

- Your brother?

- No.

Yes.

I know about it,

Dad...

...everything.

You knew about this,

and you didn't tell me?

Well I would have, Dad,

if I knew you were...

...going to take it so well.

- This is funny.

- No, it isn't.

It's also not worth having

a heart attack over.

Dad, I'm still the same

person I always was.

Which was never so hot.

- Come on, Dad.

- Now hold it.

You should never

have involved him...

...he's at a very

impressionable age.

Oh, Jesus, Dad.

This does not affect

your precious N icky!

- I certainly hope not.

- Dad.

Oh, so that's

the bottom line.

You don't care if you have a

gay son as long as it's not him.

Don't tell me

what I care about.

Dad, will you

guys just relax?

- It's your problem.

- It's no big deal!

What isn't?

Being gay.

It isn't.

It's just, you know,

another way to go.

I never told him that, Dad.

- Get out.

- No, Dad.

- You don't live here any more.

- Fine.

- What the hell is going on?

- Get the hell out of here!

- What's going on?

- Dorian!

He's out of here,

it's his problem.

Just a second Dad.

Dad!

Get your hands off me!

What, are you

turning faggy too?

Is this really how

you're gonna move out?

Well, I would have

preferred a cake, but...

He's gonna cool off a

lot by tomorrow, Dor.

I'm not gonna be

here tomorrow, OK?

I just called the cab.

I'm going to Aunt Beth's in

five minutes and tomorrow...

I'm going down to school early.

And what if you're not

happy down in New York?

How could I not be

happy in New York?

New York's the greatest

city in the world.

You always say that...

...how do you know what the

greatest city in the world is?

The only other city

you've been to is Utica.

- What about mom?

- You fill her in, I'll call.

I don't want some sort

of weird scene now.

Do you want this, it's

yours but I use it.

Man, she's gonna

be heart-broken.

She'll be rolling pennies,

she won't even notice.

That's not fair.

You, you know

about fair, N ick?

Well why don't you,

favorite son...

quarterback king with

a big Dick to boot...

...tell me about fair.

And good luck here alone.

October 21 st.

Dear Nicky, was I ever

right about this city.

It's wonderful.

What did I always talk about?

Culture, museums, theater...

God, I've found

myself here, Nick.

And, others like me.

- You know what I don't get?

- Tell us.

OK. Why the pope rides around

in a bullet-proof car.

I just don't get that.

I mean, what is he

afraid of, eternal bliss?

That's Ellie.

She's opinionated,

lesbian, and Jewish.

Everything Dad looks

for in a woman.

The guy's Andrew.

Also gay, with

a big crush on me.

Dorian do you want

anything, on me?

No thanks.

I'm not interested,

but he persists.

- You sure, split an iced tea?

- No thanks.

Newspaper or a candy bar?

No thanks,

no thanks, no thanks.

You sure?

Andrew's odd,

but we love him...

...just as we all

love this city...

...which I can now say

from experience...

...is the greatest city in the world.

Dor.

December 3.

Dear Nick.

This is, without a doubt, the

most disgusting city in the world.

You see, you gotta

be here awhile...

...then you begin to see

the seams, the sadness...

...the filth, the loneliness...

Anyway, can't wait

for Christmas.

Family warmth and all that.

Dor.

Coats go right in the hall.

That's fine, just

dump them there.

Has he grown?

Look at this!

U h, ladies and gentleman,

could I have your attention please.

I, I, I just have a

little announcement.

Hello... Hey! Got a little

announcement to make.

As most of you are aware, N icky

has been applying to some colleges...

...hoping that one of them might

let him play a little football.

At what level, we

could only hope...

...and whether they would kick

in a little tuition money...

...we could only dream.

We received a little

letter here this morning.

The thrust of which says that

my son, my flesh and blood...

...will be playing

quarterback this fall...

...on a full scholarship at

Syracuse U niversity, division 1!

All right!

Come on up here, son!

No get up here, come

here, give me your hand.

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