How to Build a Better Boy Page #5

in sight.

Excuse me a second.

It's good talk.

Stay there.

Do not approach the target.

I can totally

take this kid.

Mae, listen... I...

I know what you're gonna say, okay?

I know you're upset.

You feel like Albert has come between us,

and you don't want things

to change.

Albert is not a normal boy.

I agree.

No, I need to tell you

what's really going on.

Albert is a robot.

I know. Okay, he can be

a little bit formal,

but I think that's cute.

And you don't even understand boys,

you think

they're a distraction,

and that's fine.

But I love Albert.

And I know that he feels

the same way about me.

Albert can't feel anything for you.

It's impossible.

You know, I should probably go,

Albert's looking for me.

Mae, just trust me.

You have to end things with

Albert and it's really simple.

All you have to do is take him by the

hands, look him right in his eyes

and say

"Initiate self-destruct."

Okay, that is ridiculous

and I'm not gonna do that.

You have to.

I need a best friend,

not a boss.

Well, you know what?

Right now, neither one is a very fun job.

Well, then maybe

you should quit.

Sigma 3 to leader.

False alarm, guys.

The prototype isn't here.

Ready, Ready.

Go.

Go Eagles!

Do it for your future

homecoming queen.

It's the fourth quarter,

and our fighting Eagles

are trailing

Uni High, 28 to 3.

As far as I recall,

this is the closest

we've ever come to winning.

I guess you found him.

He can sense us coming.

How can we even get close?

We need

the electro-pulse device.

It will shut down

any electrical current

within a targeted range,

including Mr. Cutie Patootie.

And that's when

we'll grab him.

You all right, man?

Did you tell Mae

about Albert?

We didn't get around

to it.

My sister is dating

a lethal robotic soldier,

and you didn't get around to it?

It just didn't come up?

It's my knee, coach.

Get some ice on it.

Where's my second-string

running back?

You got to be

kidding me.

Eagles.

Alaska!

Suit up!

What? No, we can't use him.

Yeah?

Tell that to the scoreboard,

kid.

Oh, no.

This cannot be happening.

Yeah, I'm sure

it will be fine.

As long as nobody tries

to tackle him.

Okay, guys, battle time.

Download me an action plan.

Just stay out of the way.

Blast right 21 Z, on two.

Albert!

Hello, Gabby.

You cannot go into this game.

Yeah, she's right.

You haven't even been to the practices,

you don't know

the plays.

Yeah, yeah.

Gabby, what are you doing?

Hello, Mae.

Uh-oh. Bestie versus boyfriend.

Grab your popcorn, dudes.

He should

not be playing football.

He could think someone's

the enemy and take them out.

It's all in good fun.

Hey, get your boyfriend

out of my homecoming game.

Hello, Nevaeh.

That's heaven spelled

backwards, guys.

Penalty.

Delay of game.

Mae...

Don't even talk to me.

Hey, I'm just trying

to help you guys out.

You don't even know.

All right, guys.

We're gonna win this game! Yeah!

We're at the top,

we're at the top

Won't take second best

We're at the top,

we're at the top

All the rest

We'll never stop

No one's gonna stand

in our way

Somebody tried

but not today

We're at the top,

we're at the top,

Won't take second best

We're at the top,

we're at the top

In all the rest

We'll never stop

We're at the top,

we're at the top

Won't take second best

We're at the top,

we're at the top

All the rest

We'll never stop

Jenks, get in the game.

These are the men

that we believe

broke into the residence.

It's imperative

that we find them.

Awful lot of fuss

for a burglary.

What's this about,

General?

That's classified.

Whoo.

Oh, um, sorry, Sheriff.

But the Eagles just scored

another touchdown.

What?

Another?

But they never beat

Uni High.

I've got video.

They got this new kid,

he's a bona-fide beast.

Look, what did I tell you?

This kid can do

some serious damage.

It's the X-17's

empowered assault mode.

We've found

the prototype.

And he's dating my daughter.

All right,

come on, Eagles.

Not going to let Uni

take it this time!

Plenty of time left!

Let's go.

We could actually win this.

All because of Albert.

He's like our secret weapon.

Let's make history, bro.

You got it, captain.

All right, coach,

time for one more play.

I've got a brilliant idea.

Let's give the ball

to this guy.

Albert! Albert!

Albert! Albert!

Albert! Albert!

This is not

an authorized cheer.

J-A-D-E-N.

Let's go, Jaden.

Break.

Set.

Hut.

Tackle him.

Go, go, go, go, go, go...

He can do that?

Albert!

Albert!

Oh, no,

we're in trouble.

This way.

What is happening?

Gabby, what is this?

Oh, so now you want

to finally start listening.

Your dad does not work

for a video game company.

He works for the Pentagon.

And Albert is a weapon,

a covert robotic soldier.

And all of this

is a search party

for your boyfriend.

Everyone's after him,

your dad, the army,

these mean guys with like,

big angry eyebrows,

and it's all our fault!

Hurry up!

Stay quick, stay sharp.

Come on.

Sigma 3, respond.

Do you have the prototype?

Sigma 2, respond.

Negative.

I don't have a visual.

Boss, where are you?

Boss, boss,

he's just gone.

Wait a minute,

where you guys are?

Hey, let me see your hands.

Don't move.

Hide.

McFee:

You've stolen property

of the United States

government.

Come out peacefully

and tell us everything

we want to know.

That's right.

And there is

no way

that you are going

to homecoming.

But, Dad.

Where is Albert?

What have you done with him?

Sit down,

Missy.

Well, you had an eventful

two days.

You hacked

a government network

and stole a weapon

so secret,

Congress doesn't even know

it exists.

You hijacked

the prize creation

from the most advanced lab

on earth.

That reminds me,

do you guys have any internships?

Silence.

Your actions

were careless

and your methods

were deplorable.

But it's clear your intentions

were purely romantic.

You didn't want

a high-tech war machine.

Just a boy toy.

Take them home, doctor,

they're free to go.

Did you just say

free to go?

Albert...

The X-17 is no longer

your concern. Jenks?

Albert's system was temporarily

shut down last night

by an electro-pulse device.

Thankfully, the criminals

who did it are in custody.

When he rebooted,

he returned to his default mission,

saving the free world

from danger.

We're tracking them

all over the globe.

So far today,

he's helped freedom fighters

in South America,

built a school

in the Middle East.

And right now

he's leading a team

of mine-sniffing dolphins

through the straits of Hormuz.

Albert would never

leave me.

This is all a mistake.

The mistake

was that you laid

your eyes upon him

in the first place.

He's the property

of the U.S. Army now,

where he belongs.

No, you're wrong.

Young lady, you'll do

as the general says.

On one condition.

In exchange

for your freedom,

you will never speak a word

about any of this.

Go back to your lives

just like they were.

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