Going The Distance Page #6

- Hey.

- Hey.

- I love them. Yeah.

- Yeah? They're so good.

You don't believe me

They spent three years and all their money

getting this produced.

Really?

These are the bands

that should get noticed.

I hate that. I hate that a band like this

would get passed over because of money.

It's just take a chance on someone

because they deserve it...

...because they're genuinely talented.

Sorry. I'm sorry.

It's just frustrating because I know

at my labeI they'd never go for this.

It would be like a waste of time

to bring it up.

Well, if you act all melodramatic

like that, yeah, it would be.

But if you showed your balls and you

went in there and got in their face...

...and said "listen to this,"

the worst they could do is say no.

Or get mad at you

because you showed your balls.

There you are.

Damon.

Hi. How are you?

- I'm all right. How are you?

- I'm great.

What's going on?

- Hey. Garrett.

- I'm Damon.

- Nice to meet you.

- Nice to meet you.

- We all work together. He is the bartender.

- Oh, wow.

- Cheers.

Cheers.

Where have you been, Damon?

- Um, I was just helping my mom move.

Aw...

No, she's just getting old...

...and I want her to live closer to me,

you know?

Aw...

Gush.

It's funny, because I actually want my

mother to move further away from me.

- Damon is close with his mom.

Good, good, good.

- Well, you know, it's my mom, you know?

So cute.

- "And then my mom. "

- My mom.

Mothers are important.

Yeah, they are.

You wouldn't be here

if it weren't for her vagina.

Found it easy

Easy

Ooh. Shh.

What?

Sorry. Sorry.

Maya. Oh.

Okay.

Hells yeah.

- Icing and vodka.

- Mm.

- That's a great chaser. Mm.

- Mm. Taste it.

So Damon seems like a good guy.

Oh, my God. He's amazing.

- Like my rock.

- Your rock?

Yeah, I wouldn't get through work

without him.

Wow. And he's handsome,

and he loves his mother, and-

- Are you jealous?

- Aw, come on. Come on.

No. Mm-mm.

Yes, you are.

I'm just a little curious if you guys

have ever, you know...

You know. Sorry.

No. No. Not at all.

Oh, my God.

You always gotta close your eyes.

- Hey, Corinne.

Hey.

I'm taking off.

Um, can I help you? I don't know

what happened. It was something-

- No! No! No.

- Oh, God.

- Sorry. No. No thank you. I'm good.

- Okay.

- I'm good.

- I'm so sorry.

Our introduction was not how I imagined

it would be, obviously...

...but that was my hand.

The handprint on my, uh, buttocks...

...and my genitalia.

You have a handprint on your crotch too?

- You ready?

Yes. Great.

- Okay. Well, see you later, Corinne.

- I'll be back soon.

Okay, bye.

Okay, bye.

Have a safe-

What?

Have a safe flight, Garrett.

Thank you. You too-

Or not- You're not flying. Okay.

Oh, yes. Middle seat. Awesome.

And a layover. Be fun.

Thank you for making this trip.

Thank you. That was the best.

I had fun.

I had fun too. Despite everything.

Please, please apologize

to her again for me.

- I will.

- Okay.

- God, she hates me. She does.

- Yeah.

I love you.

I love you too.

I miss you already.

Cruella de ViI

was not based on an actuaI person.

I'm pretty sure she was.

A German lady.

I think you're wrong about that.

Hey, Dan.

Welcome home, buddy boy.

Dude, what the f*** is this?

- We got an open-door policy. It's cooI.

- Why? Why do you have that?

Well, we don't. He does.

I just kind of accept it.

- How was the trip, bro?

It was awesome.

- Do we have beers?

We do have beers.

- Will you grab me one?

Great.

Don't drink a beer on the toilet.

I was worried you'd get dumped...

...and we'd have to go to the bar.

It went well, huh?

No. It was really good.

All the way.

That's all I'm doing.

- Not far enough.

That's as far as I'm going.

- I can't reach.

- That's as far as I go.

I am not gonna hand you a beer

while you're shitting.

- I don't wanna get up.

- Get it afterwards.

I'm pooping as we speak.

I don't wanna have to get up to get a-

Take it. There. Take it.

Thank you!

Enjoy it. All right?

- I'm gonna go.

- It's fine. It's closed now.

Did you tell her you loved her?

- I might have.

- Did you really?

Yeah. I did.

Are you serious?

Wow.

- You gotta be carefuI.

- No.

- You gotta be carefuI.

- Don't tell him he has to be carefuI.

How long have you been together?

- Four months.

That's a very long time.

Stop.

Will you-?

Okay. Four months, all right? So now,

in this four months, how much time...

...do you think you've spent together,

like in the same city? Physically.

- Uh, I don't know.

- Forty days?

- Yeah. Forty days.

- Tops. Yeah?

Sure, that sounds about right.

Now look, I have done the long-distance

thing, and it is hard as hell.

And it doesn't matter how good

the relationship is.

It literally can just rip it apart.

Look, it is just very hard to be away from

the person you love for months at a time.

I know. I know it's not gonna be easy.

That's all I'm saying.

But maybe you never found

the right girI.

That's not a bad point.

- Jesus Christ.

- What are you doing?

You know what?

I want some privacy now. Pardon me.

It's Erin, leave a message.

Well, now I miss you even more.

Thanks a lot.

I'm going to bed,

so call me in the morning.

Okay, good night.

It's barely gonna fit.

The other ones wouldn't have fit.

But you saw the top off

the bigger one and-

What's the point?

Why not get one that's gonna fit?

This one looks little.

People are gonna think we're gay.

Okay, let's open our presents

at the same time.

It's exciting and sad,

since it's the only present I got this year.

Okay.

You did a good wrapping job too.

I hope it's a pony.

Oh... Centipede.

I love it!

That's so awesome.

I love my present.

I love you.

Hyah!

Hyah!

Hey, Corinne.

Can you ask Maya to keep it down

for just a second?

Maya, statue.

Hello.

Hi, um, Hugh Edwards, please.

- This is he.

- Uh, hi. Uh, this is Erin Langford.

- No.

- I was a summer intern for you.

No.

I wrote that piece that you liked

so much on Grant-A-Dream.

- Oh, yeah. How are you?

- I'm good.

Um...

You told me

that I should call you in January...

...about a possible permanent position,

so...

...here I am, calling you.

Oh, right.

Well, look, honestly, we just got done

laying off 100 people...

...so we're not gonna be hiring

any time soon.

Sorry.

Why don't you try blogging? You know?

Heh.

Look, uh, best of luck to you.

- Okay.

- Take care.

Thank you.

F***! F***.

I wanted that job, okay?

I wanted to be in New York.

Look at it this way, it's not like

someone else got the job over you.

They're just not taking anyone.

Yeah, I get it.

It's a bad time for newspapers, okay?

It's not just about the f***ing job.

I wanted to be in the same city as you.

I know. Believe me, I know.

But there are other papers in New York,

right? So that's still a possibility.

I seriously doubt...

...that if a paper like The Sentinel just cut

Yeah, but listen,

you don't know that untiI you try.

You're angry and you're frustrated

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes