Ghost Team One Page #2

No, I think those are brownies.

- Yeah, brownies?

- F***.

Yeah, I know what sh*t smells like.

Who the f*** is that?

Good morning, neighbor.

The noise level last night was...

Here's my theory, okay?

One of your pothead friends

decided to let his ass loose in our sink,

and instead of cleaning it up,

one of you two fuckwads

covered it up with a plate.

Am I right? Am I close?

I wouldn't jump to conclusions.

Damn it. Motherf***er!

Hi. We'd just like to talk to you about...

Did you sh*t in my sink?

If I ever see you here again,

I'm gonna kill your friend.

- God damn it!

- Sorry, Chuck.

Shut the f*** up! You guys can have

your f***ing parties, all right?

I'll go to my mom's house,

I'll play f***ing Jenga.

Whatever! Okay?

But...

I just want a certain amount

of respect when I get home.

Jesus f***ing Christ!

Did you hear what the... Tits.

- Hi!

- Hey!

How are you? Hi.

- Hey!

- Hi.

I'm sorry I didn't call,

but I didn't got your guys' numbers.

- It's not too early, right?

- No, no.

- Of course not.

- No, no, no. Not at all.

- Have you seen the ghost?

- What the f*** are you talking about?

You know,

we should probably go to my room.

Let's go to my room, it's bigger.

Yeah, did you mean the room

with the naked Becky in bed?

My friend Becky just...

- She got sick, so...

- Yeah.

- Yeah, let's go to your room.

- Okay!

Let me just pick up.

I wasn't ready for the...

- Do you have a cold?

- I probably wouldn't...

I just... I was just, you know, sick.

Right here.

Watch it.

- Wow.

- Yeah.

Are you in the f***ing room?

Okay, stop. You can probably...

Just go ahead and pause it right there.

- Okay.

- That was the ghost screaming,

- and that'd be like, that's the...

- Wow.

Yeah, so it was pretty gnarly,

as you can tell.

I think we should take this

to the next level,

maybe setting up a bunch of cameras.

That's a funny thing

that you should say that

because we were actually

in plans of getting

a whole lot of cameras.

The only thing is that we do have to

take advantage of this camera

that we have right now

until the big shipment comes in soon.

I probably wouldn't touch that.

Don't, please don't...

Just go ahead and leave it.

Yeah, he was sick. He was sick.

What I want is really

to understand this spirit,

or what is going on,

and we can maybe help it.

- You know, help this spirit.

- Yeah, totally.

Another thing is that

we need to introduce ourselves.

- Yeah.

- Maybe not so much Brad, but, like...

Actually, we should

probably interview you.

- What do you think about...

- Yeah, we should interview you.

That's what we were

talking about earlier.

- We were talking about that.

- That's what I had said.

But I don't look good today.

My name is Fernanda Matavilla Fuerte.

And how long have you been

interested in the paranormal?

Probably since my mom passed away,

I always wanted to find ways to try

to communicate with her, so...

I'm sorry, I didn't know.

It's okay.

- Have you ever seen a ghost?

- Yeah.

How many times?

- Six hundred, I don't know.

- Six hundred times?

Well, I never really

counted them, but, yeah...

But you've seen a lot of ghosts?

Six hundred.

Could you tell us about

the first time you saw a ghost?

I was in love with this boy,

and I had all these emotions going,

you know, for my first kiss.

You know,

I thought he was the love of my life.

I still remember how, like, the first

time when he touched my lips

and, like, slowly came down and then

he's starting to touch all my body.

He's like... And go around

and then touching my breast

and then touching my nipple.

I still remember everything.

It was really...

It was really good.

I found out that my love

left me for another girl

that was more developed than me.

I just felt really lonely.

Like, all this pain was just a lot,

you know, when you're a little girl

and you don't have anybody to talk to.

Until one night,

I just felt, like,

this really warm presence next to me.

And all of a sudden,

I just felt, like, that comfort.

And it was my mom.

And she was next to me

and she told me,

"Fernanda, don't worry, it's okay.

"You'll find your true love,

"and you're gonna be

with him forever and ever

"and it'll be eternal love. "

Was that good? I'm sorry.

No, that was...

That was really good.

That was too good.

I'm sorry, I got all...

It's one of the best things

I've ever filmed.

Do you mind if I go to the bathroom?

No, go ahead. Take your time.

Okay, thanks.

Holy f***ing sh*t.

That is the hottest crazy chick

I have ever met in my life.

Come on, dude, she's not crazy.

What do you mean

she's not f***ing crazy, bro?

She believes in ghosts.

Were you not there with the footage?

Did you not hear what I heard?

Oh, my God,

those are called orgasms, Sergio, okay?

It's not a big f***ing deal to me.

It's not some f***ing

alien sound, all right?

Oh, my God, I wanna do

that to her all the time.

- I'm not proud of what I'm about to do...

- What?

- So you just listen closely.

- What's going on?

I'm gonna need you to really

do me a favor, all right?

You have a bunch

of crazy chicks that you can f***,

and all I'm asking is that

you stay away from this one.

Why?

Because I feel like I like her.

- You feel... F*** you.

- Shut up.

Listen to me, okay? You don't...

That guy right there,

you see that guy? Are you looking?

That guy, he knows.

You don't fall in love

with a crazy chick, okay?

They will f*** you up.

Did you get that or no?

Yeah, maybe I wanna get f***ed up.

You ever think of that?

What are you, f***ing Rihanna?

You gonna back off?

I wanna hear it. I wanna hear it

out of your f***ing mouth.

- Just say it.

- What do you want me to say?

- Back off.

- To you?

Just say you're gonna back off from her.

- No!

- Say it.

- No!

- Say it.

- No!

- Say it.

Now, just now,

because of all of this, for your sake,

I'm definitely f***ing her.

I can't even remember the last time

I felt something for someone.

And I'm just...

- If you could...

- I'm pretty sure you felt so...

- Hey, guys. Sorry.

- Don't worry.

We're gonna have

to take it back from the...

I had to make a poopie.

I think we should

do more research about this.

Yeah.

I would love to know more

about these murders and...

- Right. The what?

- The what?

When I put your address on Google,

this came up.

- Okay.

- Holy sh*t! That's the house!

I guess this Lady Azalea died here.

Wait. What, who died?

What the f*** is a pleasure house?

Wait. What do you mean she died?

It says, "If you want to know more about

the story of the house, buy the book. "

- Well, how much is the book?

- $49.99.

- What the f***?

- What?

Right here it said that

the author lives in Pasadena.

So I think we should contact him.

Why don't we just contact him

instead of buying the book?

That's what I was just thinking.

No, I think he should be in the movie.

Go straight to the horse's mouth.

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