Gone with the Bullets Page #4

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- Who?

- Six or Seven?

- Six, I guess.

This way!

Sit!

Read!

Escort Nation President found

Miss Wu-Six will see you now!

We're taking the train

to film the sunset.

Perfect, I can help.

I made films in France.

"A train arrives."

"Another train arrives."

- Say something in French.

- Yes, very good.

Cheese.

At Siruiying Elementary,

I mastered six languages.

My mother taught there.

- What's her name?

- Qi.

My 3rd grade teacher!

Your mother was quite a looker.

Every boy's fantasy.

She enlightened us in many ways.

What'd you do in France?

I was in love...

...and followed this girl home...

...to Loch Lomond.

We sat on its bonny banks...

- ...watching the sun rise and set.

- What happened?

The war started.

I told her, "Wait at the lake.

If I die,

my soul will take the high road...

...and you'll take the low road.

And I'll be home before ye."

Isn't that a Scottish song?

- They sing of me there too?

- You know...

...that you die in that song?

Well, I almost died.

A cannonball exploded near me.

I survived, but I lost my leg.

Lost your leg?

They gave me a wooden one.

Can't tell which one it is, right?

Of course I can!

You kicked me in the good leg!

That one hurts even more.

Wu-Six broke my leg.

She actually broke them both.

She doesn't like show-offs.

They went on to film the sunset

without me.

If only I'd gone with her....

You startled me.

It's been a while. You've aged.

- Really?

- Yes.

You look like a teacher

in those glasses.

I borrowed these, for a disguise.

What have you done?

Is that why you came to see me?

Actually, I hate to trouble you, but....

Trouble me or your Teacher Qi?

- Is she here?

- Xiao Qiang!

Take Mr. Ma to see his Teacher Qi.

Is that a robot?

- Did you build it?

- I'm still monkeying with it.

Oh, destiny, changeable like the moon.

Is that really you,

my beloved Teacher Qi?

Siruiying Elementary, right?

- You recognise me?

- At Siruiying Elementary...

...I was Teacher Qi.

At Yijing High, I was Madam Qi.

At Peking College, I was Principal Qi.

That's how I know your school.

But I can't place you.

- It's Ma Zouri.

- Doesn't ring a bell.

I went by my Manchurian name.

- I sat in the last row.

- Never mind.

- What can I do for you?

- Dear Teacher Qi, I humbly bid you--

What's with "dear teacher"?

- Tell her.

- I was about to.

Mother, he said you were his lover...

...in his dreams.

He said you awoke him.

- Carnally.

- I don't recall saying that.

- Years ago in the train.

- You desired me?

- Sorry.

- Don't be shy.

Few students admit it.

You're the first. You're blushing.

- Disaster!

- Cut the drama!

The old dog is mad.

- He bites the puppy.

- What's going on?

She calls our husband the old dog

and her son a puppy.

- Your son-in-law?

- No, no!

- Why are you holding hands?

- He was my student.

- Prepare dinner.

- Yes, ma'am!

Tell the kitchen, one guest.

- Military songs tonight?

- Always!

Washroom?

Here, here, here again and behind.

All ways lead to a toilet.

- How about I show you?

- You come with me.

- I'll find it. Yes.

- You sure?

Will you ever grow up?

Ma Zouri, time to grovel.

Cat got your tongue?

Am I ashamed to ask for help?

No shame! No shame!

- Who's there?

- It's me, Feitian.

- Help me, Zouri.

- Is that really you?

- What's going on?

- Don't pull, that's a horse bit.

- Horse bit?

- There's a saddle on my back.

Who did this to you?

- General Wu. He said...

- Why?

...I'm not fit to be human.

- He's devolving me into a monkey.

- A monkey?

But you're in the stable.

I'm starting as a horse.

You really offended him.

What'd you do?

Wu-Seven took me out.

His father caught us.

- Whoring?

- What else?

All this for...?

- We screwed Daddy's whores.

- No!

You see that clock?

At midnight...

...he sics those stallions on me.

What? No way!

I don't envy you.

I don't think I can take it.

- I'll unhook you.

- Don't! If I run...

...he'll kill me.

Ask Wu-Six to call off her dad.

Save me, brother.

Charm her.

What time is it?

- 11:
37.

- Twenty-three minutes left for salvation.

- If I can't?

- I'll be double horse-f***ed!

All rise! Sing!

We know what we know

No pretending, none at all

If we don't know, we say so

No pretending, none at all

Always honest, that's our thing

No pretending, none at all

Confucius gave us these words to sing

No pretending at all, none at all

No pretending at all!

No pretending. Period!

- Sit!

- Sit!

- Who the hell is he?

- I'm me.

Are you my son?

Which one is your mother?

- My Teacher Qi.

- Not a son-in-law?

He was my student.

He sees me as a parent.

Get those two bastards in here!

You know what Seven's problem is?

He spends everything

and screws everyone!

- My military budget?

- Spent it on whores.

- My poor puppy!

- Mom...

...stop crying! I'm not dead!

The money was for my cadet school!

The U.S. has West Point.

China needs East Point!

You just want exotic concubines.

I'm fitter than you think!

I want my soldiers to be fit too.

But these two a**holes--

Spent money meant for men...

- ...on women.

- That's right.

- He's got it.

- General...

...you are a man of vision.

If I were younger...

...I'd follow you into battle.

Other generals spend money

on weapons.

You spend it on people.

You should be angry.

Those a**holes deserve to be shot.

Bring me the horse!

Horse-screw them! Then shoot them.

Hold it, sir!

Money isn't the only way

to make our soldiers strong.

- What can we do without money?

- Science!

Science is for improving weapons,

not human beings.

It can also improve the human body.

Don't believe me? I'll prove it.

Can you touch the floor?

- I know I can't.

- Do as I say...

...and you'll be able to immediately.

Don't bullshit me.

Or you'll be horse-hammered...

- ...and shot.

- Let's try something else.

- No need. Go for it!

- Let's do this.

Get up!

- Show me!

- Everybody ready?

- Are you all game?

- Of course.

Raise your hands.

Straighten your legs.

Lower your hands slowly.

- Can you touch the floor?

- No.

That's right. Now follow me.

- Just do this 20 times.

- Begin!

One, two, three, four....

The moment of truth.

Raise your hands.

Reach for the sun. And the moon.

For the stars. For the ocean.

Deep into the ocean.

- I did it!

- Stretching adds years...

- ...to life.

- From now on, we sing before dinner...

...and touch toes afterwards.

But you can touch something else.

Your face.

- What do you feel?

- My beard.

No, your smile.

The smile of a child.

I bet you haven't smiled like this

in 40 years.

You son of a b*tch,

you haven't smiled at me for ages.

I am smiling.

Let me reward you!

- No need.

- I insist. I owe nobody.

- Must I? Let these two go.

- You must.

Shut up!

My general...

...please let them go.

I've never been so humiliated.

That'll teach you...

- ...for being my brother's buddy.

- Yes...

...he is wicked.

Most murder victims

are killed by buddies.

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