Eddie Page #3

- Come on, man. Watch your language.

- Yo, you'd better back off.

Patton, I'm not warning you again.

- Ivan make basket.

- Yes, yes!

- Excuse me, Coach. I'd look for Jamal.

- Yeah, right.

Hey, logo-head, what are you lookin' at?

Get in the game, will ya?

She used my tickets

for her divorce lawyer.

- You mind gettin' in the game here?

- Hey!

Play ball.

Okay. All right, you guys.

Let's go!

[ Zimmer ] Let's go.

Let's go. Let's go.

Yeah!

Go, Knicks!

- [ Eric ] This is basketball, right?

- Let the torture begin.

[ Man ] Look at this!

He's going to-- Challenge him!

Don't watch him shoot!

Ohh--

Right this way, Mr. Burgess.

This is your owner's box.

We can have this redecorated

any way you'd like, of course.

[ Fans Shouting, Cheering ]

This'll do for now.

Hey, get it together

with the defense, Patton!

[ Man ] Bad defense!

[ Eddie ] No, don't take on

all four, Patton! Don't do it!

[ Man ] Come on, get with it!

- Back!

- Block him, block him!

Tonight's attendance figures,

Mr. Burgess.

I don't need to see the numbers.

I know empty when I see it.

Jamal Duncan now at the foul line...

and wearing his shoe logo

in his hair.

Let's see, he's shooting 55 percent

from the free throw line.

We'll see if it helps.

[ Scattered Groans, Applause ]

[ Eddie ] Bailey!

What's the matter with you?

Hey, Bailey!

Open up your eyes!

If Duncan can't make his free throws and

won't get back on defense, sit him down!

Putz!

[ Fans Groaning, Hooting ]

She gets louder every year.

Let's stack the deck

a little, shall we?

- Say "freaky girl"

- Freaky girl

- Say "sexy girl"

- Sexy girl

- [ Continues ]

- Well, the first half

has mercifully ended...

for Coach John Bailey's

New York Knicks.

Unless he can get Stacy Patton

to look for his teammates...

it does not look good

for this young team.

Here's the, uh, honorary coach list

for tonight.

section 21, row four, seat nine...

and section 221, row "R," seat 15.

- It's you!

- Ohhh! Ohh!

Ohh! Wait a minute!

Wait! Oh, my God!

[ Echoing ] Wait! Wait!

Oh, it's me! I won!

Oh, wait a minute!

Wait, wait!

Whoo! I won!

I told you!

Remember, anyone who

makes the free throw...

gets to be honorary coach

for the second half.

Wait, wait! Don't start without me!

I'm comin'!

Hey! Hey! Hey!

Hey! Move, man!

Hey!

[ Panting ]

The ticket.

I got my ticket.

Move.

I got the ticket.

[ Continues Panting ]

Oh, sh*t. Excuse me.

[ P.A. Announcer ]

Our first shooter tonight...

is 13-year-old Tracy Hogan

from Flatbush.

[ Panting ] I had to come from--

Never mind.

I got the ticket, man!

Stand here and shoot

for the hoop, okay?

- [ Fans Groan ]

- [ P.A. Announcer ] Ow! Well, nice try.

- Let's give Tracy a hand!

- [ Murmuring ] Yeah, Tracy.

- Our next shooter is 31-year-old

Sheldon Leonard from Astoria.

- Shoot for the hoop.

[ Fans Applauding, Cheering ]

Whoo!

[ P.A. Announcer ]

A serious contender, folks.

Come on, man, you ain't no Globetrotter.

Shoot the ball!

- [ Loud Cough ]

- [ Fans Groan ]

- [ P.A. Announcer ] Just a bit outside!

[ Applause ]

I got it, I got it,

I got it. Hey!

[ All Cheering ]

Eddie! Eddie!

[ Chanting, Clapping ]

Eddie! Eddie!

Wow.

[ P.A. Announcer ] She seems to have her

own cheering section up there in 221.

- It just doesn't get

any better than this. God!

- Eddie! Eddie!

[ P.A. Announcer ]

Everybody's ready.

[ Fans Shouting, Hooting ]

Perhaps tonight?

