Hello, My Name Is Doris Page #6

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- Try to be patient.

- Fine.

Great, Doris.

This should give you a sense

of the way it works.

Do you wanna try another one?

How about...?

- How about these magazines here?

- Um....

- Donate.

- Good.

No, no, actually, I changed my mind.

I'm thinking that I would really like

to finish them one day.

- Fine.

- Yeah.

- That's no problem.

- Okay.

- How about these empty containers?

- Keep.

- Keep? Are you sure?

- Keep. Yes. Yes.

I feel that they're going

to be very useful at one point.

What about this, uh, bowl

of shampoo bottles?

- Keep. Yes.

- Really?

- Doris?

- Yes. Keep.

- You think you'll need shampoo bottles?

- There may be a shortage...

...and then people have to come to me

for shampoo, and I really....

- What? What are you doing? No, no, no.

- I am getting rid of useless... Ow!

No, no, no. This is something I want.

This means something to me.

- This means something...

- She's lost her mind.

No, no, no!

No, no, no!

No, no, no!

It's my stuff and Mom's stuff.

This is my house. It's my house.

You go! You go! You go!

- You leave! You leave! You leave!

- Okay. Let's go.

- Go. Go. Go on. You go.

- Come on.

- Leave.

- We'll try this again another time, okay?

I'm disappointed in you, Doris.

You're....

- You're disappointed in me?

- Mm-hm.

You're disappointed in me?

Todd, where were you?

Where were you all those years?

All those years, I took care of her.

I fed her, I clothed her.

I took care of her. Where were you?

Where were you?

We made an agreement, Doris. Huh?

You were in the best position

to take care of her.

And how else would I have gone to

school, start my own business? How?

You agreed to that.

We agreed to that.

I could have had those things.

I could have had them too.

I could have....

- Oh, please.

- Cynthia, just....

Give me a minute.

Give me a minute with her.

Please, give me a minute with her.

You have to get away from here, Doris.

You're turning into her.

You're holding on to stuff because

you're telling yourself you might need it.

Someday, you might.

I don't know,

maybe you're just scared.

You're lonely.

I don't know why.

But I know

that you gotta get out of here.

- Can we not do this at work?

- We're doing this right now.

I don't care if you're at work or not.

Looks like

there's trouble in paradise.

Stop lying. I see it on your face.

A**hole!

I never liked her.

Cute shoes though.

You're probably wondering

what happened between me and John.

No. No. I didn't... You know,

if you wanna talk about it, I'm here.

Yeah, well, it's over between us.

It's donzo.

- Really?

- Yeah.

- Why?

- Because he's a f***ing liar.

I'm so stupid. He told me I was the only

woman he was dating, but he's lying.

- It's obvious.

- Who's he seeing?

Some girl, Lilith Primrose.

She has a master's degree.

- Do you know her?

- No.

Well, she posted some weird love sh*t

on his Facebook wall...

...so I confronted him about it.

They're having sex.

- No. No, no, no.

- Yeah. I asked him, "Who is this chick?"

He's like, "I have no idea."

But I can tell he's lying.

It was all over his face.

I've been hurt in the past, so....

Once bitten, twice shy, you know?

- Twice shy, I know.

- So anyway, it's done.

But I'm really glad I met you.

You're so cool, Doris.

Doris, listen, it's John.

Are you around today?

It's just so weird, Doris.

She kept asking me

who Lilith Primrose was.

And I was like, "I have no idea."

But she never believed me.

I was cleaning out my closet last night.

I found a pair of Brooklyn's jeans.

- Yes.

- I was so depressed, I put them on.

I'm wearing them right now.

- They fit me perfectly.

- Yes, yes, they do.

Anyway...

...it's over now.

Oh, John, I'm so sorry. I wish

there was something I could do to help.

No, you are helping, Doris. I just....

I just wanna be surrounded

by friends right now.

Okay, good. Good.

Hey, what are you doing

for Thanksgiving?

Nothing, really. Just...

Yeah, I'm having an orphan

Thanksgiving over at my place.

I'm gonna invite everybody

I've met since I moved out here.

Plus my friend Sasha's in town

from L.A...

...and she's gonna sage the apartment.

I don't know, hit a gong and stuff.

Get rid of some of that

bad breakup karma.

- She's a healer.

- Oh.

Will you come?

- Sure. Sure. I'll come. Yes.

- Great.

- Hey, Doris, can I ask you something?

- Sure.

Would you ever consider

dating a younger man?

Just curious.

Yes.

Cool.

Come on.

Oh, my God, Doris, it's on.

It's, like, so on.

Really, really, really, you think it is?

Doris, I don't think, I know.

This is it. It's your moment.

I'm so happy for you.

Doris, Thanksgiving is our special time.

It's like... It's a tradition, Doris.

I can't believe you're doing this.

I'm making two kinds of stuffing.

Roz, this is my big opportunity.

It's my chance to be with John.

Can you be honest with yourself?

- He's barely old enough to vote.

- He probably votes more than you do.

I am a conscientious objector.

That's different.

Oh, Roz, honestly, I just don't think

this is this big a deal.

You are not like them.

Don't you get that?

Why are you doing this?

You were so supportive before.

I'm having a rare moment of clarity.

You're jealous because I'm having fun

with other people and not just you.

You wish!

Roz.

Roz, there has got to be more to life

than going to lectures at the YWCA...

...and stealing cheese.

I mean, your husband died.

He died, it was tragic.

But that was 15 years ago!

Move the f*** on!

You're telling me to move on?

You have packets of duck sauce

in your refrigerator from the 1970s.

- It keeps.

- Oh, honey. Darling, don't you see?

You're just a weird little old lady

in the funny clothes to them!

You're like their weird

f***ing art project!

- You take that back.

- Doris, I'm worried about you.

You are not my mother.

My mother is dead.

So you can stop worrying about me.

I can take care of myself!

I don't steal cheese.

That cheese is free.

What action could you take today...

...that will help you achieve the success

in life that you desire?

If everything you do works,

then you're not trying hard enough.

Let there be light.

Say it with me.

Let there be light.

You're possible, Doris.

You are possible.

Hey, hey.

Whoo!

Whoo!

- Hey, Doris, you made it.

- Yes.

- You look gorgeous.

- Thank you.

- Oh, I made a pie.

- Nice.

- John?

- Yeah.

I would like to talk to you

about something.

Sure. Let me introduce you

to everybody first.

Come on up. Hey, Doris made a pie,

everyone. Doris made a pie.

- Doris.

- Yes.

Try this. It's a Thanks-tini.

My mixologist friend Oliver designed it

specifically for the party.

- Oh.

- Everybody, this is Doris.

- Of course, you know all these guys.

- Hi, Doris. You look beautiful.

- Thank you.

- This is Keith. We just met on Grindr.

- How nice.

- I know nothing about him.

And over there is my Uncle Frank.

- Frank is in sales.

- Belts and buckles, to be exact.

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