How to Build a Better Boy Page #6

Forget Albert Banks

ever existed,

'cause you're never

going to see him again.

Jenks.

Have we planted a story

to cover up

our attendance

at the football game?

I took the liberty

of blaming

the whole thing

on Colonel Dalton.

I believe you two had a rivalry

at West Point?

Well done, Major.

All's fair in love and war.

I wouldn't know, sir.

I've never seen action in either.

General, are you in contact

with Albert?

I'd like to see

how he's functioning.

That's above

your clearance level, doctor.

For the time being,

I suggest you keep an eye

on your daughter.

Well, that's it.

It's over.

No. Albert will come to his senses,

and he'll remember me,

and that

he's not some soldier.

And when he does,

I'm going to be there for him.

I'm going

to homecoming.

Did you hear a word

they just said?

Look around.

Operation Boyfriend has been shut down.

I'm not blind.

I can see that

Albert is

wire and metals

and microchips.

But it's so much more

than that,

and it was like that

from the first spark.

It was magic.

Mae, the world runs

on physics.

There's an equation

for everything,

and you and I

understand them all.

Magic is for people

who don't.

Look, I'm sorry

that you don't see it.

But I'm not giving up

on Albert.

This was supposed to be

the perfect night.

I know I'm biased.

But a girl as brilliant

and beautiful as you,

you're gonna

have that night.

I promise.

Thanks, Dad.

Um, hey.

Hey.

Jaden, come on.

I'm sorry I'm late.

Worried?

I never had a doubt.

Get out of the way,

doctor.

I thought

Albert was 5,000 miles away.

We knew his mission

would lead him here.

But we couldn't let Mae know,

she would have warned him.

We're taking Albert now.

Where is my air support?

General,

I can't let you do this.

Check the chain of command,

doctor.

You work for me.

If you try

to take Albert by force,

he'll fight you

with everything he's got.

And I'm not gonna

let you march in there

and start "World War Albert"

with my daughter in the middle.

The prototype

will come with us peacefully,

if you let him

finish his mission.

You mean kissing your daughter

during a magical moonlit dance?

Yeah, it's what she wants.

I don't give two shakes of a blind

donkey's tail what Mae wants!

Well, I do.

If you ruin her night,

I quit!

And you can forget

about another X-17,

or the X-18

or even the X-36.

What in the world

is the X-36?

I have no idea.

But it is going to be twice

as good as the X-18, obviously.

I don't leave

anything to chance.

Mae wants a kiss?

Yeah.

Then stand back, doctor.

Because U.S. Army is going

to make sure it happens.

Listen up, soldiers.

We've got a new mission.

We'll call it...

Operation Pucker Up...

Sir.

That was supposed to be us.

So what?

They make a good couple.

Don't worry, I'm gonna restore

order to the kingdom.

What are you talking about?

Never mind.

Let's just stand here

and look popular.

Good.

Now stare into my eyes.

Are people noticing?

Keep looking.

I hope

you're proud of yourself.

Hey, Gabby, you look great.

You just had to show up,

didn't you?

With your perfect hair

and your yummy eyes.

You just had to be a vision

of grace and charm.

And that's bad?

You and Mae cannot end up together.

It's impossible.

Gabby, you can't know what's

possible unless you know everything.

And nobody does,

not even you.

Oh, you look so beautiful.

Your hotness

is scalding my eyes.

Thanks.

What are you guys wearing?

Polka dots, your favorite.

Don't we look A-Mae-Zing?

We're calling ourselves

The Mae Flowers.

Operation Pucker Up

is go, go, go.

Yes, sir.

I want this kiss happening

by 2100 hours.

You can't hurry love,

general.

I can and I will.

Where is my Covert

Romance Team? Jenks?

I'm all over it, general.

Yo, let's go dance.

I can't.

I'm preparing

to accept my crown.

And tell

all of my grateful subjects

what I know about Albert.

Albert's cool.

Why don't you just leave it alone?

Why don't you stop letting

yourself get pushed around?

You know what?

I will.

I hope

we can still be friends.

Did you just

break up with me?

Yeah, I did.

Madam and monsieur,

and welcome to Paris.

Make sure to stop

at the crepe and fromage table

for a free ballroom dance lesson

from moi.

But now,

it's time to crown

our guest of honor.

Ladies and gentlemen,

your Homecoming Queen is...

Mae Hartley!

Mae won?

Mae won Homecoming Queen.

My little girl.

We stuffed the ballot box.

Where are you two going?

Get back in there,

now, now.

Well, I'm not really sure

what to sa...

I don't even know

what's going on here.

This is not acceptable.

Yes, it is.

This is like...

an unexpected triumph

for a genuinely decent person.

Not some hollow gesture

that you always took

for granted.

Well said.

No, no, no, no.

You guys are all confused.

You need to know the truth

about Mae's boyfriend.

Mister Big Man On Campus.

You see,

Albert here is a machine!

Yeah, bro,

You're a machine!

No, no, no, no, no.

You guys don't understand.

Albert is dangerous.

Dangerous!

I'm trying to warn you.

Albert is a super-soldier

who can tear this place apart

with one move.

So if he gets

near one of you,

every single one of you

better get down.

Get down!

Hey, you want to go out there

and dance or something?

No, I'm okay.

Yo, J-bones,

what's up?

Um, how...

how are you holding up?

You know, since you're not

gonna be first boyfriend...

Oh, dude, I'm not worried

about any of that.

And Nevaeh and I, done.

Really?

Perfect couple.

Everyone, like,

expected us to be together.

But from now on

I'm gonna stop worrying

about what other people

think.

Albert's got it

all figured out.

He saw

how special Mae was,

and he asked her

to the dance.

I wanted to ask her

to the dance...

I just really didn't have

the guts.

Anyway,

see you around, Brad.

That's not my name.

I can't believe it.

I was totally wrong...

and Albert was right.

I'm sorry.

Did your mouth just make

the words "I Was Wrong"?

Jaden liked Mae.

He liked her

the whole time.

Hey.

Congratulations.

Thanks.

I guess.

I have to tell you

something.

I just want to apologize.

We've been friends

since forever.

And it's always

just been the two of us.

And that was

enough for me.

But it wasn't fair to you.

I was holding you back.

I never should have said that

Jaden was out of your league.

You were just worried

that I would get hurt.

No.

I was worried about

losing my best friend.

Maybe my only friend.

We were a good team.

Unstoppable.

But you're great

on your own.

Gabby...

No, Mae, it's okay.

You know that all of this

isn't really my thing.

But if that's what

makes you happy,

then that's what

I want for you...

whether I'm a part of it

or not.

Ladies and gentlemen,

it's time

for the moonlight dance.

All right, people.

We're finally gonna be able

to retrieve this weapon,

as soon as he macks

with the girl.

I mean, kisses

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