Fired Up Page #3

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We like driving

We, we like driving

- We are eating

- We, we are eating

We are driving again

We are driving

We are driving again

We are driving

- How long does this go on for?

- The whole way.

Just wait till their cycles match up.

You'll miss these days.

We're gonna miss

Mookie's dad's house.

Oh, buddy, we are not missing

Mookie's dad's house.

Yeah.

This thing is three weeks long.

Not for us, it isn't. We hook up

like maniacs, we bail in two.

That's probably gonna piss

some people off.

To make an omelet,

you gotta break some eggs.

Grated cheese, slice some mushrooms,

salt, pepper, don't over-beat.

We are driving again

We are driving

We are driving again

We are driving

We are driving again

We are driving

Sorry.

I should say so, handsy.

At least buy me dinner first.

Very funny.

All right, now you're just

taking advantage of me.

We are here

We, we are here

I think we made a big mistake.

We may have screwed the pooch

on this one.

Or maybe the pooch

is gonna screw us.

Sweet Mary in a D-cup.

I think our bus crashed

and we're in heaven.

No. We would've heard:

"We are crashing

We, we are crashing"

Let's go see how warm the water is.

- Hi. Do I know you?

- I don't think so.

Well, I'm Nick. I'm new this year.

Maybe you could show me around.

- Who's this?

- Nick. He's new this year.

This is Shawn, also new,

needs showing around.

- If it's not too much trouble.

- You gotta check in.

Okay, coming.

It was very nice meeting you.

Hope we see you around.

I'll put a bookmark between you.

That way we know where we left off.

Hi. What squad are you on?

Diora. I believe that's Italiano

for "beautiful princess. "

- No.

- Well, it should be.

- I'm calling the dictionary people.

- What squad are you on?

The Tigers, Gerald R. Ford High.

Below-average president,

above-average student body.

So, what are you doing later?

Not you.

What about accents?

You like Aussies?

You wanna wear my leather hat?

Mascots, I'll be checking you in

in 10 minutes at the mascot table.

- Why are you still here?

- You like canopy beds?

The last bus from Bitchville

just pulled in.

- Who's that?

- The Panthers.

They always come in first

and they don't let anyone forget it.

You guys came back.

I think that's so brave.

I just hope one day

there's a special cheer camp...

...where squads like yours

really have a shot.

- Shut up.

- Truth hurts.

- Your face is gonna hurt.

- Does your face hurt...

- ... when you stuff it with pie?

- You wish you had my body image.

I'm healthy. Unlike you, Skeletor.

We're a different team this year,

Gwyneth.

Meet our new squad members.

I'm Nick. This is Shawn.

Hi. Great to meet you.

So you got a little sausage

in your soup this year. BFD.

- See you on the cheer field.

- It's that big chunk of grass...

...you come in last on, every year.

Panthers out.

Panthers out?

What are they, a knife gang?

- God, I hate them.

- I think they're kind of cool.

I'm just saying.

Hey. I'm Nick. This is Shawn.

I'm Brewster.

Not my real name.

My parents named me Jack.

Jack, so strong, so masculine.

We get it. You wanted a boy.

My name's Jack. I punch bad guys,

and I kiss girls.

- Save it.

- Okay.

Now, just a quick FY informacin,

I'm kind of a neat freak...

...so we'll get along great if you

just keep your area clean.

And by "area," you mean?

- Your bunks.

- Okay.

I can't stand clutter.

That's why we left Calcutta.

Well, that and my dad

took a job with United Airlines.

Your jobs aren't just

going over there, sailor.

Some of us are coming over here.

The world is flat like a son of a b*tch.

You're giving us a lot to process here.

Hey, what's up, guys? I'm Adam.

What's up, man?

Hey, I'm Nick. This is Shawn.

Well, welcome, welcome.

- Is that your girlfriend?

- Yeah.

That's Jody. We've been cheering

together since we were 5.

So you take this seriously?

I wanna be the first in my family to

go to college on a cheer scholarship.

Good luck, man.

I hope you break the cycle.

- Thanks, man.

- Cool.

What's up, Eagle?

Mascots don't talk. They just gesture.

- Even in their bunks?

- The whole time, baby girl.

It's total immersion.

Hey. Can someone

help me with my stuff?

I got a huge bag of footballs,

beer, Xbox games.

Let's get this party started.

Finally, a kindred spirit.

I'm Nick. This is Shawn.

- I'm Downey.

- What's up? Nice to meet you.

Downey. Downey. All right,

so break it down for us.

How great is this place?

- It's sick, dude.

- Sweet. Right there.

The coaches are amazing. Your

cheering's gonna be off the charts.

My cheering's gonna be off the charts.

I guess that's a good thing.

What about the ladies?

Tell me about the ladies.

Oh, yeah, totally.

Their cheering gets better too.

They see real progress.

What the...?

Wow, look at them all, dude. In rows.

It's like the hot-chick produce aisle.

I don't know where to start.

Do we go from tall to short

or blond to redhead?

Maybe just iPod-shuffle mode.

This is why I'd never wanna

be president. Too many decisions.

Don't worry,

I don't think that's in the cards.

You say that now, but George W.

was a cheerleader at Yale.

He never thought

he'd be president...

...snorting coke through his skull and

bones at a New Haven titty bar.

You just never know, Shawnzy.

And that is what makes America great.

Any idiot can be president.

- Let's hear some noise over here!

- Noise over here!

- Let's hear some noise over here!

- Noise over here!

- Are you fired up?

- We're fired up!

- Are you fired up?

- We're fired up!

- How do you spell "fired up"?

- F-U!

Not really.

- How do you spell "fired up"?

- F-U!

- What's that spell?

- Fired up!

- Not really that way either.

- Nope.

Damn straight. F-U.

You're at university now.

- Fired Up University.

- This is awesome.

Cheer college, my friends. None

of this high school stuff for you.

You got three weeks. We're gonna

take it right to the top to F-U.

- F-U!

- F-U!

Howdy do? My name is Coach Keith.

I'm the skipper of this spirit ship.

As many of you know, I was

the very first male cheerleader ever...

...to compete at the Nationals.

I was born cheering.

My mother swears

the first thing out of her what's-it...

...was a little pair of baby hands

doing spirit fingers.

That's a joke, but it really happened.

It is now my absolute pleasure...

...to introduce to you

your head counselor...

...and my super-sexy handsome wife,

Diora. Let's bring her out here.

- What? Did he say wife?

- No, he couldn't have.

Welcome, everyone.

For the next three weeks, you'll train

with me and the other coaches...

...and then compete in a tournament...

...with the top teams going on

to the State Finals.

So that would be the Panthers

and two other teams.

- Oh, me, me, me.

- Yes, ma'am, right here.

I heard that there was this really hard

move called the Fountain of Troy...

...that some team did at the Worlds.

Are we gonna learn that?

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