Going Berserk Page #7

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Are you all right?

I'm fine. Take a bow.

Yeah, I'm an a**hole

and I'm loving it!

Hey, let's mambo! Thank you

very much. Okay, fellas, take

it easy. Take five minutes.

Okay, can we have

a little light here, please?

Thank you very much.

Oh, that feels nice.

That feels...

Doesn't that feel nice? Huh?

It's incredible what light

will do to you. It just

changes the whole mood.

I feel, I feel like singing.

I feel like singing.

I hope you folks don't mind.

This next song is dedicated,

well, to you, honey.

My fiance.

She's wonderful.

This is her right here.

The one with the blue eyes,

soft blonde hair.

A wonderful lady.

The greatest lady in bed

you'll ever wanna meet.

She's amazing. I mean...

I mean this.

The things that she can do

with her mouth.

They're just...

It's incredible.

I mean, she has...

She knows so many

sexual positions.

I'm dumbfounded half the time

and I mean that, honey,

I really do.

You're incredible.

The best lay I've ever had.

I mean, I would put her up

against anybody in this room

right now.

I mean, she'll wear you down.

She'll wear you right down.

She just grinds,

grinds you to death.

I mean, she...

You know, all day.

It's all day with her.

It's just non-stop.

She can't get enough.

And I respect that

and I love you.

And this song goes out

to you, honey.

It's entitled,

Me and My Dick.

Help me out

'cause this is a special song.

I'm gonna sing with my dick

in my hand, for you, honey.

I love you. I mean that.

Drum roll, please!

I'm trying

to understand, John.

I know. I guess it's like

what Dr. Ted said. Somebody

must have put me in a spell

and I've been walking around

in this voodoo-like trance.

You were definitely

in a trance

at that wedding rehearsal.

I know.

I don't normally

act that way.

I wanna thank you guys

for sticking with me.

Hey, anything to get

the old Johnny back, huh?

I'm gonna get the limo.

I'll meet you on the corner.

Thanks, Chick.

Okay.

You know, I love you, Nancy.

I know you do.

Everything's gonna be okay.

Yeah.

I want you

to open your eyes, John.

This hypnotism isn't

gonna work. All it does

is make him act like a jerk.

He's not gonna kill anyone.

Yes, it will work.

His respect

for the institution of

fatherhood was too strong.

It caused a mental block.

Once we destroy that respect,

he'll be exactly what

we want him to be.

SUN Yl:
Who's that imbecile

out there?

That's his friend.

Make him one with the ocean.

Let him sleep with the fishes.

You know, John, a lot

of bad people are out there

trying to get you.

Really?

That's why we had

to bring you here.

We wanted to make sure

you'd be safe.

That's very kind of you.

One of those bad people

is your future father-in-law,

Ed Reese.

I'm looking for a John.

My name...

I wonder if you saw him.

He's about this tall,

light-colored hair,

round face.

He's got a good nature,

good-natured guy.

He's got a...

He laughs like that.

I think he's with a couple

of gentlemen.

Let's go, buster.

And no trouble.

Fathers are the root

of it all, John.

I have a great respect

for the institution

of fatherhood.

Do you see?

Fathers are bad, John.

And they must be stopped

at all costs.

Think of all the damage

they've done.

You know, John,

throughout history,

it was the father

who was the cause

of all the trouble.

Hi, honey, I'm home.

Hello, dear.

Where's Princess?

Here she is.

Hi, Dad.

Hi, Princess.

And where's my Kitten?

She's upstairs.

Hi, Daddy.

Hi, Kitten.

Why don't you just

slide down the banister?

You know Daddy will always

be here to catch you.

Here I come.

Another cup, dear?

No, this coffee sucks!

Maybe it's the caffeine

that makes you so irritable.

I'm not irritable,

God damn it!

I'm an insurance salesman.

Insurance salesmen

never get irritable, Margaret.

Anything you say, dear.

Where's Bud,

that gearhead son of mine?

You locked him

in the shed for a week,

don't you remember, dear?

Oh, yes.

Hi, Father.

Hi, Princess.

Father, a very nice

young man asked me

to the RO TC ball next Friday.

Can I go?

No.

But why not?

He's perfectly acceptable.

And a lot of my friends

are going.

I said no.

Friday is punishment night,

Princess.

Father, I really wanna go.

Well, maybe you'd like to

talk about this in the den.

Please, Father.

Oh, let's talk about it,

Princess.

Please, don't! No!

Let's have a little chat!

Come on, Princess!

Margaret? You're next.

Hi, Mrs. Anderson.

Hi, Mr. Anderson.

Do you think

I could hide out here

for a while?

Beaver, what's wrong?

You're covered with blood.

Yeah, I know.

It's Wally's blood.

See, Wally and I

were fixing his bike

in the driveway

and Dad came home

and got real mad.

So he took a gun out

and killed Wally.

Blew his head clean off

his shoulders.

His face is all over

the garage door,

it's a real mess.

Well, maybe your dad

knows what he's doing.

I don't think so.

I think he flipped out.

Margaret, call up Ward.

Tell him Beaver's here.

Oh, don't do that,

Mr. Anderson. Please,

Mrs. Anderson, don't do that.

I think it's time

you had your punishment,

Beaver.

Oh, no, Mr. Anderson, no! No!

No! No! No! No!

No, don't do that

to the Beaver.

You can't do it to Beaver.

I hate you, Ward!

I hate Jim Anderson!

I hate Ed Reese!

Good, John.

Now, when you hear

the Minister say,

"With this ring I thee wed,"

you will take out your gun,

point it at Ed Reese

and squeeze the trigger.

It's the father of the bride.

So nice to see you again,

Congressman.

Hey, couldn't ask

for nicer weather, huh?

Listen, we both know why

you're here, you low-life

scumbag, son of a b*tch!

Jim? Good to see you, Jim.

Just don't press your luck!

Don't ever try to talk

to me again, you hear?

Hey! That's wonderful.

That's great, what a thing.

A marvelous sense of humor.

That's nice and low.

Bobby, get down.

Let's get the, the majesty

of this damn thing.

Yeah. Yeah. Just kind of

pan around. That's it.

Just move, move! That's it.

What are you looking at?

I'm not here! Just do

your thing! It's a wedding.

Hi. Friends of the bride

on this side, friends of

the groom on this side.

Groom.

Don't look at me.

Just keep walking.

That's beautiful.

Good. Can we

get the black guy?

Can you get in here,

'cause that's very important

for the Congressman?

We need some black people

in this. That's nice.

Hi. So far so good, huh?

Hold your tongue.

The hardest part

is still to come.

Where's the leader?

He's around, somewhere,

watching,

like a cat on the prowl

stalking his prey,

making every movement count.

Shouldn't we go?

Yes.

Keep moving.

I was a little hungry.

It's good. It's a good thing

to be hungry. It's allowed.

I saw Patti.

You did a good job with her.

She looks very fine.

I hope the spell lasts.

It's been known to wear off

under pressure.

Negative thoughts.

No negative thoughts.

Circulate.

That's good, just...

That's good. This is...

That's good.

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