Het Diner Page #3

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How do you like that Chablis?

I think Chablis is a feeble wine, actually.

It's the kind of wine people order

when they've lost their courage.

- It's like ordering chicken.

- I couldn't agree more.

Do you mean that?

You always love it in France.

By the way, how's Beau doing?

Beau's so hip-hoppy lately.

They all are.

Beau is the adopted son

of Babette and my brother.

But Michel and their biological son Rick

never call him that.

As Minister of Public Health,

my brother was involved...

in a vaccination program

in Burkina Faso.

- Hey, Faso.

- A.k.a. Faso.

- Isn't it aka Faso?

- Loser.

Babette had gone along and they fell

in love with an orphan called Beau.

Was Beau/Faso a kind of accessory?

Like an iPhone or a Birkin bag?

Anyhow, it worked out well for Serge.

It gave him an identity. Serge Lohman,

the politician. The man of New Left.

The man who's going to vaccinate

our daughters against HPV.

Whether we want him to or not.

Yeah, Serge Lohman

with that cute African kid.

She sells shells by the seashore.

The shells she sells are surely seashells.

Whoa, even I can't say that.

All day long it's motherfucking this

and b*tches that. Awful.

Yes, but that's Michel and Rick.

That's what's so amusing.

- Rick?

- Pardon?

What are your thoughts on Syria?

- I have no thoughts on Syria.

- Of course you do.

Maybe I'm just not interested in it.

What's that Assad family like?

- It's not as nice there as here.

- Don't be silly.

What kind of family is it?

They're a powerful family.

The Prime Minister told me that

Assad is a total kleptomaniac.

Nothing is safe from that guy...

Not that much. It will lose the nose.

- I'm sorry, sir.

- We'll drink it.

Shall we leave that to Mrs Lohman?

- It's OK. How old are you? Can you vote?

- Nineteen.

Shall we agree that if you vote

for the proper party at the elections...

we'll forgive your wine-pouring ability?

This is a loo moment.

Boyz in Black:
The Unmasking?

What's 'The Unmasking'?

Why does it have to be in English?

That guy with that

much-younger woman.

Please don't stand next to me.

It's the kind of stream

that is full of its own importance.

A stream that wants to testify

to its own indestructible health.

The stream of a man

with a young wife.

Isn't it awkward sometimes for your friend

to be in a restaurant with his famous face?

- He's not my friend.

- Oh, sorry. You're sitting together, so...

- We, my daughter and I...

- What?

- Your daughter? Oh.

- Yes.

My daughter and I were wondering

whether it might be possible...

Well, my daughter and I believe

that this country needs change.

- She's studying Political Science.

- That's such a misnomer.

- Pardon?

- Political Science.

What's scientific about politics?

But continue.

Can I take a picture of her

and Mr Lohman?

Doesn't need to take long.

Private moments are precious, I know.

No problem. Mr Lohman enjoys

being in touch with his constituents.

We're having an important

discussion right now, but...

Keep your eye on me.

When I give a sign, it's picture time.

- Babette...

- Honey, wait.

Well, what a fabulously varied evening.

Hormones.

He takes Claire's seat.

Through fabric of his trousers,

he's no doubt...

feeling the warmth left behind

by my wife's ass.

This thought enrages me.

- But you're not allowed to say it.

- Really?

One moment she's hot and

throws open the windows.

The next moment she's in tears.

But isn't Babette too young

for the menopause?

Sorry, I forgot you're

a gynecologist as well.

Could you please get back

to your own chair.

From the chef.

Terrific.

- Why do you get that and we don't?

- He likes to spoil me.

Paul, listen...

Serge, it probably took that guy

hours to prepare that.

- I'm hungry.

- So why didn't we go to Burger King?

We really ought to be talking

about something else.

- Is that right?

- Your son.

- And mine.

- Yes, that's what you said on the phone.

Rick told me everything.

Everything?

Yeah, it's quite something.

- The Rickster.

- What?

That's what he calls himself.

His street name, baby.

Excuse me, your...

- This gentleman...

- This gentleman?

- Assured me...

- You better be careful.

He's a dangerous man.

- Who are you?

- Naomi.

That's a beautiful name. Right?

It means 'sweet' in Hebrew.

You're taking the picture?

Very good. OK.

Apparently lobsters do actually feel pain.

And it takes them a minute to die in

boiling water, but they don't scream.

At least, not the kind of screaming

our ears pick up.

Claire? Oh, Michel.

Where are you?

In the restaurant.

We told you, didn't we?

I'm...

I'm sorry, son.

I took your phone by mistake.

Your dad's getting old.

When Claire and I first saw the footage,

Michel was upstairs in his room.

It'd already been in the papers.

But the surveillance camera footage

changed everything.

The perpetrators now had a face.

Or rather a non-face because of the

poor image quality and the high-angle...

people now had something to grab onto.

These two boys are responsible

for a heinous act...

resulting in a dreadful outcome.

An apparent chance meeting with

a 47 year old woman from Amsterdam.

We have to warn you

that the CCTV footage is shocking...

On Saturday morning at

about 1:
00am...

two young men between

17 and 25 years of age...

approach an ATM

to withdraw some cash...

Nice boys.

The kinds of boys we all know,

like our nephew...

like our son.

I know the exact moment

in that footage...

when I recognized my son.

Maybe it was his silhouette,

the way he moved...

Something about parents...

enables them to pick out their own

children from a crowd of thousands.

The worst was the end.

There was just a flash.

I held my breath.

Or rather, I took a breath

to be the first to say something.

I didn't yet know what words to use...

but I did know that they would

change our life forever.

Want some more wine?

No, thanks.

She didn't recognize Michel,

thank God. It surprised me.

She probably couldn't connect

the images to her beloved son.

I looked at it

with a little more distance.

After years of being unemployed,

I finally had a job again.

The job of holding onto our happiness.

From:
Michel, to: Dad

Subject:
LADY BUM

I heard the rattle of a bike.

A sound you only hear in Holland.

The rider was still only a silhouette.

But even in the dark, I'd recognize

my child in a crowd of thousands.

Hi, dad.

Jesus, Michel.

Your phone.

The battery is nearly out.

- Here.

- Thanks.

- You watched?

- Yes.

- What did you see?

- The ATM.

- Sh*t.

- I agree.

- What the hell happened there?

- It was just a joke.

- A joke?

- It started out as a joke.

- It really was a joke.

- Too bad about that jerry can.

I didn't know you had a Zippo.

It's just for lighting

a girl's cigarette or a joint.

- Of course.

- It's a missed opportunity.

Gosh no, you wouldn't want to miss

an opportunity. Imagine that!

- You always act weird when you're angry.

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