- [ Woman ] You got it, girl!

- [ Man ] Come on!

- Shoot it! Shoot it!

- Shoot the damn ball!

- [ Cheering ]

- [ P.A. Announcer ]

Guess what-- we have a winner!

We have an honorary coach tonight!

Bring it on!

The honorary coach!

Yes, I think I got it! Yes, I think

I got it, 'cause I know I did!

[ P.A. Announcer ] Tonight's

honorary coach, Edwina Franklin!

[ Booing ]

[ Continues ]

In the house!

Yeah. Oh!

Hi.

- Hey.

- How y'all doin'?

No, no, no, no, no, no.

- Hey, get rid of her.

- [ Laughs ]

Check it out, baby.

Oooh-oooh-ooh!

Oooh-ooh-hoo! Whoo!

- Sit down and shut up.

- What?

- Sit down and shut up.

- All right, all right.

[ Continues ]

Oh. Sorry.

[ Chuckles ]

Whoo.

- No. Go back and sit down.

- I'm not--

- Sit! Sit!

- I'm-- All right.

[ Continues ]

[ Players Talking, Shouting ]

All right, screen!

Screen! Get through!

Hold on! Wait!

See, you gotta wait!

Yeah, Vlade, yeah!

All right!

- Foul!

- Everybody, get back!

- Pick it up, pick it up.

- Move! Hey-- Hey, Elvis! Move!

Hey, you with the $1.99

rug on your head, would you

get out of my way, please?

- Yeah, move.

- [ Groans ]

- Ohh!

- Oh! Excuse me!

- It just don't get no better

than that. He is cute.

- Right on.

Oh-ho, yeah!

- [ Grunts ]

- Oh, good block, Vlade!

Get up, get up, get up!

- [ Fans Booing ]

- Patton--

Come on, move it, move it.

Look at the guys. They're missi--

[ Player ] Screen, screen!

Get through!

By yourself!

Ivan, by yourself!

- Plant your feet, baby. Plant your feet!

- [ Whistle Blows ]

- Good call!

- Yeah! Blocking!

What you talkin' about? What is wrong

with you? What, you Helen Keller?

- You blind, brother!

- What are you doin'?

White, blocking!

Zero-zero!

- Bad call! Bad call!

- Bad call!

- Worse than your pants,

that's how bad the call was.

- [ Blows Whistle ]

- That's a technical!

- No! She's just a fan!

She's a fan, Dave, please!

But she's on your bench. You either

shut her up or get her outta here.

- Delighted. Right this way, ma'am.

- No. Come on, Bailey, no.

- No, no, no! Hey, don't!

- [ Fans Booing ]

Hey, don't! It's all right!

Hey, man!

[ Shouting, Booing Continues ]

Now, what the hell

is Bailey doing?

Look at her. She's as good as gold.

The fans love her. Look at that.

- [ Crowd Chanting "Eddie"]

- The crowd is going crazy...

as Coach John Bailey is having

Honorary Coach Eddie Franklin

ejected from the garden!

[ Chanting Continues ]

- See you tomorrow night, Eddie.

- Okay.

Go for the open man. What are you doin'?

Why don't you listen?

Hit the open man!

Hit him!

- [ Yelling, Shouting ]

- Go back, go back!

All right, all right,

all right, let's go.

He's goin' that way!

There's the basket! Go! Go!

Ah! Ah! Hey!

Where you goin', man?

Y'all are supposed to be over here!

Come on!

Look, Eddie, they can't even get

the ball! Let me go in. One play!

[ Stuttering ]

- Yes! Yes!

- [ Whistle Blows ]

Eddie! Eddie!

What in the hell's the idea of sittin'

my boy for the entire game?

Excuse us for a second.

Listen, don't ever come up on me

like that again in front of children.

- What's the matter with you?

- Nothing's the matter with me.

- He's been sittin' there

for the entire game.

- The boy got a "D" in English.

- What's that got to do

with him playin' ball?

- A lot.

But your first question should've been,

"Why'd he get the 'D' in English?"

You need to start paying attention

to him in school...

or you're gonna be watching him

in court instead of on the court.

- Okay?

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