Good Luck Charlie: The Movie Page #6

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Hey! I'm helping you.

No, I don't need help.

I can do this on my own.

No you can't, Teddy!

You're not even in the right key.

Dashing through the snow

In a one-horse open sleigh

O'er the fields we go

Laughing all the way

Bells on bob-tails ring

Making spirits bright

Mom!

Shh!

What fun it is

to ride and sing

A sleighing song tonight

Oh, jingle bells,

jingle bells

Jingle all the way

Oh, what fun it is to ride

In a one-horse open

sleigh, hey

That is exactly what the

holidays are like at my house.

This is really good.

Really good.

Take a right up there.

Up where?

There's a little unmarked

road about 100 yards ahead.

Trust me!

I mapped it out!

Oh, if we took that road, it would've

shaved 30 minutes off our trip.

Are you sure?

Trust me, go back and make the turn.

Don't trust him.

I saw a movie that started like this.

How did it turn out?

I don't know.

I got too scared and left the theater.

Oh, I stayed.

The guy driving the car lived.

Good enough for me.

But only for a minute,

then he got eaten by zombies.

Sorry.

We wish you

a Merry Christmas, hey

We wish you

a Merry Christmas, hey

We wish you a Merry Christmas

, and a Happy New Year

Glad tidings we bring

to you and your kin

Glad tidings for Christmas

and a Happy New Year

Oh, bring us

a figgy pudding

Oh, bring us

a figgy pudding

Oh, bring us

a figgy pudding

And bring it right here

We wish you

a Merry Christmas

We wish you a Merry

Christmas Thank you.

We wish you

a Merry Christmas

And a Happy New Year

How'd we do?

Good enough for an $8.99 buffet!

Yeah, yeah, this is

definitely the right move.

Stop!

Except for the guys with guns!

Those guys were not on the map.

Who are you guys?

Are you policemen?

I'm going to need to see some badges.

Badges?

We don't need no stinking badges.

I mean, we could really

be onto something here.

We could be the

next Jersey Boys.

I don't think... I mean, not that we

should take it straight to Broadway.

Let's not get ahead of ourselves.

Exactly.

I mean, we should open

in Chicago or Los Angeles.

You know, just a couple of

months, work out the bugs.

Who should we get to do the music?

Stephen Sondheim or Andrew Lloyd Webber?

Ooh, Elton John.

Whatever, Mom.

Oh, cheer up, kiddo!

Look, if this is...

If this is about Spring Break then...

Yeah?

It's hard.

What, Mom?

What is hard?

Letting go.

You take a trip like that by yourself

and you really are a grown up.

And, well, I just want you to be my baby.

Mom, I'll always be your baby.

And you keep making more babies, so

it's not like you're going to run out.

I wish the rest of them were here.

I'm sorry I ruined Christmas.

Hey, you did not ruin Christmas.

At least we're together.

We can still have pancakes

on Christmas morning,

even if they're six hours

old under a heat lamp.

And they're not shaped

like Christmas trees.

Teddy, you gave me the best present ever!

My own Broadway musical!

Yeah.

Mom, that girl.

She's got our luggage!

She's wearing my purple top!

E e looks better in it than I do!

Hey, wait.

We need a plan.

No, we don't, jump her!

All right, the jig is up.

And you look awful in that top.

I'm sorry.

I'm so, so sorry.

Oh, yeah, well, cry all you want,

'cause we're calling the cops.

No, I swear, I've never done

anything like this before, ever!

I just didn't know what else

to do because I was so hungry.

And I just saw your luggage sitting

there, and I haven't eaten in so long.

Could you please stop crying

so I can call the cops?

I'm sorry!

I'm just so tired and I'm lost

and all I want to do is just go home

but I can't because it's

like a thousand miles away.

And I don't have any money.

How did that happen?

It's a really long story.

We've got time.

Hold still!

It won't help to struggle.

All right, take the blindfolds off.

Okay.

Whatever it is you guys want...

You kn w what we want!

To keep the Stone of Mitrios

out of your dirty yellow hands!

I have no idea what you're

talking about. I do!

Gabe, please!

Look, we're innocent.

We were just on our way to pick

up my wife and my daughter...

Down an unmarked desert road,

after dark, on Christmas Eve?

Do you think I'm stupid?

I have a PhD from Caltech!

Really? Oh, then you're smart enough

to know that kidnapping is a felony.

Good one.

You're very convincing.

Look, you tell Jablowsky,

whatever trick he was trying

to pull with you, it didn't work.

We are going to grind you under our boots.

And there's no way

you're getting the Stone.

We don't even know what that is!

I do!

And we're going to miss Christmas!

What did you say?

I know exactly what's happening!

We're in the middle of Live Death!

Which is?

Okay, so every Christmas

Eve, Chuck Jablowsky,

the multi-gazillionaire

who invented Galaxy of Death,

he hosts this legendary paintball

tournament based on the game.

It's like a giant video game come to life!

Why does he do it on Christmas Eve?

Because half the programme

who work for him are Hindu.

And the other half are antisocial

nerds who have no life.

I'm starting to realize why there

weren't any hot girls in that crowd.

Yeah, it's a shame.

How long does the game last?

Until either the Yellow team

captures the Stone of Mitrios,

or the Red team wipes them all out.

Usually takes a couple of days.

So we're stuck here till after Christmas?

Well, not if we escape!

All right, you know what, let's

scoot our chairs back to back

and then, maybe we could

untie the ropes, all right.

Here we go.

All right, working already, huh?

Wait, no, Dad.

Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad...

No, no, no, no! Ow.

Ow

Gabe, you bumped me out of position!

You bumped me!

Sit still!

This was my idea!

Let me do what I got to do!

Yes, but I'm smaller and more agile!

Well, I'm bigger and you

need to listen to me!

Dad's right.

How did you get free?

My arms are all lubed up

with sunburn ointment.

Slipped them right out.

Untie us!

Oh, yeah, yeah!

Wow, that's really easy to undo.

I guess Caltech doesn't have

a knot tying requirement.

All right, let's go.

Wait, wait, wait...

We might have to shoot our way out.

Good idea.

Here goes.

Yes!

All right!

Okay, boys, are we ready?

Yeah!

All right!

On three.

One, two, three!

Wow. Okay, on three.

One, two, three!

One, two, three!

Come on!

Allow me.

Thank you.

Nobody in here.

Hey, remember us?

Where's our car?

Can't talk, already dead!

Oh, come on!

Rules are rules for

a reason, okay, l? l?

Give us a break, man!

It's Christmas Eve!

We're not like you!

We have lives!

Hey, man, I chose to be here!

Yeah.

Guys, you gotta check out this map!

Oh, does it prove I was

right about the shortcut?

Oh, other than the part

where we got kidnapped?

Can you find our car on this thing?

I think it's over there,

past the Tower of Doom.

But we're deep in Red team territory.

If we run for it, we'll probably

just get kidnapped again.

On the other hand...

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