Head Office Page #6

we tell ourselves. We're only doing the dirty stuff

to get the power. It'll give us the freedom to do all the good things

we really want. And you get the power,

and you can't goddamn remember what it was you wanted the

freedom for in the first place. [footsteps and door shutting] Looks like you need someone. Looks like you

could use somebody. [synthesized pop music] What are you

listening to? Dylan. Don't you think that you

already said enough, or does your mouth

never stop? Look at these. Where'd you get this? (Max)

Over there. She was handing them out

by the door. Where is she? I guess she's gone. Sorry, man. There's something

deep inside that says love me forever. It's a sad but natural fact. It's just a waste of time. Yeah, I was at the park. I'll see you later. Yeah, right. Hi. Are you really handing these

things out on a Saturday night? Are you following me? Yes, I'm following you. I thought of everything

you said and everything

you stand for, and I want to dance

with you. It's really nothing personal. I just--I don't dance

with company men. I'm not a company man. I'm going to be fired

any day. I really don't want to. Yet another cigarette, hoping this one

helps you to forget this thing

I'm remembering. Hey, do you realize

you're dancing with a new corporate

vice president? You did it, man. He just got promoted yesterday. Promoted? Just a second ago, you told me

you were going to be fired! I can explain that. You see, it's just a temporary

promotion until I'm fired. You're not going to do that. You're not going to-- You did it. Thank you. No, no! You're going to die. [screaming] What do you think,

Jack? Perfect. Perfect. That's perfect. This is perfect. I'm perfect. [exhaling slowly] (Max)

Since the 1984 oil discovery

in New Guinea, we have sold

the Buclais hill tribesmen 12 of our S-24 Skywolf

super-pursuit fighters at $21 million per unit. That's $252 million. This has started a local

arms race between the Buclais and their local neighbors,

the Klaclais. Now, the Klaclais also happen

to be sitting on quite a large amount

of oil. And the Klaclais

now want to buy 20 of our new S-24 Slash X-ray

ultra-pursuit fighters for $480 million. What are the chances

of a war between them? Very good, sir. Our spare-parts-replacement

contracts could be very lucrative. Who trains

their flight personnel? Well, as near

as we can assess it, um, they don't

actually fly the planes. They--they sort of

roll them downhills, crashing them

into each other. Personally, I think

it's a shameful waste of incredible kill power. Make the deal. (both)

Absolutely. Next! Mr. Chairman, we are

a company on the move. I have two mega stocks and a super promotional idea

that can bring INC $500 million to $1 billion

in gross revenues! That is not about white power! Nor is it about black power! It is about green power! Money! M-O-N-E-Y! We're talking

about geometric progression. 1, 2, 4, 8, 16! The numbers boggle the mind! So in conclusion, all we have to do is

to get off the dime and put the show on the road! Thank you very much. Next. Arthur W. Harris,

969 Columbus Avenue, security guard,

unemployed, single unit, baby blue princess model,

three months overdue on a balance of $188.64. Huh, disconnect. Why does Mr. Helmes review

individual phone bills? He feels it keeps him

in touch with the people. (Bob)

Unemployed,

wall unit, push-button, black 25-foot flexi-cord, 10 weeks over-- Not him again? Ten weeks overdue

on a balance of $154.88. Disconnect. He does claim the check is

in the mail, sir. We own the goddamn mail service. I know what's in it

and what's not! And his check is not in my mail! Disconnect. Next. We're all set to close

Allenville, um-- Friday. Expect any trouble down there? Nothing to speak of. TV cameras and the handful

of the usual protesters. Maybe we ought to send

somebody down there to tell our side of the story. [clinking and rolling] [clinking] Exactly what is our side

of the Allenville story? We're losing money

hand over fist. That's not true. No, but it's our side

of the story. Lesson number 47: there are

no truths, only stories. Just let me do the talking. [clicking] [inhaling sharply] [sniffling and exhaling] Yeah. Max. Do you ever think

there's something profoundly wrong with the world when a company like ours

produces hair removal cream and nuclear warheads? [inhaling sharply] No. [exhaling deeply] [new wave music playing] (Max)

Sal, you want a hit? (Sal)

No, thanks, sir. I'm getting a pretty good

contact high as is. (man)

I'm Pilate and Jesus. (Max)

Uh, Sal, Sal, isn't that the Allenville exit

we just passed? I think you're

right, sir. Yeah, it said Allenville,

you know? Uh, I have

a plan, sir. I can go to the next exit;

whip around. Eh, it'd be no problem,

I think. Great. Uh, Sal, keep your eye

on the road. Great. (man)

I once hid my lust

for stardom like a filthy-- Hey, Sal, look,

isn't this the Allenville exit coming up here again? Sal, uh-- Sir, sir, I think

that was it again. Yeah, I think so, man,

because, you know, it just said Allenville. I could back up, sir. Uh, no, no. Don't do-- I could back up. No, it's a bad idea. No, it's cool. Sir, sir, I could--

I could U-ey right here. No, no,

that's okay, Sal. There's not--

we're only a half hour late. It's no problem. [both snorting and giggling] [jeers] This is death. Let's get the hell

out of here. Jack, where are you--

Jack, what are you doing? Jack! Max, this is a very big

turn-out here for us. Jack, get back in the car. Get back in the ca-- Sal.

Yes, sir? Keep the motor running. Uh, I'm not going

to do that, sir. It could heat up. Sal, do me a favor. Sir?

Don't call me, sir. These people are going

to think I'm in charge. Call me Max. Max.

Max. No problem, Max. [jeers] (man)

Are you from

the Allenville office? Yes.

No, no. Did you people expect

this sort of reaction? It's amazing. Actually, we expected

people to be upset, but we're not anticipating

any trouble. [glass shattering] What'd I do? Well, well, you guys

finally did it. "The company who cares

about people," right? Most of these people

will be on unemployment, because there are

no other jobs in town. And when that fails,

it's welfare for the lucky ones

who qualify. Is it true that this plant

is still a viable operation and that INC's relocating it

to Central America because the labor

is cheaper there? I think so.

No. [man on TV]

Is it true that INC stands to gain more in tax write-offs if the plant fails than if it operates

at a moderate profit? I-I think so. You think so? You think so? You're there to deny that sh*t. Jack. Doesn't INC have

a moral responsibility to these workers

to keep this plant and these jobs

in the U.S.? Jack! Uh, moral responsibility? Is that Jack? You haven't answered

my question. Jesus Christ, it is Jack. Does INC have a responsibility

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