Full Moon High Page #3

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Empty, conspiracy!

He'll never get me in the bomb shelter!

Oh, the bomb shelter.

I'm safe, ammunition.

They got me Joe.

The commies turned my son into a wolf.

I don't know how they did it.

Might've been something in the water.

Fluoride, they say fluoride's

good for your teeth.

Did you get a load of his teeth?

I heard about being long in the tooth,

but that's just too long.

Ah Joe, why didn't they listen to you

back then when they had a chance?

I think 50 would be appropriate.

No no no, not now, after.

A small envelope, all right?

Okay, Father.

We are here to bid farewell

to this, to this dead person.

Not yet!

Somebody will please remove the hawk,

or blackbird from the coffin, please,

and please hold all further gunplay

until the conclusion of this benediction.

Who's got earplugs, madam?

Thank you, that's very kind of you.

Thank you very much, madam.

You're leaving town, aren't you?

Now, where was I?

How could you tell?

I don't know.

I just kinda had a funny feeling

ever since you got back

from the European trip.

Can you hear me?

Can you hear me?

Can you hear me, sir?

Boy, you a high school dropout, huh.

Nobody would never

believe this would happen.

All right, all right,

so I let everybody down.

You're damn right, you did.

Boy, I'd like to.

Go ahead, go ahead, rap me in the teeth

right in the middle of

my father's funeral.

I deserve it, come on.

I guess it would be in bad taste.

Will you, will you boys,

please, please shut up

until I finish this dedication.

Now, where was I?

Where did I start.

I've got to start over again.

Oh sugar, I can't hear a thing.

Dearly beloved and

others, we are gathered.

Oh, oh, amen.

Hey!

Ah, Tony!

Jane, Jane, get outta here!

Tony!

What're you nuts?

Get off of the bus, lady!

I'll change my seat.

Tony, don't leave me, don't leave me.

You're gonna kill yourself.

Listen, you didn't pay a fare!

These people paid!

Get off my bus, Miss!

You're acting crazy now.

I'm gonna smack you!

Tony, Tony, Tony wait.

Aren't you gonna feel guilty, Tony!

What do I care?

You'll be back.

You'll be back for more.

It's okay now.

Say it's gonna be a

full moon again, isn't it?

Oh, you sound lonesome.

Are you leaving home for the first time?

Yeah.

That sure is some

pushy dame, over there.

Hanging on the bus and everything.

Well, she can't help

being crazy about me.

Oh, I can understand

it, you are attractive.

Listen uh, you wanna

sit up here next to me?

I'll let you steer.

No, thank you.

Say, you don't happen to

know Coach Cleveland, do you?

Would you stop it.

Now look, it says right in the regulation,

no touching, talking to, and

or annoying the bus driver

while the bus is in motion.

Says it right in the regulations.

What kind of passengers do I get.

First she hangs on the bus.

Now this nut.

I don't understand it.

I'm not going to tell you again.

Attention, attention passengers.

This is your bus driver speaking, help!

Oh geez, ah!

Where'd he bite you?

I mean who would believe this?

Who would believe it?

Look at this right over here.

A wolf bites me on a Greyhound

and he runs off and steals my bus.

A little fuzzy son of a b*tch.

I don't believe, $86,000,

I gotta come up with.

Look at this, he bit him on the ass.

I carry the sign of the pentagram.

I will remain young, never to age.

I am doomed to wander the earth

until I get sick of packing,

then I will return home

to fulfill my destiny.

Did I leave anything out?

Beat Simpson, there's still time.

Excuse me.

Did you see that?

Get a load of that guy.

Unbelievable, that man out

there is the spitting image

of a youngster I had on the football team

almost 20 years ago.

I'm not absolutely sure I had him.

As a matter of fact,

I'm thinking about it.

Did I come at a bad time?

It's always a bad time.

I don't think my class likes me at all.

Well, we mustn't be

frightened of our students.

I try to explain to my pupils

that flogging is not

permitted in schools today,

but they keep right on hitting me.

20 years, where's my youth gone?

Now, I've been uh,

I've been looking at your

record here, Miss uh.

Montgomery.

Montgomery, and uh,

it appears you've been in six schools

in the last four years,

and you've been sexually assaulted

in each and every one of them.

Well, yes.

And the last school

was an all girls school.

Well.

An elementary all girls school.

A handicapped elementary all girls school.

They began busing in

some very hostile girls.

Uh huh, well, you are

in high school now, Missy.

With students who are mature

enough to be threatened,

so you just look them straight in the eye,

and you bend them to your iron will.

Couldn't we search the

children before each class?

Take away their knives and razors?

We are installing a

metal detector next term.

Until then we're going to

have to make do, aren't we?

Who is looking after your class?

Go, go, go.

What is that, beer?

Is that an alcoholic beverage?

Go ahead and explain that to your mother.

Leave him alone, leave him alone!

Oh, you swine!

Kiss me, mm, mm, mm.

Stop it, stop it, stop it!

Get the aid here.

You remember, huh, come on.

What's that smell?

Ooh.

Well, hello.

You're new here.

I bet you aren't even armed yet.

Oh no, I'm just here

to register for classes.

See, my father used to go to this school.

Tony Walker Sr.

You don't mean that

spooky old Walker house

out on Sycamore Road?

Mm hmm, see uh, my father dropped out.

He never graduated.

He never got a chance

to play in the big game.

And you came back to

do all that for him.

Well, be careful.

Between the two of us,

don't bring any valuables to school,

such as books or papers or lunch.

I certainly hope I'm

in one of your classes.

You're very nice.

I am?

Yes, you're also quite pretty.

I am?

Oh, well, of course I am.

Hi there.

You're really a fox, you know?

Not exactly, but you're close.

Say son, uh,

I thought somebody might be trespassing.

Did you buy this place?

No uh, my family still owns it.

Yeah, my dad used to live

here when he was a boy.

I, I knew your dad real well.

Boy, you sure do look a lot like him.

Oh, thank you very much.

You know uh, Full Moon High,

we had a great ball team back

when your dad was around.

We could've beat Simpson, if

he'd stuck around for a while.

Well, maybe we'll

beat him this year, huh?

Yeah, say uh, what happened to old Tony?

I thought he'd write or

come back or something.

He's uh, he's not alive anymore.

I don't really like to talk about it.

Boy, you sure do sound a lot like him.

I'm sorry, I ran over your sign out front.

Oh, that's perfectly okay.

I don't plan on selling the place.

Well, I think I'm gonna live here,

at least until I graduate.

Oh, well look,

you'll have to come over

for dinner sometime.

My wife Janie, she used to

know your dad real well.

Exceptionally well, as a matter of fact.

She'd probably really enjoy seeing ya.

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