Evan Almighty Page #3

I've got all eternity:

Hey:
You okay, young man?

What happened?

You fainted:

Dropped like a leaf

during the Pledge of Allegiance:

Chuck Long,

Resources Committee Chairman:

Oh:
Oh: Congressman Long: Yes:

Oh, I'm so sorry about:::

Forget it! Many a man's been humbled

by his first day in Congress:

So, how'd you like that office?

Oh, it was great: Yes: Thank you, sir:

Not bad for a freshman dorm room, huh?

So here's the skinny:

I'm bringing you into my land use bill

because you strike me as the type of guy

who knows how to hit the ground running:

Yes, sir:
I read the bill, and it's great:

I just had a few questions:

Hey, I wrote the thing

and I have a few questions:

We'll get to the questions later:

So, you with us?

Yes, sir:
I'm in:

Wonderful!

I'll need you to put that into

a letter of intent,

as soon as you're feeling up to it,

of course:
You get yourself better:

Enjoy that office:

Thank you, sir:

He's exhausted from reading that bill:

I got woozy from just carrying it:

Evan, sit down:

Evan, what happened to you?

You can't faint during the Pledge

of Allegiance:
It's un-American:

Oh, good:
The doctor's here:

Say "ah:
"

Just go home, get some rest

and start on that ark: You hear me?

You're right on time:

Long just called: He's on his way with the

powers that be:
Who are they, Gene? Talk:

Congressman Jim Dodd,

head of Ways and Means:

But don't worry, sir,

he's definitely not "way mean:"

That's speculation:

I don't know him personally:::

That's too much, Gene: Who else?

Congressman Richard Stamp,

head of Commerce,

and Bob Hughes is Transportation:

I have a draft of your support letter:

Sounds like a plan:

Are you all right?

I'm good:

You sure you're good? Okay:

Good morning, chief:

Good morning, Rita:

Are you okay?

I'm fine:

You don't look so good:

That's what I said:

You're all jumpy: Are you on that Fen-Phen?

Guys, I'm fine:
I'll be inside:

No, no, no, no:

No:
Okay: No, no: No: No, no: No:

No, no, no:
Oh, my gosh!

Guys! No, no! Get out! Get out! Oh, my hair!

Gentlemen, welcome:

What an honor to have you here:

I'm Marty Stringer:

I'm Congressman Baxter's chief of staff:

This is Rita Daniels, his executive assistant:

: Are you ready, sir?

Just a minute:
No, no, no, no:

Dirty, dirty, dirty! Big one!

Baxter's only a freshman, sir, but I think

you'll find he is locked and loaded:

Good:
Maybe this young stud can help me

get these old mares on board:

Oh, you'll be impressed:

Gentlemen, good to see you:

Do you want to explain yourself,

Congressman? What is going on?

Oh, these

are birds:

What are they doing here?

How did they get in here?

Well, that is an excellent question:

And my response to said question is,

they are trained

aviaries, sir:

Let me make you see

what I'm talking about:

I can make any sort of movement,

and they will not get off!

Do you have a point, Congressman?

Hey, guys, what's the point?

What's my point?

I'll tell you:

The point is

that man

needs to dominate creatures

and, ultimately, man must

dictate what happens in this country:

God bless America:

I couldn't agree more:

You have got to be kidding me:

No, of course not:

We lost a huge project last year

because of the red-headed woodpecker:

Those environmentalists got so up in arms

over the potential disappearance

of one stupid bird:::

Yeah, birds are stupid sometimes:

:::we lost over $25 million in business:

I see where you're going with this,

Congressman:
Good work!

Your little display has obviously

hit a chord:
Gentlemen:

From now on, let's keep the surprises

to a maximum of, say, none: Understood?

Yes, sir:
Absolutely, sir:

Evan, that was brilliant: Risky, but brilliant:

What the:
::

I'll tell you one thing, these birds had

a nice big meal before they flew in here:

You want me to get my BB gun?

You know what I want you to do?

I want you to open the door:

Open the door?

Just open the door!

Close the door after I leave! Just do it!

Okay:

One, two, three!

Man, if I get the bird flu,

he is paying for my medical bills!

Sheep!

Oh, no:

Oh, gosh:

Go, go, go! Get out!

Okay:
No:

No:
No:

I'm not doing this: It's insane!

No!

Enough already!

See, if you had an ark,

you'd have a place to put them all:

Why are you doing this? Why me?

It's not time yet: Go on: Go on:

Yeah, go on:

So how about it?

Feel like living on the edge?

Beautiful, isn't it?

I remember creating this valley:

Notice how the mountains line up

east to west:

That's so there'd be lots of sunshine:

Where are we?

Don't recognize it, eh?

No:

This is where you live, son:

This is Prestige Crest:

I wanted you to see the original design:

So, you're really him, aren't you?

You want more proof? I haven't done

the pillar of salt thing in a while:

That's all right: I believe you: I just:::

I don't understand why you chose me:

You want to change the world, son:

So do I:

What? Well, why an ark?

I mean, that's like flood territory:

You wouldn't do that again:

You wouldn't do that: Would you do that?

Let's just say that whatever I do,

I do because I love you:

Well, then you have to understand

that this whole building-an-ark thing

is really not part of my plans here:

I need to settle into my house:

I need to make a good impression at work:

What?

Your plans:
That's just:::

What are you talking:::

We're talking about an ark, right?

I mean, an ark?

An ark is huge!

I don't even know where I would begin!

Well, I hear that a lot:

People want to change the world,

don't know how to begin:

You want to know

how to change the world, son?

One act of random kindness at a time:

Build the ark:

I'll tell you what: You build it, I'll fill it:

And if anybody asks,

tell them a flood's coming:

Oh, and you might need this:

Well, okay:
Okay, so what do I do?

I grab the wood and:::

Well, okay:

You know, that's just cruel:

Do you see him?

I don't see him:

"Building an Ark the Old-Fashioned Way:"

"God is the creator of

the Heavens and the Earth:

"He lives in all things and has over

six billion seven hundred million children:"

Honey? You okay?

You need something?

No, nothing:
Just dropped something:

Okay:
Okay:

Yeah:

There we go:
Okay:

Come on:
I mean, a beard?

A beard's so dirty:

Gross!

::packing, so it would really help me

out if you would:::

Good morning:

Hey, hey, hey, good morning:

Wow:

What's with the scruffle, mountain man?

Oh, well, you know, I figured it was

a weekend, and I thought:::

What?

Honey, did I miss something?

How long have you been growing that?

I'll get the door!

Congratulations!

What are you talking about?

The lots:
You bought the lots next door!

Hello!

Oh:
::

And pulling the down payment out of

your home equity? Very gutsy move:

I didn't do that, did I?

You sure did:
So what's your plan?

What are you gonna do?

Turn them for a quick profit?

Build them out on spec?

Who wants champagne? Hip, hip hooray!

You bought eight lots?

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