French Kiss Page #4

I Dream Of You

Chips, Chips

You are currently

a resident of Canada

in the process of applying

for Canadian citizenship?

My fianc is Canadian.

Let me ask you something.

You no longer want

to be an American,

but you expect me

to give you a new passport?

Is this a trick question?

I'll need a copy

of your Canadian resident visa

before I can process

your application.

Next.

OK.

How it works is,

I ask you a question,

and you comment.

You weren't supposed

to leave Canada?

Yeah, I know that,

but an emergency

situation arose,

and I needed to...

What are you writing down?

Why didn't you

request permission

to leave for your emergency?

Well, I should have, I realize.

But an emergency,

by definition,

doesn't give you the time.

See, the thing is, sir,

I want to be a Canadian

more than anything.

I want to be just like you.

Believe me.

I just want to go home.

What's that?

OK.

Have you...

Ever been convicted...

Of a felony?

No.

Yes.

OK.

OK, I was at

Ronny Templeton's house,

and somebody handed me...

All right,

it wasn't a cigarette,

peer pressure.

Peer pressure's

a terrible thing

when you're a girl in college.

Thing is, we just received this

from a Sergeant Patton

at the American Embassy.

It says you were once convicted

for possession of a narcotic.

Is marijuana really a narcotic?

I mean, it was

just the one time,

and I didn't even enjoy it.

I inhaled,

but then I was coughing

and hacking away

for 10 minutes.

I hate that.

You do?

Well, the point is

is that you didn't

include this information

in your application for

Canadian citizenship,

paragraph 5, article 1?

OK.

Here's where I tell you

that your request

for a new residence visa

has been denied.

Merci.

Yeah. He proposed to her.

He's such an a**hole.

I just can't believe it.

Do I have to be friends

with Juliette?

Lilly...

Lilly, now, stop it, all right?

He's not going to marry her.

Now, tell me

everything you know.

They're going somewhere

in the south of France

to meet her parents,

then they're getting married.

We're not even invited.

Not that I'd go...

Lilly, now, listen, OK?

This is very important.

Very important.

You have to tell me

exactly where they're going

and when, all right?

Now, just... just ask mom.

She has it all

written down probably.

OK.

You still supposed

to call her mom?

Lilly!

OK.

Mom!

Kate? Is that you, sweetheart?

I've got all the information

written down,

but I think you can

still get him

at the hotel in Paris.

My god, she's crying.

It's OK. I'm not crying.

I'm just...

I'm just...

I'm going to get him back, mom.

I'm going to get him back,

and I'm going to

make him love me,

and we're going to live

happily ever after.

And I'm just crying now in...

Happiness...

Because I know...

I know I will...

I will triumph.

What do they call the beaches?

What does it mean?

The blue coast.

The blue coast,

lying there next to you.

And we're going

to land in Nice.

Nice?

Yes.

That's nice.

Sweet.

Bob, you know how it works.

If the little fish is to survive,

he must tell the fisherman...

where the big fish are.

Forget it, I'm no rat.

You're mixing your metaphors.

Who buys the passports?

Hi there.

Welcome back, madame,

to the George V.

It's incredible

how you do that.

The words come out

"welcome back,"

but the meaning is

completely different.

Is that a French thing

or a concierge thing?

As madame wishes.

You did it again.

Tell me something,

because I... I just don't get it.

Do you enjoy being that rude?

Because when you do that,

it just gets

underneath my skin,

and it makes me

completely insane!

Thank you, madame, for

the fascinating lesson

in our cultural differences.

I'm sure it would not

betray my duty now

to inform you that your

fianc and his friend

are no longer our guests.

Well, whose guests

would they be now?

The Carlton Hotel will have

that happy privilege

when they arrive

in Cannes tomorrow.

Perhaps madame wishes to

catch the last train tonight.

I could arrange for

a taxi very quickly.

Yes, thank you.

Bob, I'm losing patience.

A big fish just returned

from the United States.

Luc Teyssier... your friend, right?

Ask him about a stolen necklace.

He won't be hard to find.

Take a look.

You're welcome.

Allons-y!

I come to make peace

with your people.

So you're still after Charlie?

It is incredible.

I admire your persistence.

It's so American.

I am not an American.

I'm a soon-to-be

ex-American Canadian.

May I help you with your bag?

No, maybe not.

I am feeling some very

strange emotions for me.

Guilt. Remorse.

My self-esteem is rock bottom.

What can I do to say I'm sorry?

Shut up!

You haven't spent

when you weren't

after something.

What's it this time,

buy, sell, or trade?

True, I used you a lot.

You helped me to get my vine,

and I left you with nothing.

What can I do to

make it up to you?

Now I'm here for you.

Typical.

Who put this here?

So I asked myself

what I can possibly do

to make it up to you,

so I buy this ticket,

and voila, here I am...

Quiet.

You come, you go,

you promise one thing,

you do something else.

Why should I believe you?

Because I have

no reason to lie now.

Do I look like the kind...

You look like the kind

who steals airplane

liquor bottles,

who offers a girl a ride,

then has to steal a car

in order to give it to her,

the kind who puts a plant

in a person's bag.

This is a no-smoking

compartment.

OK, I stop. Voila. For you.

See, I'm changing, I'm growing.

We help each other.

I don't need your help.

Do you have a plan for

when you see Charlie?

Still no?

You're going into a battle,

you have no strategy,

no armor, no bullshit?

I don't need bullshit

to get Charlie back.

Just a little.

It might be handy.

For me, bullshit

is like breathing.

I stay. I help you.

I promise, OK.?

Do what you want.

It's a free country.

Isn't it?

Well, oui.

Is... is that Charlie?

Can I...

How did you meet?

At a party.

I'd just come to Toronto

on a teaching exchange.

We started talking,

and I had this

feeling about him.

It wasn't exactly a thunderclap

or a lightning bolt.

It was more like a...

Light drizzle?

You really, honestly,

never had that feeling

about anybody

in your whole entire life?

If I did, I would not admit it.

His chin looks a little

weak, if you ask me.

It doesn't, and I didn't.

Why wouldn't you

admit that feeling?

Why? Look where it's got you.

Maybe if you did,

you wouldn't have

that little problem.

It's not a problem.

It's just a temporary...

There's something in his eyes.

Vain, it is a word, no?

It is a word.

He has beautiful eyes.

And he knows it.

You can see it in his smile.

Not even a smile.

A smirk. Is a word?

Shut up. Is it a word?

Two words, no?

Why are you chasing after him

after what he's done?

Because I love him,

and I'm afraid if he

doesn't come back

that I'll... It'll hurt so much

that I'll shrivel up

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