How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days Page #6

"Scintillation... "

that's not bad.

Aw, that sucks.

Guys, let's take a break.

Huh? A little coffee

and nine-ball.

Shake it out.

Maybe I'll be able

to concentrate

since the woman

is driving me crazy.

Which woman... Andie,

or Princess Sophia?

- Ah!

- Uh-huh.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah!

Wait a second.

I thought you said

after the Knicks game

that she was a goddess.

Oh, she was. That was

the good Andie, guys.

This amazing, fun,

cool, sexy woman.

I'm talking

about the evil Andie, now.

It's like a...

it's like a crack-enhanced

Kathie Lee Gifford.

She... she's

probably bipolar.

Well, her South Pole's

definitely prevailing.

Well, all you gotta do

is rock it for five more days.

Muffin!

Which shouldn't be

too difficult.

- Hi!

- Andie!

- My little muffin.

- Hey, sweetie.

We were just talking about you.

- Hi.

- Hello, there.

How are you?

You look gorgeous.

Oh, thank you.

Andie, this is Tony,

and this is Thayer.

- Oh, yes.

- Hey.

Benny Wenny's told me

so much about you two.

Oh, well, Benny Wenny's said

wonderful things about you, too.

Oh...

Oh, they don't look

so simple-minded.

Honey,

Hmm?

Look what

I got for us. Oh.

Look at that.

Oh, wow!

- Ooh!

- Look at him go. What is it?

Jumper.

It's a Chinese Crested,

of course.

No kidding.

- A Chinese Crested.

- Mm.

So, it-it's like a dog, right?

Oh, hey.

There he is.

Ooh, Ben. Ben.

You got a dog.

You're hurting Krull's feelings.

Krull, is it?

Krull. Krull, the Warrior King.

Well, sure, 'cause

that's clearly what... Yeah.

Oh, oh, oh.

Oh, wait, there's more.

What do you got there?

Oh, nice.

- For me?

- Mm-hmm.

- Get out of town.

- Try it on.

That's like the...

inside of a raincoat.

- Medium. Oh, yeah.

- It matches! Try it on.

Now, that is going to fit

nicely, sweetie, thank you.

No, Ben, put it on.

No, you should try

it on. Otherwise,

you don't know if it's

going to fit or...

Oh, go for it.

That has never hurt anybody.

Huh? Huh?

I was just gonna save it

for a better occasion,

all right?

Check that out.

Oh, yeah, that's nice.

- Hey.

- Hmm?

You're a vision in khaki.

It's going to be

a happy little family,

Just the three of us.

We are, aren't we?

Wow.

He's our boy, Ben.

Oh, see, that's sweet.

Mm-hmm, hey, mm-hmm.

Whoa, ho, ho, ho,

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.

Andie, hey, it's good

to see you, too, sweetie.

Ah, I got you.

Gotcha, gotcha, gotcha.

Gotcha, gotcha,

gotcha, gotcha.

Oh...

He's just

not potty-trained yet.

- Whoa!

- Oh!

Okay, well, he's a pisser.

Come here, little tinkle king.

No, no, no.

Come here, tinkle king.

- He is a tinkle king.

- Oh, yeah.

Who's my little tinkler?

You tinkle tinkles.

Well, congratulations,

little plaid family.

We, you know,

we got a whole bunch

of work we got to do,

but we're...

we're still on for poker

at your house this weekend?

- Oh, you count on it.

- Whoo! Boys' night.

- Yeah.

- Whoo!

Yeah, it was nice meeting you,

Nice to meet you.

And, of course, Krull.

- Bye. Say bye, Krullie.

- All right.

A little soap and water

will take that out.

He goes, "Woof, woof. "

Yeah, thank you, buds.

Oh, come here. Ooh.

Do you love him?

Oh, I do.

Oh, look at Krull's necklace.

He's got more ice than

Liberace, don't you?

Oh, it's just a little frosting.

Frosting?

Frosting.

We were thinking bold,

new, fresh.

"Frost yourself. "

Excuse me?

"Frost yourself... "

The slogan for the campaign.

You frost a cake.

We're in the middle

of a meeting, Benjamin.

I'm talking about diamonds.

They're frosting.

As in, "Whoa, would you

check out her frosting?"

- Frost yourself.

- Frost yourself.

How did you come up with it?

I got it off the woman

who is falling

madly in love with me.

Oh...

It may have possibilities,

but as far as the woman who's

falling madly in love with you,

I will decide that at the party.

If he can get her there.

Now, just think about it...

ladies, frost yourself.

Frost yourself.

Mm-hmm. We could introduce it

at the party.

It-It should be the theme.

Yes.

Everything frosted.

- All of it.

- Martini glasses.

Chandeliers.

Ah, jewels everywhere.

The women.

The whole party...

a sparkling diamond.

All of it frosted.

Women of New York!

Frost yourselves!

Hey, frost this!

Well, I like it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah,

yeah, yeah, I hear you.

You have 17 new messages.

Message one. Received at 5:44.

Oh. Sit down. Sit.

Hi, sweetie pea. It's me.

Where are you?

I'm not home.

Received at 5:
47.

Benny, it's Andie.

Guess you're not home.

Three. Received at 5:48.

Benny Bear, are you not

answering your phone?

Yeah, I am.

Four. Received at 5:49.

Hey, buddy.

Game three tonight. Blondie's.

Don't be late

or I will kill you.

Who is it?!

It's me.

Five. Received at 5:52.

It's me.

Ah!

Ow!

Ow!

What a surprise.

Tried to get ahold of you.

Yeah?

I did something kind of wacky.

Eh?

Yes. I used Photoshop

at work today

to composite our faces together

to see what our kids

would look like.

Our... Family... Album!

You don't want

to see our children?

We don't have...

children.

I hate you.

You know what?

I'm sorry. No, no, no.

I didn't mean it

like that, all right?

I... Show me, show me,

show me, show me.

Please show me.

We don't have children!

Oh, I thought you meant...

Krull.

I just want to...

Will you show them to me?

You don't want to see them.

I do. Please, please

show them to me.

I really do

want to see them.

Really?

Yeah.

Okay.

Oh, that's our wedding.

And this is our first child...

Benny, Jr.

Yeah.

Oh, there's us

vacationing in Hawaii.

Little Andie's

on my shoulders

and dum-da-da-dah,

Benjamin, Jr. On yours.

Yeah, yeah,

yeah, yeah, yeah.

There's little Andie.

Oh, there are the kids

in Switzerland,

yodel-odel-ing.

Our kids are really...

attractive.

Yeah!

Ah, hey, Mom.

Ah, yeah, I'm-I'm doing fine.

Yeah. Yeah, yeah, she is.

Just a second.

It's for you.

Oh, great.

Hey, Glenda.

Why is my mom

calling you?

Shh.

I just showed him.

Yeah, well, he

thinks our children

will be very attractive.

Oh, no.

All right,

you go back to cooking.

Call me later.

Tomorrow. Yeah, great.

Okay, Glenda.

Love you, too. Bye.

Thanks, honey.

Yeah.

So you and my mom,

you talk, huh?

Yeah, I called

her to get some

baby pictures of

you for our book.

Hey, you never told me...

that you wore diapers

till you were five.

You know what, honey,

I got to go to the...

Uh-oh.

Ah, no,

come on, man.

You think maybe he thinks

the felt is grass?

Oh...

Oh, man.

Oh!

Ah... Ah... No, no,

No, man! Come on!

Hey, Benny Bear?

Hey!

Do you have plans tonight?

Tonight?

I have another surprise for you.

Ah... you know what?

Not a good night for me.

I- I, I gotta work.

- Of all things.

- Oh, no.

Yeah, yeah, I know.

We got a Knicks game on.

I had a broccoli-

and-asparagus casserole

planned for you and me,

right there in front of the TV,

and we're not going to be able

to do that either,

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