iGirlfriend Page #5

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She's not a doctor.

Give me my laptop.

Updating.

Updating.

Updating.

Updating.

I don't need it anyway.

Updating.

Updating.

Bash, what have you done?

Updating.

You're so much hotter in person.

This is why she's

been acting so crazy.

Her strength, her emotion,

her sex drive, seriously?

These are all way too high.

Updating.

Updating.

Oh sh*t, you changed

her relationship status?

It's just one more thing you're

going to lose to me, Vag.

Bash, you don't understand.

If she's in a

relationship with you...

Oh, you are intense, baby.

Don't use that word.

I'm so sorry, baby.

I was just kidding.

I didn't mean it.

Simon, this b*tch is crazy.

I just want to talk.

Where are you going?

What are you doing?

[music playing]

[crashing]

Oh sh*t.

Well, I did not see this

evening taking this turn.

What do we do?

Do we call 9-1-1?

No.

Hell no.

We're not going to do that.

We're going to do what

teenagers always do

in a situation like this, run.

[screaming]

[music playing]

That's my house.

So, what happened back there?

Who is that lady?

Honestly, it's a

long, long story.

Tell me later?

OK guys, so the next

project that we're

going to be working on this

year, it's called Stan's Face.

Yes, yes, I know you guys

are all very excited.

The basic premises, I

wake up every morning

and take a new

picture of my face.

Dude, that chick was so hot.

You and Simon with

college chicks?

Epic, bro.

Dude, are you kidding me?

That's called evidence, son.

Hey.

How's your shoulder, baby?

You know how I feel about

that word, sweet heart.

[music playing]

How you doing Simon?

College girl?

Nice bro.

Genius, right?

Simon, what are you doing here?

Better question is, what

are you doing in my seat?

Don't look at me.

Get out of the man's seat.

Oh.

Celia, care to do that honors?

Since Stanley has stepped

down as intern president,

I would like to nominate

Simon for president of FMSDA.

Who will second?

Great.

Let's get started.

I've been working on this

really awesome program.

Scene 70, take one, marker.

All right, you ready?

Ready over there, Tony?

All right.

And action.

I forgot my line.

Oh sh*t, we're doing a line?

Sorry.

Cut.

I'm sorry.

Greetings, blah, blah, blah.

Sorry.

You're gross.

[laughter]

OK guys...

[laughter]

Full disclosure, think

about... blah, blah, blah.

OK, what I just said was a lie.

But that's not... Sh*t.

OK.

OK, the thing I

just said was a lie.

About Bash not... sh*t.

OK.

About me not caring

what Bash does to me.

All right, I got it.

Blah, blah, blah.

You can bet your ass I'm

going to tell everybody

that they did.

Because she has to

remove it, right?

No.

No?

No she does not

have to [inaudible]..

Oh, so it doesn't matter...

We're not making a pornography.

Contrary to popular belief.

We're going to get real weird

with this one, all right?

Wait until I get off

on the idea that she's

going to be the first one...

I totally get off on the idea

of the first girl... oh my God.

I totally get off on

the idea of... oh my God.

Oh my God.

Oh man I almost had it.

Sh*t.

Why is this line so hard?

[inaudible]

What are we doing right now?

Scene A71, Frank, take one.

I just lost my thing-inity.

Whatever that is.

Slate.

Slate-inity.

[laughter]

Who's my little buddy?

You know what we're going to do?

You're going to

type the buttons,

you're going to make it happen...

[laughter]

It is your will.

It is God's work

that you do this.

It is your fate.

Do you see?

The computer tells you.

It is if it is speaking to us.

(SINGING)

OK.

[screaming]

I was actually going

to say I was thinking

about a different direction.

I was thinking about that.

After he leaves,

I go over there.

I start making out with Stanley.

Oh my God.

Why is everyone laughing?

That was stupid.

Why is everyone laughing?

All right, so...

No one's laughing.

Take 32, [inaudible],

take three.

[beeping]

The clacking things.

57 Charlie, take one.

That's a lot of Charlie's.

That's 57 Charlie

all over the place.

Oh f***, dude.

No.

Acting.

No, OK.

42 Dallas, take one.

It should always be dollars.

Dollars, dollars, dollars.

Dollar bills, y'all.

Everything is about Stanley.

Everything is about Stanley.

Stanley is starring

in his own movie.

[inaudible]

Oh, right, right.

[inaudible]

I got caught up being

popular and being...

it totally fell.

And...

Head to scene 68,

your anus, take one.

And action.

Wait, what are we doing?

What are we doing?

[music playing]

[music playing]

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