Flower Page #3

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I always thought

rats were gross.

Rats are like the most

misunderstood creatures

on earth, okay?

They get blamed

for tons of sh*t,

like the plague,

which wasn't even their fault.

Gerbils are the ones that

are actually sketchy as f***.

Wanna go eat some real food?

-Yeah.

-Mm-hm.

-Yeah.

Cool sunglasses.

I like them.

Let's go.

Hi.

Hey.

Where you guys going?

-To go buy some crack.

You know, throw it down.

It's okay. It's okay.

They're not buying drugs, Bob.

-Just let them hang out.

-No, I get the joke.

Oh, my God.

Going to town on that thing,

aren't you! Whoa!

This is like

the first real food

I have had in months.

Don't tell Sherm.

Glad to see you happy, though.

So my therapist says that,

I have a lot of anxiety issues.

Mm-hm.

I get angry a lot.

So, food kinda just

calms me down and makes me

think less of those situations

that I get anxious over.

Sorry I've been

such a rude b*tch lately.

Never really had

a brother before.

I don't know

how to act around you.

Also, you and Sherm

are like, in my space and sh*t,

and I don't really

want you guys there.

I mean, I've never had a sister

who tried to blow me before,

so the feeling's sort of mutual.

Offer still stands, by the way.

I'm trying to pretend

like that never happened.

Dude, you need to loosen up.

I'm serious.

I'm like the dick whisperer.

-I'm extremely gifted.

So you don't mind doing it

to guys who you don't know.

-No.

A dick is just like

a thumb without a fingernail,

if you really think about it.

Aren't you worried

about diseases or--

-No, I'm not.

-Aren't you worried about

people calling you a slut.

I don't care what

other people think about me.

Why you looking

at me like that?

It's not like

I f*** these dudes.

-Yeah.

If a dude goes around

eating a bunch of p*ssy,

nobody gives a f***.

Nobody calls him a slut.

Called feminism.

Yeah, no, I get that.

I understand that.

Besides, dude, it's better

for you than eating burgers

and popping pills all day.

I don't pop pills anymore.

When I did, it was the kind

that suppressed your appetite,

not make you eat more.

So are they gonna

send you to fat camp next?

Oh, they tried to

send me to fat camp.

I came back fatter.

Sherm was really pissed.

That's Sherm.

So, what happened to your dad?

My dad's the sh*t.

Is that all?

He got caught a few months ago

trying to rob a casino, so...

Trial day hasn't hit,

so I'm saving up

to bail him out.

-It's no big.

-Whoa.

-Do you wanna see

what he looks like?

-Yeah.

Don't we kinda look alike?

I mean, it's kind of

a small picture, but yeah.

Oh, my God.

You okay?

What's up?

Just calm-- Luke!

Where are you going?

Luke?

Totally normal way

to end a conversation, bro.

What's up, guys?

Oh, my God.

Just leave me alone, please.

What the f*** are you doing?

Get the f*** out!

Stupid.

So f***ing stupid.

Oh, my God, are you okay?

-Don't touch me.

-I'm not gonna touch you.

I'll just, um...

Don't move.

Mom!

Is he okay?

Yeah, just gonna have

a couple of stitches

but other than that,

he should be fine.

Your mom's back there

with him right now.

I know he's kind of messed up

but I feel like he was fine

a few hours ago.

Yeah, well, Luke's, uh...

Luke's a complicated little guy.

There's a lot about him

you don't really know.

Like what?

Uh, just...

Bunch of years ago,

uh, Luke, uh accused

a teacher of, uh,

uh, fondling him.

What!

Touching his penis...

private areas...

and apparently,

Luke thinks

he saw him around town,

but he won't say exactly where.

Okay.

He didn't say whether

it was today or... No?

Well, apparently,

there were some inconsistencies

with Luke's story, and uh,

the police don't

necessarily have the

evidence they need to verify...

They think he was lying.

They don't believe him.

Why would he lie?

I don't know.

It's so f***ed up, Sherm.

Yeah, believe you me.

I'll tell you what...

There's nothing I'd rather do

than go over to

this motherf***er's house

in the middle of the night

with some car batteries

and jumper cables,

and go to town

on that motherf***er.

But, you know,

you got to let

the law do its thing.

Anyways...

What we need

to do right now is,

we need to

let Luke know

that we're here for him,

and we love him,

and we're here to support him.

You know, that's all we can do.

That's what we got to be doing.

-Sherm.

You can't smoke in here.

-Oh, sh*t.

-Yeah, no, no.

I cannot believe

that hot old guy was

a pedo this whole time!

It doesn't make any sense.

He's hot.

Like, he could get

somebody his own age.

-I know!

-I think you're

missing the point.

-I don't know.

No, 'cause, like...

It's not about

who he could get.

Like, obviously

he could get girls.

But he doesn't.

And that's the point.

What are you

even talking about?

What?

We're trying to make

some money, dude.

You can be, like,

a real fun sponge.

If Luke's his type,

what makes you think

he's gonna be into you?

You're not a boy.

Okay, but it's 2016.

Sexuality and gender

are totally fluid concepts now.

Okay, so you're gonna

dress like a boy?

What? No.

Look, how do you know

that he's loaded?

He drives a f***ing Saab, right?

Saab's like a mid-range car.

No, it's a European car.

It's a very nice car.

Trust me.

-Okay.

-I'm in.

-Cool. Cheers.

This is good.

Oh, it is good, yeah.

I was craving salad.

Hi, honey.

Do you want me to

real quick, fix you a plate?

We've some

quinoa set up for you.

I'm okay.

Erica, do you think

I could speak with you

in the other room?

Mm-hm, sure.

Ask him if he wants me

to fix him a plate.

What's up, Lukey?

I wanna go

back to rehab. Can--

Can you help me?

Is this about Will Jordan?

How do you know about that?

I mean, you weren't exactly

subtle back there

at the bowling alley, dude.

It doesn't matter.

The point is, I believe you.

I do.

And, I'm gonna help you.

Just forget I said anything.

Can you scoot over?

I need this side

of the bed. Thanks.

I deal with these sleazebags

on the reg, okay?

I know what goes on

in this town

behind closed doors...

and open doors.

What do you have in mind?

The way I see it,

you've got two options here.

You can either

superglue your a**hole shut

and spend the rest of your life

running away from this guy

like a little b*tch,

or we can bust his pervy ass...

and make the motherf***er pay!

Think about it, okay?

Hm.

I'm taking this.

So, Erica says this is like

your ex-boyfriend or something.

Was it serious?

Yeah, did you go all the way or

did you just make out and stuff?

What the f***

is wrong with you guys?

He isn't some science project

for you to analyze.

He is a human bean.

"

-Enough!

Guys, nothing's even

gonna happen. Can we

please just get out of here?

No! This is a stakeout.

You didn't think

it actually involved

eating steak, did you?

You're so funny.

My mom keeps texting me.

I should probably go home soon.

Nobody's going anywhere

until we see this guy

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