Horrible Bosses Page #5

Synopsis: Nick hates his boss, mostly because he's expected to work from before sunrise to after sunset and his boss, Mr. Harken, calls him out for being a minute late and blackmails him so he can't quit. Dale hates his boss, Dr. Julia Harris, because she makes unwelcome sexual advances when he's about to get married. But Dale is on that pesky list of child offenders so he can't quit. Kurt actually likes his job and his boss, well, up until his boss dies and the boss's coked-out, psychopathic son takes over. But who would be crazy enough to quit their jobs in such poor economic times? Instead Nick, Dale and Kurt drunkenly and hypothetically discuss how to kill their bosses, and before they know it, they've hired a murder consultant to help them pull off the three deeds.
Genre: Comedy, Crime
Director(s): Seth Gordon
Production: Warner Bros. Pictures
  3 wins & 11 nominations.
 
IMDB:
6.9
Metacritic:
57
Rotten Tomatoes:
69%
R
Year:
2011
98 min
$116,900,000
Website
2,256 Views


about cost-cutting measures?

KURT:

Well, I know you don't want to cut

STAFF --

JACK:

No way. These people have worked

their asses off for me. There's

no reason they should suffer.

Kurt looks at his boss with admiration. There's a lot of

love between these two.

KURT:

There's also the issue of our

hazardous waste disposal. We're

paying a lot right now and the

Bolivians have come back with a

very good offer.

JACK:

You know why it's good? Because

they'll dump our chemicals in

rivers, pollute water supplies and

hurt people. I've spent my life

building this company.

(MORE)

(CONTINUED)

15.

24 CONTINUED:
(3) 24

JACK (CONT'D)

Would you want the Pellit name to

be associated with something like

that?

KURT:

No, I wouldn't.

As they pass the unisex rest room, they see MARGIE, 30s

and clearly pregnant, looking uncomfortable as she waits

to get in.

JACK:

Everything okay, Margie?

MARGIE:

Oh hi, Mr. Pellit. Kurt. I've

just been waiting to get in there

for a while now...

JACK:

Who's in there?

MARGIE:

It's... your son.

JACK:

(SIGHS)

Of course it is.

(then, knocking on

THE DOOR)

Bobby? There's someone waiting.

You almost done in there?

After a long beat, the door opens and out steps BOBBY

PELLIT, late-20s, weasely-looking, sniffing a bit too

much and rubbing his nose repeatedly. There's something

unnaturally energetic about him.

PELLIT:

What the f***?! A guy can't get

any privacy in this place!

JACK:

It's all yours, Margie.

Margie quickly slips into the rest room and shuts the

door.

JACK:

You know, Bobby, you seem to be

spending more time in that

bathroom than at your desk these

days.

(CONTINUED)

16.

24 CONTINUED:
(4) 24

PELLIT:

Well, then, you're f***ing stupid,

Dad. Because that's clearly not

true.

JACK:

All I ask is that you do your part

around here, son.

PELLIT:

I do my part. I do other people's

parts. But you just like to ride

my ass because I'm your son. I

don't see you screaming at --

(RE:
KURT)

-- dickskin here.

JACK:

(PATIENTLY)

That's because Kurt does his work

and does it well. You could take

a lesson from him.

PELLIT:

(SNORTS)

The only thing I'd take a lesson

from him on is being gay. And I

wouldn't take that lesson because

I don't want to be gay.

JACK:

(HEADING OFF)

Come on, Kurt.

Kurt follows after Jack.

PELLIT:

Yeah, that's what I thought.

Jack and Kurt pass a receptionist desk and go out into --

25 EXT. PELLIT CHEMICAL CO. PARKING LOT - CONTINUOUS ACTION 25

Kurt walks Jack to his Cadillac.

JACK:

Tell me something, Kurt. Are you

happy here?

KURT:

You kidding? It's the best job in

the world.

(CONTINUED)

17.

25 CONTINUED:
25

JACK:

I'm glad to hear you say that.

I'm rewriting my will tonight and

there's going to be a special

place for you in there.

He gives Kurt a hug like a doting father, then climbs

into his car. As Jack pulls out and begins driving

across the parking lot, Kurt waves. Suddenly, the car's

HORN begins to honk in a CONSTANT BLARE. Kurt lowers his

hand as the car veers off the pavement, slowly cruising

into a tree where it stops abruptly, the horn still

honking.

A bewildered Kurt runs toward the car, as we --

CUT TO:

26 INT. BRADFORD'S BAR - THAT NIGHT 26

Kurt sits at a table looking depressed.

KURT:

He died instantly. They say his

heart burst in his chest like a

water balloon.

PAN to reveal Kurt is sitting with Dale, who looks just

as dejected.

DALE:

Wow. Sorry, man. He was like a

dad to you.

KURT:

I loved him. And I loved working

for him. And now his idiot son is

gonna be in charge. You know how

Rate this script:3.3 / 3 votes

Michael Markowitz

Michael Markowitz (born August 15, 1961) is a writer, producer, and actor who began his comedy career in The Mee-Ow Show, an improv group at Northwestern University. Some projects he has worked on include Duckman, Becker, and the films Horrible Bosses, Horrible Bosses 2 and Boob Job. He has collaborated several times in the past with Jason Alexander. As an actor, he appeared in the films The Flamingo Kid and Last Resort, and the TV shows Becker and World Cup Comedy. more…

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Submitted on July 16, 2016

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