Elf Page #7

What's more vulnerable than a peach?

What, uh, what do we do?

I think we should go with the first pitch... it's genius.

Uh, how much time we got?

We got, like, 45 minutes. Well, come on, let's, uh,

Try to get a storyboard or something ready.

Come on, let's do it. Just try.

No, you can't sit down and get a storyboard ready.

Go and get a storyboard ready.

Oh, boy! Go.

"I'm sorry I ruined your lives

"And crammed 11 cookies into the vcr.

"I don't belong here. I don't belong anywhere.

I'll never forget you. Love, buddy."

God...

Hey, buddy.

Buddy?

As you know, we need a big launch fast

To get the company back on track.

So, I think I speak for my fellow board members

When I say... this better be good.

Before I get into the story, uh,

Let me start with the cover, okay?

Now, just picture this...

Dad! I gotta talk to you.

Walter:
Michael, what is it?

Buddy ran away.

What? He... he left a note.

I'm scared, dad, he's gone.

Uh, let me just finish this meeting,

And then, um, we'll figure it out, okay?

Figure out what? Buddy cares about everybody.

All you care about is yourself.

Hey, Michael.

Wait.

We're gonna have to reschedule this, uh, Mr. Greenway.

We don't have time to reschedule.

I wanna hear the damn thing now.

Son, you'll have to wait.

No, d-don't tell my kid what to do, uh...

Can't... can't we do this another time, Mr. Greenway?

I flew in just to hear this pitch,

And I intend to.

It's gonna have to wait.

If you wanna keep your job, Hobbs,

You will pitch me this book right now.

Well... up yours.

Yeah, up yours. Hey.

Hobbs... Hobbs!

Hobbs, you walk out of here,

And... and you're finished at greenway!

You're finished!

I don't belong anywhere.

Buddy!

Buddy!

Buddy, where are you?!

Prancer, pull! Come on! Come on!

Vixen, up, up!

Santa?

Come on, you can do it.

Pull up! Pull up!

Dad! What?

Michael, where you going?

Michael!

Santa.

Back off, slick. You'll scare the deer.

Buddy, is that you?

Are you okay?

Boy, am I glad to see you.

The Claus meter suddenly just dropped down to zero.

There's just no Christmas spirit anymore.

And then the strain was too Much...

The engine broke free of her mounts.

I need an elf's help.

I... I'm not an elf, Santa.

I... I can't do anything right.

Buddy, you're more of an elf than anyone I ever met,

And the only one who I would want

Working on my sleigh tonight.

Really? Really.

Will you fix it for me, buddy?

I'll try. Papa taught me how.

You gotta find it first.

It dropped off the sleigh back over there a ways.

The engine? The engine, yeah.

Go, buddy. Go, Mr. Elf!

[Chuckles]

I'm standing here outside central park

Where it is unclear exactly what has happened.

What we do know is that authorities

Have closed the park

And are in the process of clearing it.

The only thing that people can seem to agree on here

Is that they saw something fall from the sky.

I've got an eyewitness with me

Who claims to have seen the whole thing firsthand.

What did you actually see?

You know, I was walking around and I saw this thing,

And my daughter actually pointed it out to me.

Oh, your daughter saw it?

Sweetheart, can you tell me

What you saw falling out of the sky?

It was Santa's sleigh!

[News woman chuckles]

Santa's sleigh, well, there you have it.

Santa's in Manhattan.

Sorry to interrupt your first big news story, charlotte,

But New York one has just received

Some exclusive amateur news footage

That you just might Anna follow up on.

There seems to be a strange man dressed as an elf

Wandering through central park.

Now, I don't know if this is the kind of hard-hitting news

You're used to covering in buffalo, charlotte,

Oh, my god. But here at New York one,

News is top priority.

What the heck...?

Hey!

You found it. Buddy!

I need to tell you something.

No, no. Buddy, there's something

I have to tell you right now.

Um, I didn't mean anything I said back there, not word.

I know you may be a little, um, um...

Uh, chemically imbalanced,

But you've been right about a lot of things.

I... I don't want you to leave.

You're my son, and I... love you.

Uh, buddy, uh...

What was it you wanted to tell me?

Oh, right. Come with me.

Right. Come on.

I'm herewith another eyewitness

Who has his own version of what happened.

Sir, what did you see?

I think you're great, charlotte.

Uh, I saw something fall from the sky

Right into the middle of central park.

I mean, you're a great news lady.

Thank you.

Could you tell me a bit more?

About what you saw fall from the sky?

Yeah, yeah. Your eyes tell the story,

That's what I love about you. You've got a great mouth.

The thing just dropped in the middle of central park.

It was amazing, and everybody's, like, going crazy.

Dick, uh, according to authorities,

The area has been cleared.

Only the central park rangers now remain in the park.

These forces are highly trained,

But rarely see action.

Some have accused them of being too gung ho

When called into duty,

And their controversial crowd control tactics

At the Simon and Garfunkel concert in '85

Are still under investigation.

I knew you'd find it, Mr. Elf!

Slap it on real quick, we've got to get going.

That ta boy.

[Chuckles]

So, uh... you're, uh...

Santa Claus. Right.

Would you mind taking this to your firstborn?

Sure.

Um, uh, and my firstborn, he's an elf?

Yes. Actually, I'm adopted.

Uh, Michael, would you open this hatch for me, please?

That ta boy, thank you.

So, you're really Santa Claus?

You never can tell, kid.

Tell me, Michael,

What do you want for Christmas?

I wanted a skateboard.

Oh, not just skateboard.

Arealhuf board. Looked here.

Looked here...

How do you like them apples?

Go look and see.

Whoa.

What happened?

You made my sleigh fly.

What do you mean?

Well, before the turbine days,

This baby used to run solely on Christmas spirit.

You believed in me. You made my sleigh fly.

Hold it... if you're really Santa Claus,

Then we can just get some news cameras in here,

And everyone will believe in you,

Then your sleigh will fly, right?

Christmas spirit is about believing, not seeing.

If the whole world saw me, all would be lost.

The paparazzi have been trying to nail me for years.

[Horse whinnies]

Hey, look!

[Horse whinnies]

Oh, no.

It's the central park rangers.

[Horses whinny]

Dad, Michael... I got a plan.

Santa:
Whoa, wait! Wait, Michael... my list!

You bring that list back right now, you hear me?!

Come on, give me your hat and coat.

Mrs. Claus made them for me.

Hey! Hey, here I am!

Ho ho ho!

Hey, ho ho ho! Hey! Hey!

Excuse me. Thank you. Excuse me.

So the authorities have not discovered

Any reindeer in the park?

No, no reindeer. Sleigh bells?

No, no sleigh bells, either.

Elves? Excuse me, please.

None of that, we really just need everyone...

It's him, it's the real Santa!

His sleigh won't fly,' cause nobody believes in him!

Charlotte:
Did you see something in the park?

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