Happy Tears Page #4

l'm the one going, not you, Joe.

Why the hell do l have to go

to the goddamn airport?

Christ, do l have to call a cab?

Get...

in...

the car.

- l'm gonna need cab fare on the other end.

- My purse is on-

- l know where it is.

- You always do. Come on.

Anything interesting?

Arsenic levels.

l remember

when asbestos was a godsend.

Yeah, if you don't care

about people getting cancer.

Well, it's not bad

if you don't f*** with it.

Yeah, like it wasn't bad to smoke

around Mommy when she had cancer?

He quit.

After she died, yeah,

because he got scared

for his own precious life.

Gee, it must be a happy place

inside that brain of yours.

Remember when we were kids,

and l used to take you to the park

after school sometimes?

Yeah. l was just

thinking about that.

- About how nice that was.

- Eyes front.

So did you ever wonder why l did that?

You...

wanted to play with me.

- Right?

- No.

Why was l always waiting

outside the house?

You want to tell her, Joe?

Tell me what?

Why are you getting me all, like-

Mommy was at school, right?

- Sometimes till almost dinnertime.

- Okay.

- Okay, so think about it.

- l'm thinking about it.

- Did you ever wonder why it smelled-

- No, l never wondered anything.

...like strawberries

when we got back?

Why?

Obviously because he had

his lady friends there.

Not all of them were hookers.

Some were family friends.

What-

What's he talking about?

You've had your whores

in the house since-

l don't know. Since when, Joe?

Jayne. Jayne. Sh*t.

Are you kidding me? Jesus!

Jayne!

That's my girl!

That's a nice shortcut.

- Since when? You didn't answer the question.

- Just take it easy.

- l think you get the general idea now.

- Let it go! Stop controlling me!

Since when, Daddy?

Since the beginning?

Pretty much so.

You know what? l didn't mind

all these years protecting you.

But then l started to realize

that's like lying to her.

And l don't like being lied to.

And then l find this receipt.

A receipt for a pair of boots.

A single pair of boots. Blue boots.

Purchased in San Francisco

on the very day and at the very time

you were fogged in

in the Oakland Airport.

- And not for $500.

- Okay-

No. For $2,800.

$2,800 plus tax.

You know what? l've been cleaning up

your sh*t my whole life.

l have done everything right,

and you're a total f***-up!

- So how come you get to be rich?

- Eyes front!

That's just a pulled muscle.

It'll smart for a few days.

Otherwise, you're fine.

We're releasing you.

Right now?

We're keeping your sister

and your father for observation

because Laura has

that bruising to her abdomen,

and Joe just because of his age.

But physically, let me tell you,

he's an ox.

But you can count on coming for them

at about this time.

That's 10 p.m. tomorrow evening.

What about my pain?

Ordinary Motrin should be sumicient

for your shoulder.

Can't we do a little

better than sumicient?

Must be on his way.

That's very impressive, Mr. Deacks,

but let's cover it up.

Hey, hey, hey.

Do you have a mate for this?

You know, we sure don't.

But you can have this one for a dime.

Oh, brother.

Leave the mattresses.

Everything else- go for it.

And...60 bucks

for that Oriental picture.

- It's nice.

- What about this here?

l don't know. What do you think? 50?

- l think so, too.

- l can't believe he's finally-

Well, that he's really moving out.

We're gonna take him home.

A nursing home.

- Really?

- Yeah. Watch your back.

lt's 75 bucks for the couch, guys.

That's including the laundry.

That's clean laundry, fellas.

- Not this.

- Yeah.

- Now, how about this?

- What about this here?

- Take it.

- Say again?

Take it. Take it. Take it.

Just take it all!

- Pardon me.

- That's fair.

- Can l have a look at your inventory?

- What? Oh, yes.

Please do. We've got lots of stum.

We're selling-

lt's Americana, that thing.

l already turned down

an omer of 100.

Yeah, it's very nice.

- How much you want for it?

- 175.

That's a bit steep.

l just didn't fall om the banana truck.

You're not from around here, are you?

- No, l'm just visiting.

- l have a feeling you know

a lot more about this kind of stum

than l do- antiques and such.

Well, l'm no expert on Americana.

You know, l like this little thing, too.

My mother collected all of this.

She had a pretty good eye,

don't you think?

Yes.

l'll tell you what. l'll give you

both the things for an even 2.

Hundred.

Fair enough.

This spinning wheel's

a collector's item.

You could sell this and make

a fortune in New York.

- Wouldn't that be neat?

- Yeah.

l like your boots.

Love the color.

Go away!

Go away!

- Sorry.

- Jackson?

- What? What's so funny?

- Get out.

No. It's me.

What are you doing here?

l'm supposed to fix your yard back.

Then go ahead. Fix it.

- l got to pee.

- Well, l'm taking a bath.

No problem. It's-

lt smells good in here.

Do you mind?

Here. l'll-

Get it. Got it?

That's about it.

You got any more?

l wish.

l thought you had to pee.

l can hold it.

That was pretty heavy back there,

with your dog and all.

- When did she die?

- Seven years ago.

Get out.

- Why?

- Mine, too.

Do you remember me?

Never mind. It's just-

The hospital.

Right.

Those were sad times.

You know what's weird?

Our mothers and our dogs

died at the same time.

Not- Not like all of them at the,

- you know, the same-

- l know what you mean.

Well, anyway,

l remember you.

Really?

Yeah.

Why?

Because.

Because why?

l'll see what's up.

Thank you.

You okay?

Yeah. Yeah.

Oh, Mommy.

lt's f***ing biblical out there.

So cold.

Oh, my God.

You need a ride home?

Not really.

So...

you want to hang out?

l- l don't have a TV anymore,

and there's not much food,

and...

What do they do?

Does it matter?

Not really.

Everything turns out for the best.

Well, that was stupid.

Oh, God. Thank God.

Oh, thank God.

Jesus.

- Thank you.

- Shut up, Ray.

Now get downstairs

and keep an eye on the old man.

- Where is this?

- l can't believe l OD'd.

l'm sorry.

- F***ers!

- Joe!

l can't leave you alone

for a minute, can l?

Did Jackson go?

What do you think?

Do you know anything?

Where is my f***ing guitar?

- What happened to all my-

- Sh*t.

Yard sale? A brainstorm.

God, yes, let's send it

all back where it came from.

So tell me.

Stop yelling at me!

How was it?

Wow. It was mind-blowing.

lt was incredible...

at first, but then-

l mean, like, shot

his load in ten seconds.

- l'm sorry?

- Because he's a young guy.

l mean, they reboot quick, but-

l'm talking about the drug.

We didn't have sex.

Oh, my-

Why did you let me go on

believing in that fairy tale?

Why do you think Laurent and l

had you move out near us

after you got married?

Easy access to our bank account?

No, not at all.

Maybe a little?

The thought of you and Jackson

raising a child really scared us,

if you want to know.

Then you'll be happy

to know that Jackson

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