Hard Ball Page #4

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I'll give you two loge seats

for the Bulls/Mavericks on Sunday.

- For the pizza?

- For the pizza.

Done deal.

Yo, Coach! If I get a home run next

game, you gotta buy me pizza again.

Every run I score,

I get one slice.

You bustas is trippin'.

Only me gettin' pizza every game.

MVP--

Most Valuable Pizza eater.

Yo, Coach,

I should be pitching.

- You wanna pitch, Miles?

- Yes, sir.

- Yeah. You can pitch on Wednesday.

- Yes!

Coach, is there any chance

that we'll get trophies this year?

Let's see.

There are eight teams

in the league...

play everyone twice--

We gotta win more games

than we lose.

- Yes!

- So we go to the 'ship, right?

- Yeah, we could.

- Man, we goin' to the 'ship.

We goin' to the 'ship, whoa.

We goin' to the 'ship.

All right, Andre.

This is it, right?

Don't you wanna

see my house?

Sure.

What?

Everyone's sittin' on the floor.

You stay below the window.

What?

Bullets.

What do you do

around here for fun?

Play baseball with you.

- See ya on Wednesday.

- Okay.

Safe!

You ready, Miles?

Want me to hold

your Walkman?

Come on, Miles.

You do your stuff now.

- Let's go, pitcher!

- Come on, Miles!

- Strike!

- Damn.

Strike!

- Strike! Out!

- Sh*t.

- What's he listenin' to?

- Same song...

- over and over.

- What is it?

"Big Poppa" by Notorious B.I.G.

Want one of his tapes?

He made five of 'em.

How's it go?

I love it when you call me Big Poppa

He waves his hand in the air

if you a true player

I see some ladies tonight

that should be havin' my baby, baby

Strike!

Strike! Out!

Strike! Strike!

Strike! Out!

We won our last game.

Miles is an amazing pitcher.

Oh, I heard.

Nine to three over the Gandas.

I'm just helping out till

my colleague returns from New York.

- You're great to take the time out.

- Hey, listen...

why don't we have

dinner tonight?

What good is an expense account

if you don't pad it once in a while?

I can't.

It's a school night.

- Maybe some other time.

- After the game on Saturday?

- Saturday.

- The boys would love you to come.

- Maybe.

- Maybe.

You're not really tryin'

to get Miss Wilkes, are you?

- No. Why?

- Good.

'Cause I already tried,

and she ain't havin' it.

Do it, Jamal!

Kofi wanna come back...

but first I have to

"regotiate" his contract.

- Ball one!

- Okay.

- What are the terms?

- One, you tell Andre...

that Kofi's the best player.

Two, only Kofi gets pizza

when he hits a home run.

Three, if he whacks it over the

gate, he gets a pizza to take home.

One, when the season's over, the

team votes on who's the best player.

Two, Kofi can have the same

pizza bonuses as everyone else.

Three, if he hits it

over the fence...

I'll buy him a pizza.

Okay. Let me discuss

the regotiations with my client.

Put your back into it,

Jefferson!

Here! Light this sucker up!

- Go, baby!

- One more run!

What's up, Coach?

Kofi Evans.

- I spoke to your agent.

- I can come back?

If it's cool with the team.

But you start sh*t with Andre...

and you're done-- okay?

- Run!

- You're out!

Two, four, six, eight,

who do we appreciate?

The Kintus! The Kintus!

Yea, Kintus!

You're great with them.

Thanks.

Are we on for tonight?

- Tonight? I don't know.

- It's not a school night.

Come on--

just for dinner.

Look, the place is well-lit.

People can hear your screams.

I'm not sure. Where?

It's on the corner

of Clark and Addison-- Slugger's.

How 'bout 9:
00?

- All right.

- All right?

Yeah.

Did you miss a payment

with the Barber?

Yeah.

I shined him this week. Why?

That goofy dork Gino

came into Duffy's asking for you.

Oh, Jesus.

- Ticky, this is Ed.

- Ed.

- How you doin'?

- Pleasure.

This is Conor O'Neill.

He wanted to meet you.

What do you do

for money?

I'm a trader

at Smyth and Stevens.

Bullshit. First lie.

You gonna beat me one time so you

can pay off whoever else you owe?

- I wanna make a big bet.

- How big?

- Twelve grand.

- And?

And, if I win...

I wanna get paid.

No bullshit to keep bettin' it.

This guy's too serious.

I got a handful of clients,

they lay a hundred grand a week.

- They're not emotional about it.

- I can cover it.

You seem too emotional about

this 1 2 grand. Desperate.

What are you,

a psychiatrist or a bookie?

Don't you want your number?

You gonna take my bet?

- Ed, what's the next number?

- 27.

You're account 27 when you call in.

And your handle is?

Kekambas.

What? Kekambas?

- Kekambas.

- Ed, you got it?

- Got it.

- You're a strange kid, Kekambas.

I'm interested to see

what happens with you.

Gino, get him.

F*** this.

Account 27. Kekambas.

Yeah. What's the line on Chicago

tomorrow night against Miami?

Gimme Miami minus six.

Twelve grand.

Wait. Wait.

I'll take Chicago

and the six points.

Yeah. Twelve thousand.

- Let's eat.

- Okay.

Why don't we sit?

So, I wanted to talk to you.

Yeah, I wanted to talk

to you too.

- Do you want a drink?

- No.

What's wrong?

I come here all the time

with the guys I work with.

Look, I know you don't work

at Smyth and Stevens.

Look at you. I could tell

right away you weren't a broker.

What's that mean?

Nothing. You just don't look like

you work at Smyth and Stevens.

You look like a freakin'

boring schoolteacher.

Hey, why'd you come here?

To bust me in the lie

about where I work? You win.

You coach my kids.

I thought we had a common interest.

Elizabeth, I get paid under

the table to coach that team.

And I only do that...

'cause I'm in a big hole with two

bookies who are lookin' to kill me.

- What?

- Nothing.

You know all this.

I spoke to Jimmy Fleming after

Jefferson got beat up. He told me.

- You just think I'm a big joke.

- No!

You know, it's people like me

that make people like you...

feel better about your tiny life.

This is unbelievable. I can't

believe I came down here for this.

Yeah? Then why did you come

if you know I'm a liar?

Because those kids trust you.

And they don't trust anybody.

- I told you, I coach for money.

- Well, I teach for money.

I've had the best fifth graders in

the world, but some don't make it.

There's nobody besides their mother

or me telling them what to do.

So what?

I'm done with all that.

Well, I just came down here

to see what they see...

because they're never wrong.

Take a good look.

See what they see.

- I came to talk to you about a job.

- Yeah?

Well, unless it pays

I'm not interested.

- Did you play it?

- Yeah.

- Twelve grand? Yes!

- Twelve grand.

- Coach! Can we have a word?

- How many points you givin'?

I'm getting six.

You took Chicago?

Are you on crack?

- You laid 1 2 grand on those--

- I'm under a lot of pressure.

- I said now!

- Win or lose, I'm outta here.

- Darryl Mackey, league's president.

- We met.

Coach, we're concerned about the age

Of some of the boys on your team.

Can you produce birth

certifiicates for your players?

All I got is what Coach Fleming

at Smyth and Stevens gave me.

Here they are.

What are the names of those

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