Handsome: A Netflix Mystery Movie Page #2

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He's in a boat,

but he's a helicopter pilot. I loved it.

- I loved it.

- I loved it.

What would you do if you had a partner

who didn't like how loud you talk?

I don't talk loud. You talk loud.

I don't know who talks louder between us,

you or I.

We both talk very loud...

...and I don't know

which one is the louder talker.

Good morning, everybody.

- Everybody's looking sharp.

- What do we got goin' here?

- Holy sh*t.

- What the f*** is this?

I can't believe it. No way.

Fleur... I think I know this girl.

- You do?

- Yeah.

That's my neighbor's sitter.

I tried giving her cookies yesterday.

- What do you mean, "tried"?

- I tried. She wouldn't take them.

She's a very cautious young lady.

She wouldn't even open the door.

- She knows the person who did this.

- Absolutely.

All right, has anyone else noticed this?

But it looks like her body's put

into the shape of the Star of David.

- Oh, man.

- Jesus.

Jesus.

Jesus.

Sir, can I quit the force forever, please?

- You wanna quit the force?

- Yeah.

Why?

'Cause we're all sitting here casually,

talking about this chopped up woman

in this yard, and it's disgusting.

We're not casually talking about the lady.

We're trying to figure out who did this.

- Sir, I have a theory.

- You do? What do you got?

Suicide.

- That's it?

- That's it.

- I deduce that that's stupid.

- Hey, easy. We're all trying here.

Sorry, Detective Burt Jerpis, sir.

I know, Jerpis. Go ahead.

What do you got?

This is a drive-by, plain and simple.

- How do you get that?

- I'll show you, sir.

Our victim was out for a walk.

A leisurely, late night walk.

Along comes our perp,

driving a late '90s Honda Accord,

purple...

That's my gut feeling.

Then this punk...

and that's what he is,

takes out a gun, shoots our victim.

What's on the gun?

A silencer. Why is there a silencer?

To keep things quiet.

Then, to cover his tracks...

he chops the body up into these pieces

and arranges them

into this religious symbol.

- Case closed.

- No, not case closed.

We don't have a bullet wound,

and we don't have a killer.

Oh...

- That's why you're the boss.

- All right, who's the king of the castle?

The house belongs to Talbert Bacorn.

- The actor?

- Yeah, yeah. I'd bend him over.

Uh, and then what?

What do you mean? I'd just bend him over.

Eat a little popcorn out his ass.

- Okay, I'll do the interview with Bacorn.

- Mmm-hmm.

- Okay. What about me?

- You take care of that.

Ah.

Guys, on the right is the home

of Talbert Bacorn,

the star of Rainbow Squad.

- Do what you gotta do.

- Done.

I'm... I'm freaking out!

Of course you're freaking out.

There's a crime scene in your front yard.

Okay. Do you think

someone is... is threatening me?

Do you think they're trying

to send me a message?

What do you think that message is?

- Do you think PETA is trying to ambush me?

- PETA?

I wore suede pants

at my premire.

Well, I don't think

that's really their style.

Why don't you just sit down and breathe?

Do breathing exercises?

No, not formally.

Just sit down, kick back, breathe.

All right, let's go. Keep it moving.

There's nothing to see here.

They want to know if that's

a decapitated body on Mr. Talbert's lawn.

No.

She thinks we're stupid

because we don't speak English.

Why would she assume

we don't speak English?

Because we're a bus full of tourists

from Japan who don't speak English.

Is the body arranged carefully

in the shape of a Star of David?

Is the body carefully

arranged in the shape of a Star of David?

Unequivocally no.

What's a Star of David?

It's a symbol for Judaism.

Rabbi?

The Magen David is said to symbolize

the shape of King David's shield,

but there is really no support for that

claim in any early rabbinic literature.

In my opinion.

Tell me about last night.

What did you see? What happened?

You may have saw or heard something

that you're not even aware of.

Ah, so true.

An actor's senses are so finely attuned.

Like a detective's.

Mmm...

Probably a little better

than a detective's,

but a little worse than a blind man

whose fingertips are so sensitive,

he can make words out of bumps.

Back to last night...

- What went on?

- Last night, last night...

Well... I pet sit

for my next-door neighbor,

so I went next door and fed the dog.

- You pet sit?

- I do.

Are you close with the neighbor?

You love dogs?

I seize any opportunity

to add to my actor's toolbox.

Should I have the opportunity to play

a pet sitter in some future project,

I know how they'll feel.

That's a real dedication to your craft.

It's my life.

When you were over there, did you see

anybody walkin' around, coming, going?

No, nothing. It was all quiet.

Not a creature was stirring on my lawn.

Well, I really don't think

the victim would've been stirring.

So you come back from your neighbor's.

You're home. What next?

Well... I got undressed for bed,

and I watched my movie!

Yes, it was on cable.

It's an old movie of mine from 1985.

Patty-Cake. I played Emil,

the baker man's illegitimate son.

- I think I remember that one.

- Mmm.

It's an early work, but underrated.

The scene where I'm crying and chanting,

"Patty-cake, patty-cake. "

I hold up my little hands

for my father to clap them,

and he rejects me.

Still holds up.

So, you're watching the movie.

Did you hear anything?

Mmm...

No.

Okay.

Uh, if you think of anything else,

please give me a call.

Do not text me. I don't enjoy it.

So you'll send me a special police detail

for my protection?

We're gonna keep an eye on things.

Don't worry.

Oh, thank you.

I'm used to a lot of attention.

You do know it's the ex-boyfriend,

don't you?

- Lieutenant Kenda.

- Detective Handsome.

Do not worry.

I've got all the angles covered.

It's always the ex-boyfriend.

It's the old, "If I can't have you,

no one will have you. "

- You see chopped up bodies a lot?

- Not a lot, but I've seen them.

You know what that says?

"To kill you is not enough.

I want to punish you. "

Very personal. Very close.

- Have you been stretching like I said?

- Occasionally.

You need to do it more than occasionally.

Limbers you up.

Hey!

Oh, sh*t.

Sorry, I thought you were my sitter.

Yeah, about that...

I'm, uh, Gene Handsome,

detective with the LAPD

and, coincidentally,

your next door neighbor.

- Oh, hi. Nice to meet you.

- Hi.

- Oh, sh*t. Did Heather get arrested?

- Why would you say that?

Sticky fingers. Yeah, she's stolen

a few of my going-out tops,

but it's really hard

to find a good sitter.

Well, I've got some bad news.

This is so brutal.

And then to get chopped up like that?

- Yeah. It's tough.

- Oh, my God. Poor Heather.

It's terrible. And, uh,

what was your relationship with her?

Was she close to you guys?

Was she like family?

She... Eh...

She... she was the babysitter.

But, you know, nice.

She was fine.

- Oh, hey, honey.

- Hi there.

Uh, this is my daughter, Carys.

Carys, this is Detective Handsome.

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