Fat Albert Page #2

I knew it!

You do have a problem.

- Now all we gotta do is get you some friends.

- No. No. Absolutely not.

You know who you're talkin' to?

Fat Albert talk,

people--people listen.

Hey, look. Nobody is talking to anyone,

or you're not going anywhere.

Now, come on. This is my last class,

and I don't want to be late.

I talked it over with my boys,

and we want a buck-buck rematch.

- Uh, you do?

- Yeah.

We're gonna be the buck-buck

champions of the world.

- You can't be.

- Why not?

Fat Albert and the guys

aren't here right now.

You mean you're here

by yourself?

- You know what that means, don't you?

- No.

It means that me and my boys

are gonna take over the junkyard!

You can't do that!

This is Fat Albert's junkyard!

Oh, yeah? Well, I don't see

Fat Albert anywhere.

Help! Help!

Good afternoon, class.

Good afternoon, Mrs. Forchick.

Since there's a three-day

weekend coming-- Oh, yes, Doris.

Um, I have some...

visitors here with me.

And I didn't think you'd mind

if they audited the class.

All right, kids.

Come on. Find a seat.

Hello. How you doin'?

Hello.

Nice clothes.

Name's Darren.

- What's that on your head?

- It's my hat.

- Why don't you take it off?

- I have no face.

- Right.

- Answer questions one, four, seven and nine.

- What's with that guy? - I ba do badoby,

but myba nameba iba M-Mushmouth.

And you?

And now why don't we begin by having

your friends introduce themselves?

Oh, all right.

Well, I'm Fat Albert.

- Doris says you're visiting.

Where is it that you live? - North Philly.

What? Was that funny?

Yes. It is.

Considering the fact that

you're in North Philadelphia...

and therefore are visiting North

Philadelphia from North Philadelphia.

Is there something more

you want to say, Albert?

Oh, uh, yes. We're here

because Doris has a problem.

- Oh, God.

- Yes, she doesn't have any friends.

So we came here to tell everybody

to be her friend.

That's very nice.

All right, kids. Power up.

Log on and access the Internet.

- Yes. Can I help you?

- Uh, what is this?

Uh, why don't we put those down?

Two more laps.

Well, that was one of the more

humiliating experiences of my life.

Look, I don't have friends

because I don't want friends.

So if you guys would stop trying to help

me, I would greatly appreciate it.

Hey, hey, hey!

You run track?

Yeah, I do. My grandpa used to

run track for Temple.

It was important to him,

so I run.

- Well, are you fast?

- No, I'm not.

- I'm lucky just to finish.

- Hey, hey, hey. Don't think that way.

I'm sure you could win.

And I'll be here to cheer you on.

- I'll see you next class.

- Okay.

- Bye.

- Who is that?

Oh, that's my sister Lauri.

Well, not really my "sister" sister.

My foster sister.

My family took her in last year.

Well, I'm gonna go get ready.

You guys just stay put. Don't walk.

Don't talk. Don't do anything.

And I do not have a problem.

Hey, Fat Albert.

You sick or somethin'?

I'm going to go talk

to Doris's sister.

You know,

about Doris's problem.

- Is he all right?

- I don't know.

- I know you don't know. I wasn't talking to you.

- I wasn't talking to you.

- Well, who--

- Guys, guys!

Hey, Dani, can i

ask you something?

I am listening!

- These girls are

going to bust out

"Holla back Girl".

- That's the great idea!

You should tell the others.

- Hey, Brittany.

Let's have a girls night out!

Sounds like a plan?

Claire, Ashlynn, and Gabby,

are you all ready?

Yes.

# A few times are around the track #

# That's not gonna happen

# like that #

# I ain't no hollaback girl #

# I ain't no hollaback girl #

# A few times are around the track #

# That's not gonna happen

# like that #

# Cuz I ain't no hollaback girl #

# I ain't no hollaback girl #

Look at that, Charles.

You see that?

That's so right, Big Biggie!

I'm tired.

I need to go home and sleep.

Hey, Charles.

Here's the one and only

big sized pizza.

I don't know, Grovie.

That's the reason to give

a small pizza.

But it's still too big.

Give me pizza half the sized

of a medium pizza.

Yes, sir.

Let's make a good working here.

Give me pizza half the sized

of a medium pizza.

Boy!

If a real word fusses up

one more time,

I'm going to classic-themed

McDonald's.

He certainly won't work

in here.

There, Charles.

I just wanna get a tip.

You're not having a tip.

No, sir.

I wanna give you tip,

because I bought you the food.

You are not gonna get me a tip,

because i'm not going to eat this.

Take it back.

I'm going to classic-themed

MacDonald's.

No no no no no no, sir.

Please come back.

I didn't mean to fail.

The customer's always right.

Let me go.

Please, sir.

Don't leave.

I just wanna say sorry for

failing orders all the years.

Just tell me what you want!

I'll never go to Trolley's

and i'm telling you again.

And that is final!

Now let me go!

Wait a minute!

I wanna ask you something?

Do you work at Pizza Hut?

Actually, Charles, yes I do.

I worked on pizzas down the corner.

Why not?

Oh, nothing.

Now let me go!

No no no.

Please don't leave.

I can give you the money

whatever you get a discount

or prices for what---.

- ABC News now!

I'm Karen Chase.

The cheerleaders are gonna

do the concert night.

Reporters say the girls

are gonna be more

interesting for the show.

According the MTV,

we have a live show

scheduled two months away.

This is the first show for Fat Albert

and the crew.

You're Lauri.

Yeah. Who are you?

I'm Fat Albert.

Well, Albert,

is there something you want?

Wait. Don't rub it.

Oh, boy. That be

some nice budda-bup.

You watch your mouth.

That better?

- Yeah.

- My mother showed me how to do that.

She blew in his eye.

Uh, what does that mean?

- I don't know.

- I know you don't know.

Guys, guys, guys!

So--

Doris tells me that you two are sisters.

I mean, not real sisters,

but foster sisters.

Man, there's no way I'm letting

that fat kid get over on Lauri.

See, Doris has this problem

where I think that--

Albert--

I see you two have met.

He's an athlete, Arthur. Look.

- Yo. You sure, Reginald?

- I'll talk to you later, Lauri.

I guess he came

to try out for the track team.

I wonder what event, uh,

he could participate in.

- The high hurdle.

- Yo, the belly roll.

How about the 440?

440? Do you want to

race me, beefy boy?

You don't want to

race Fat Albert.

Fat Albert?

- Yeah he's fat, but he's fast.

- Fabby but fabba.

Okay. Well, let's see

how fast you really are.

- I already know how fast I am.

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