Four Rooms Page #12

SIGFRIED:

(into phone)

What?

(pause)

We ain't got any needles here, kid. Just a big f***ing gun.

He listens to the other line, says good-bye, and hangs up.

SIGFRIED:

(to Ted)

Now, where was I? Oh yeah, I remember.

Sigfried kneels next to Ted and assumes a prayer position.

SIGFRIED:

I want you to pray for forgiveness, Theodore.

Sigfried, hands clasped together, signals for Ted to do the same. The gun

lies at his side. Ted considers a bold move, but thinks better of it.

Sigfried's eyes pop open. He cuts a look to Ted, signaling him to assume

the pose.

SIGFRIED:

(continuing)

Now say after me, "I apologize . . ."

TED:

I apologize . . .

SIGFRIED:

For what?

Ted looks to Angela for help. She can only stare back with intense,

wide-open eyes.

SIGFRIED:

For f***ing what?

TED:

That I said you might have been unfaithful?

SIGFRIED:

"That I said you might have been unfaithful?" Listen, Theodore,

you're in church here . . . you're kneeling in front of an altar.

Truth . . . truth is all it hears. Say the following, "I, Theodore,

must humbly and sincerely apologize for saying that you

f***ed another man!"

Ted repeats what Sigfried has told him. This appears to have a calming

effect on Sigfried, who gets up off the floor, turning his face to Angela.

SIGFRIED:

(continuing)

Satisfied?

Angela nods.

SIGFRIED:

(continuing)

Do you accept the f***ing apology?

Naturally, Angela says nothing.

SIGFRIED:

(continuing)

You always gotta get the last word, don't you? It's one way

with you, Angela, isn't it? I give and I give and I get nothing back.

Sigfried turns to Ted.

SIGFRIED:

(continuing)

She just sits there waiting for me to jump through hoops . . . .

Angela attempts to speak through the gag. Both men wait with bated breath

for a response. Sigfried's had enough.

SIGFRIED:

(continuing)

Stupid me, for a second I thought you were going to say

something . . . something like, "I'm sorry." HA! "I'm

sorry." You're absolutely right, love cakes, I wouldn't want

it that way. That's one thing you can say about Angela.

She'll never do anything she doesn't want to do. If the feeling

ain't there, she just isn't going to do it. There is nothing in

this world as f***ed as a woman who gives when she doesn't

want to. Never let that happen to you, Theodore. It makes

you feel very little indeed.

Ted beckons Sigfried.

TED:

You mind if I . . . ?

SIGFRIED:

Go ahead. Spit it out.

TED:

I don't mean to upset you further, sir, but I think she was

trying to say yes.

SIGFRIED:

Are you condescending to me, Theodore?

TED:

Absolutely not, I would never do that.

SIGFRIED:

Why don't you just say it?

TED:

Say what?

SIGFRIED:

That you think I'm an idiot.

TED:

I would never say that.

SIGFRIED:

You think you're superior to me, don't ya, Theodore? You

don't think I notice there is a gag in the woman's mouth.

TED:

Of course you do.

SIGFRIED:

Naturally "of course." And do you know how I know that?

TED:

How, sir?

SIGFRIED:

Because I PUT THE GAG IN HER MOUTH! I'm gonna let

you in on a little secret about communication, Theodore.

It's all in the eyes . . .

(points the gun at Ted)

Him?

(turns the gun on himself)

Or me? Him or me? No one? Okay. Let's drag it out.

Sigfried empties the last of the pills into his mouth, heaving the empty

bottle over his shoulder. He takes off, disappearing into the bathroom.

INT. ROOM 404

Ted finds himself alone with Angela. They lock eyes. Angela implores Ted to

lean forward. Ted sizes up the situation: His chances of making it to the

door are slim due to the fact that he would have to pass by the bathroom

door. Ted paces back and forth in front of Angela, who struggles to get his

attention. He whips around and they face off in what appears to be a game

of charades. Ted finally gets the point and cautiously removes the gag from

Angela's mouth. Angela spits an old sock out.

TED:

What!

ANGELA:

We don't have time to play charades here, a**hole! Untie

me quick.

TED:

Listen, lady, I don't know what in the hell is going on here,

but I'd appreciate it if you would explain to that nutcase

that he's making a big mistake.

ANGELA:

Look, whether you like it or not, you're in the middle of a

situation here you can't just wish your way out of.

TED:

But I've never seen you people before, we're complete strangers.

ANGELA:

Everyone starts out strangers, Ted, it's where we end up

that counts. Hurry up.

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