Happy, Texas Page #6

came for that beauty pageant?"

I'll think about you.

Just want to make sure

you got somethin' of me with you.

You want some coffee?

Hang on a second.

I'll be right there.

I didn't mean to be rude.

I just wanted to get out of that robe.

So, I take it this is your

"I stayed up all night" look...

as opposed to your

"I'll get up early and go get

Josephine some breakfast" look.

That bad, huh? I guess I should

be flattered by your stalking.

It's such a fine line between

stalking and being attentive...

and I was, I don't know

being attentive.

How's Glen?

Oh. He's gone.

I know. I saw him leave.

No, I mean he's gone gone.

Yeah.

I told him it was over, and...

he said, "Fine" he wasn't havin'

all that much fun anyway.

Very adult of him.

I mean, I was at least hopin'

for some tears...

or a tantrum or somethin'.

Well, how about that, huh?

You all right?

No. Which is stupid.

I mean, it's not like anything

he said was such a big surprise.

It's just that...

I had this big speech

all worked out, right

about how I didn't want

to be second any more...

how I wanted a relationship

that felt...

permanent, you know

not just convenient...

how I wanted to be part

of a couple that did things as a...

as a couple, you know?

I wanted him to talk to me

the way that you did...

Iook at me, pay attention to me

the way that you do.

I mean...

That's not too much to ask, right?

It's not too much to want.

Joe.

Joe.

God.

I wish...

Here.

You're great.

You are. You're great.

You'll meet somebody.

You'll meet someone.

Yeah.

And with my luck

he'll turn out to be gay.

Jesus! I'm in the crosswalk!

I'm walkin' here!

All right.

All right, outside. Let's go.

Hey, you and me, we ain't talkin'.

I know what you're doin' here.

It's not right.

Hi there.

Sure lookin' forward

to that pageant this afternoon.

Listen

I am not waitin' for you...

to clean this place out

this afternoon and I get zip.

I'm going to sign for my other 250

which I have more than earned...

and then...

Morning, boys.

Piss on you, I am gone.

Wait, wait, wait. Two fifty?

Saw Liberace one time

in Laughlin.

Great show. He's an all right fella too.

Like y'all

but sittin' at the far end of

that counter, if you know what I mean.

Would you excuse us?

Oh, sure.

Two fifty? You're here to sign

for the other half of the salary?

I thought you were gonna rob the bank.

Me? I'm not robbin' the bank.

You're robbing the bank.

I'm not robbing the bank!

It was your idea.

Yeah, it was my idea

but now it's not.

I think I'm falling in love.

With the sheriff

or the banker?

With Joe.

Bad luck.

Boys, in case no one else

got around to tellin' ya

we sure do appreciate

what y'all done around here.

Yep, sure do.

That's it.

See you both at the show.

Hey. You done

a good job, Wayne.

Better than I could've done

with those kids.

You're a good partner. You take

my share. It's time for me to go.

Buenos dias, girls.

I got my new car parked outside.

Y'all want to come look at it?

Next.

Ain't life funny

us back together again.

Kind of like a Kodak commercial.

Imagine my surprise

when I come out of my hole...

where I've been waitin' for things to

cool off a little bit, and who do I see?

In my bank.

Goat boy's girlfriend here.

So, tell me, girlfriend... tell me

about your plan to get my money.

Or if we can just do my plan

but I always figured...

killin' a bunch of people

makes for a slower getaway.

All right, I'll give you the combo.

Hey. Alarm.

Thank you, Wayne.

What about that?

Don't worry about the alarm. I'll cut the

alarm. If it's on a reset switch

it'll it'll

start before you...

What about that?

Lt'll be on for a second or two.

I'll coordinate the break in

with... with something loud.

What's loud?

Well, when my girls come on stage

that entrance music is pretty loud.

David!

How you doin'?

When?

Quarter of 4:
00.

Okay. 3:
45, I cut the alarm

then you're on your own.

How... How long has he been in there?

Huh?

In the bathroom. How long

do you think he's been in there?

What's it matter?

L... I was thinkin'...

if he has the cramps or somethin'

we could surprise him.

What are you gonna do

jump him in the can?

I can take him. No, you can't.

I think I can take him.

Wayne, I hate to be the one to tell

you this, but you're a lousy fighter.

Well, at least I ain't actin'

like a pee waddlin' hound...

handin' out the combination

of my girlfriend's bank!

I am not helping him.

All right, I am helping him.

But it's better this way.

It's better

that no one gets hurt.

You should've seen it.

Lifted me right off the seat.

I could've named it Flipper.

Hey! You both look, uh

que bonita.

Just like everything's normal.

That's good.

Steven, it's me, Chappy.

Who's Chappy?

The sheriff.

You get rid of him right quick

or else I will.

Getting dressed.

Just a second.

Hey, Chappy. Hey.

Hey, you.

I wasn't tryin' to catch you

with just your drawers on, I promise.

Hey, David.

How are you?

I thought I'd stop and visit for a bit

before the festivities begin.

Uh, I got a line

on some transportation for you.

It ain't pretty

but it'll get you where you're goin'.

I'm sorry.

Am I interrupting something?

Yeah, you sort of are right now.

Oh, I'm sorry, Steven.

I'm... Think I'm bein'

a little selfish right now

and it's your last day

in town and all...

and I'm tryin' to fit in

as much time as I possibly can.

Me and the boys are fixin' up

your, uh... your RV there.

We're gonna tow it to El Paso.

I think we can, um...

Chappy, I need you to go.

I can stay out of your way here

till you're done.

No, I don't want you

in here right now, all right?

Of course.

Sure. All right.

Um, we still goin' to sit together

durin' the show, right?

No. No, I don't think so.

What? What are you talkin' about?

Will you just go away!

I don't want to sit with you tonight.

I don't want to see you back here again.

I don't want you looking for me

after the show.

Steven if there's somethin' I've done...

Here.

No.

I must have been out of my mind...

wasting my time with some...

redneck hick sheriff...

with bug eyes

and two left feet.

Just leave me alone.

It's nice my new amigo

is so concerned about his friends.

We don't have to worry

about how this is gonna go down.

Let's do it.

All right.

Around, around.

Like that?

Like that.

And around the other way.

Hi.

Hi.

Okay, everyone. I hope we're all ready.

Come on. Come on. Come here.

Okay. Do you think

we should pray?

Yeah.

Yeah. Why don't you go ahead.

All right.

Bow your heads.

What about hold hands?

All right. Let's hold hands.

Okay. Yeah.

Okay, God

just want you to look down

on these girls here.

They're like little flowers...

and the rain you send 'em...

gotta be gentle and sweet.

We come to you today

and we ask you to just help 'em...

help us grab this pageant

by the balls and rip 'em off.

I mean, if those judges

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes