Girls Trip Page #8

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got a true sausage connoisseur,

why don't we show her, and you guys,

everything you can do with a sausage.

Ah.

- Well, what do we have here?

- Cleaver.

Ah. So, let's take this cleaver...

It's a big cleaver, baby...

you should be careful with that.

Well, you know what, baby?

- I'm always careful.

- Mm-hmm.

Show him who's boss, girl!

Ooh! Ooh!

You don't want any part of this sausage...

not being cut!

Isn't that right, Stew?

Well, what is this?

There's nothing better

than a tender sausage

who knows who's in charge!

- Right, baby?

- She's the boss.

- Yes, girl! Whoo!

- Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!

Ooh, girl!

- Mash that meat.

- Girl, put your back into it!

Beat it!

If your arms ain't tired,

you ain't been cookin'.

Who knew?

Kitchen shears... this is

an underutilized utensil

- in the kitchen.

- Well, I am gonna take

this underutilized tool,

and I'm gonna put it on

this over-utilized sausage.

Ooh!

What does that look like,

hanging like that, to you?

I don't know,

but we gonna cut it off today.

Oh, my God.

Ryan's a hoot.

- She's a hoot.

- Yes.

She's a hoot.

What the f*** is going on?

I'm still waiting on my sausage.

Oh. Well, here, have some of mine.

Gaggin'. You gaggin'?

Now, that, my friends,

is the essence of cooking.

That was f***ing amazing.

The crowd loved it. Bethany loved it.

Were those your girls? I

thought there was only three.

Who-who was the hottie

with the badunkadunk?

The junk in the trunk. That can had

its own soundtrack, am I right?

- She's nobody.

- I've never seen her before.

Oh, crap. I got to go get her

number, 'cause she was amazing.

- She's worth it.

- No!

Okay, okay. Okay.

You know what, it's better

if it's improvised, anyway.

Stewart, there is a reporter out there

who is a big football fan.

Can I just borrow you for a minute?

Ooh. So tense.

Little tight.

Come on, buddy, loosen it up.

I am...

strong.

I am... powerful.

I am beautiful.

I am... strong.

I am...

powerful.

I am beautiful. I am...

I am...

strong.

I am powerful.

I am beautiful.

I am strong.

I am... powerful. I am beautiful.

I am strong.

You good, Ry?

Yeah, I'm good.

All in a day's work, right?

Thanks for having my back up there.

Of course.

Yeah.

- Ry.

- Hmm?

You can't keep pretending

that this photo doesn't exist.

It's gonna get out there.

It's all fair game in journalism.

Journalism?

Is that what this is?

Fine, you just keep handling your business.

You've been doing such

a great job thus far.

All right.

Fine.

What do you think I should do?

Well...

first of all, let me find out

if anyone else has the photo.

And if not, let me leak it.

Are you crazy?

No. I am in the middle of a deal.

I cannot have pictures of him

kissing another woman on your site. No!

Hear me out.

If I leak it... you can get in front of it,

steer the conversation,

instead of letting TMZ

write their own bullshit spin on it.

You find the right angle,

you minimize the damage.

Okay, just let me think

about it, all right?

And-and let me talk to a few people first.

Let me... let me just run it by 'em.

And can-can you stall them

for a little bit longer?

I got you.

Thank you, Sasha.

Of course.

I got Muslim oils, Christian

oils, I got Buddha oils.

I got ball spray.

Everybody got a drink.

- I need a drink.

- Authentic hurricanes!

- Two for $25!

- Oh, shoot, there we go, there we go.

I got something for the kids. I... Ooh.

- Two for $25?

- $25.

Wait, wait, wait, hey, hey, hey, beautiful.

Right here. Come on.

- Me?

- Yeah, yeah, yeah, right here.

Sorry. He called me beautiful.

I'm beautiful now, huh?

Ooh, Lord, Lord!

- Hi.

- Whee!

Got to be careful. Listen, I got... look,

I see you over there

chasing that hurricane.

I got the best thing

- in New Orleans right here.

- What's that?

Uh...

Look at that right there.

What the f*** is that?

Whoo!

This is 200-year-old

wormwood absinthe.

Green Fairy.

- I want it. Give it to me.

- Hey, hey, hey,

calm down, now... you don't

know what you're getting into.

This stuff right here come

with instructions, okay?

Boy, I don't give a f***...

that sh*t is green, shiny,

and looks like it'll have

me hella bent. I want it.

Yes, but you're only supposed

to take a splash of this,

- Okay.

- Young lady, because if you drink too much of it,

it's gonna have you hallucinating.

- Ooh!

- All right, that's cool with me.

Now, look, that whole bottle will last you

- for five years, all right?

- Okay, five months. Got it.

No, no. Did you hear what

I just said? Five years.

- You're not listening to what I'm...

- Okay.

- I...

- Five days. This will be used very irresponsibly.

- Thank you. Sasha!

- Young lady,

you about to be a mental

health patient with a fat ass.

Oils! Incense!

I got coochie spray!

Get a homie, lover, friend

A homie, lover, friend

to make you climax...

Ooh! Damn.

Over again and again, I

intend to have you goin'...

Ah, that's a good one.

With the fever, you got the fever

You need a believer

You know what, you guys shouldn't be

in the grass... you know

you're allergic to grass.

Left hand red.

- Okay, I'm about to go see a man sing.

- Oh, have fun.

- Hi, guys!

- Hey, Auntie Ry-Ry.

- Bye, guys!

- I love you.

- Bye, Mama.

- Mwah!

Aw, they're so cute.

- I miss them.

- Mm-hmm.

You know what?

Have you and Stewart thought

about having a family?

I mean...

kids have a way of bringing

people closer together,

and definitely have a way of changing men.

Mm. Yeah, it made your husband

change his address!

We've talked about it, yeah.

I'm just so focused on my career right now.

I get it... but don't wait too long.

'Cause nobody's gonna

love you like your babies.

Hey...!

Is this the Flossy Posse suite?

Yes, it is.

Did you guys get my succulent?

Who is you?

Oh, hi. Liz Davelli... I'm Ryan's agent.

- Nice to meet you.

- Hey! - Hey! - Hi!

- Welcome. You made it.

- Ah, I did, I did. Oh, my lady.

My queen. Real quick.

Bethany wants to spend a little

one-on-one with you and Stewart

- at the Croc party.

- Okay.

I know you're with the "F" to the "P,"

but just give her 15 minutes,

inspire her to add a zero

- to the deal.

- Of course. Yes.

Hey, how about we have a toast?

- Ooh, are these hurricanes?

- Okay. - Mm.

F*** a hurricane, girl...

these are tsunamis.

- Ooh!

- I'm scared.

To Friday night, Flossy Posse style!

Yeah!

For real, though! Mmm!

What's a little

liquor to a cold heart

What's a little pill but

a little number feeling now

It can never end if it don't start

You can never do it all if

you ain't ever willin', ah

Hold up, I think my phone vibratin'

Slow up, I think the

whole world hatin'

Came up, and now the

whole view changin'

I've been up on game,

I've just been wait...

Whoa.

I feel funny.

Do y'all feel funny?

You feel funny? I-I feel...

I feel fine.

I feel so fine.

Feel me. Y'all feel me.

- You want me to feel you?

- Feel me, yeah, sista.

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