How to Be Single Page #11

I have the whole floor.

I have literally paid the bill,

every time we've gone out.

But that's how you

stay super rich.

God!

You have so much

to learn from me, still.

I want you to be

my sugar-daddy.

I'll be your sugar-sister.

I thought you

didn't do breakfast?

(SHUSHING) You're ruining it.

(MUFFLED GIGGLES)

ALICE:
I've been thinking that

the time we have to be single,

is really the time we have

to get good at being alone.

(POP MUSIC PLAYING)

But, how good at being alone

do we really want to be?

Isn't there a danger

that you'll get so good

at being single,

so set in your ways

that you'll miss out on the

chance to be with somebody great?

Hello, hello, hello, hello.

Some people take baby steps

to settle down.

(FAUCET HISSING)

Some people refuse

to settle at all.

(ALL CHEERING)

Sometimes,

it's not statistics.

It's just chemistry.

(INAUDIBLE)

And sometimes,

just because it is over,

doesn't mean the love ends.

Um, I want to talk

to you about your mom.

She got sick when

you were really little

and I don't talk about her

because I still miss her.

Every day.

But, we need to talk about her.

Who's that?

Me.

Who's that?

Mommy.

Yeah.

A lot of good memories in here.

I want to show you something.

(PHOEBE GIGGLING ON TV)

But if you

feel like I feel

Please let me know

that it's real

(PHOEBE GURGLING ON TV)

You're just

too good to be true

Can't take my

eyes off of you

The Eyes of You song.

(PHOEBE'S MOM VOCALIZING)

The Eyes of You song.

(CHUCKLES)

(VOCALIZING CONTINUES)

I love you, baby

(DAVID SINGING ALONG) And

if it's quite all right

I need you, baby

To warm the lonely nights

I love you, baby

Trust in me when I say

Oh, pretty baby

Don't bring me down I pray

(HUMMING)

Oh, pretty baby

(SNIFFLES)

PHOEBE:
Now I know

why you never sing.

Why?

Because your voice is so bad.

(LAUGHS)

What are you talking about?

That was excellent.

ALICE:
The thing about being

single is, you should cherish it.

Because, in a week, (PANTS)

or a lifetime, of being alone,

you may only get one moment.

One moment,

when you're not tied up

in a relationship with anyone.

A parent, a pet,

a sibling, a friend.

(PANTING)

One moment, when you

stand on your own.

Really, truly single.

(LAUGHS)

And then,

it's gone.

(POP MUSIC PLAYING)

Rate this script:5.0 / 3 votes