Irrational Man Page #7

Synopsis: A new philosophy professor arrives on a small town campus near Newport, Rhode Island. His name, Abe Lucas. His reputation : bad. Abe is said to be a womanizer and an alcoholic. But what people do not know is that he is a disillusioned idealist. Since he has become aware of his inability to change the world, he has indeed been living in a state of deep nihilism and arrogant desperation. In class, he only goes through the motions and outside he drinks too much. But as far as sex is concerned, he is just a shadow of himself now: depression is not synonymous with Viagra! For all that, he can't help being attracted to one of his students, pretty and bright Jill Pollard. He enters into a relationship with her which remains platonic, even if Jill would not say no to more. The situation remains unchanged for a while until, one day, in a diner, Abe and Jill surprise a conversation that will change the course of their lives dramatically...
Genre: Comedy, Drama
Director(s): Woody Allen
Production: Sony Pictures Classics
  2 nominations.
 
IMDB:
6.6
Metacritic:
53
Rotten Tomatoes:
46%
R
Year:
2015
95 min
Website
3,169 Views


Jean-Paul Sartre's wonderful insight,

"Hell is other people."

Abe seemed

to have had a breakthrough.

It was as if whatever had been stifling

his deepest feelings became unblocked.

Police still have no clues

in the murder of Judge Thomas Spangler,

who was poisoned in Lippitt Park weeks ago.

At a press conference,

investigators told reporters

all leads have been followed up,

but so far there are no

persons of interest.

They said that speculation

that the poison had been intended

for someone other than Judge Spangler,

was just speculation and unlikely.

You're wearing a new perfume.

I love that you notice those things.

I've become very attuned

to the sensual joys of life.

Sights and sounds,

the taste of food and wine.

What?

What are you thinking?

Today for one very funny moment,

I thought it would be ironic

if you had killed Judge Spangler.

Uh-huh, and how did I

perform that little miracle?

I don't know, I don't know.

I mean, you couldn't and you wouldn't.

- It's got to be hard to kill somebody.

- Mmm.

Especially to poison a stranger.

Yeah, I mean, if I had to

eliminate someone, I think I'd...

I don't know, use a gun or run him over.

I mean, cyanide's a whole other deal.

Was it cyanide?

The papers didn't say that.

I always assume anyone poisoned,

is poisoned by cyanide.

Oh, that's funny.

I always assume arsenic for some reason.

- Yeah?

- Yeah.

Old movies or something.

It had to be someone that knew him.

I mean, someone would have to

be close enough to him

to drop poison in his coffee.

Or I guess it was juice, wasn't it?

I enjoyed the whole conversation.

It was like sitting at a tense poker table,

holding a full house,

and chatting innocently...

Confident I had the winning hand,

but getting a thrill out of the chance

I could be beaten with a straight flush

or four of a kind.

I had a big argument with Roy today.

I don't like to hear that.

I told him that I wanted

to be honest with him.

And, that I still had

real feelings for him.

But I also have feelings for you.

I must say, you were special

from that very first day.

You are very lucky.

I am very lucky.

Mmm.

So, what do you wanna talk about?

Um...

Look, I'm not gonna see you anymore.

I can't operate under these conditions.

I'm not just gonna wait around while

you play out your affair with Abe Lucas.

Yeah, I understand.

That's not fair to you.

Yeah, I'm just gonna move on.

Whatever happens, happens.

- Are you seeing somebody else?

- No.

But, obviously, you are, so,

I'm not gonna hold on from trying.

That wouldn't be fair.

It's too bad.

We had a good thing goin'.

Hey, it's my fault, Roy.

I'm just really not ready

to commit to one person.

Yeah.

Dinner was delicious.

And this pie...

- It's so nice of you to have me over.

- Well, we're happy to.

Particularly since Jill

always speaks so highly of you.

Have you two been following

the Judge Spangler murder?

Have we? We have a special

attachment to Judge Spangler.

'Cause we overheard

some people talking about him,

and what a rotten judge he was,

and we kind of rooted for him

to have a coronary or get run over.

I've jogged in that park with Sally Kelly.

You know, when I first heard about it,

I thought someone poisoned him

at breakfast, and it kicked in

when he was in the park.

But, you know, when I read

it was cyanide in his drink,

my theory unraveled.

You know, you were right, Abe.

It was cyanide.

- Mmm-hmm.

- You said that very early on, didn't you?

That's what they said it was.

Yeah, well, like I said,

I always think cyanide.

Cyanide's the clich

because it's so quick and fatal.

Arsenic takes time and is very painful.

None of the herbicides

are quick and dispositive.

I don't know anything about poisons.

I don't, either, just what I read.

Who'd wanna kill a judge?

Only everybody,

every person he ever ruled against.

But I think they looked into

everybody that knew him.

Including that woman that we heard,

and they were all ruled out.

That's why they think

it might be a sick prank,

or intended for someone else.

But it was quick-acting poison,

so they would have to drop it in the cup

right there in the park.

- Well, that makes sense.

- Mmm-hmm.

But not an easy thing to do,

with a total stranger,

in broad daylight, in a public place.

Unless he was there with

someone he knew, and trusted.

- A friend.

- A weekend. A weekend.

A weekend early in the morning,

not a lot of people around.

Had to be someone he knew.

But I think they questioned

everyone that knew him.

- They said it was a regular orange juice?

- Mmm-hmm.

And he bought an orange juice

there every weekend

and he'd read the paper after jogging.

Well, then if it was routine,

somebody could've come around

and just dropped the poison in his cup.

- Someone...

- You know, he wouldn't be on a park bench

reading the newspaper, unless he was alone.

That rules out a friend.

How do we know it was a man?

Maybe it was a woman.

Oh, that's a good point.

Maybe he turned his back.

Someone appears out of the blue,

and drops something in his drink?

Well, aren't those take-out juices

covered with a straw?

Or someone could have gone to Pascal's

and gotten a juice,

and put the poison in it

and switched it with the judge's.

Hmm.

I'm sure the police have

run through every theory.

Okay, let's say the judge is

sitting in the park with his orange juice,

and, and along comes someone with

an exact matching cup full of poison...

- Who comes along?

- And...

- Well...

- Someone who wants to kill the judge.

Whoever it was,

would have to get the judge

to look away long enough

to make the switch.

- I mean, they'd be taking a huge risk...

- But think...

They would sit down next to the judge,

and the guy doesn't even have to know him,

he just is sitting there,

and the judge is drinking his juice,

you know,

and he sets it down next to him,

and this person is just...

The judge opens up his paper, and he turns

and he's covered up for just long enough.

Well, if he didn't know the judge,

why would he wanna go

to all that trouble to kill him?

Yeah, he'd have to be familiar with

the judge's routine, the details.

But that would be easy.

You could just stalk the judge

for a week and you would...

I mean, it sounds like

this was his Saturday morning ritual.

I like it.

What Jill says makes sense.

It's a well-thought out concept.

The judge reads the paper,

blocks his eye line, a quick switch.

You know, if someone

sits next to you on a bench,

you often turn away.

I'm sure the police

are way ahead of us on all this.

Mmm.

The murder of Spangler

remained a hot tabloid issue.

Abe often talked about it

and what a blessing it was for that woman,

now that the judge was gone.

I didn't give any special thought to it,

until one day,

when I ran into Ellie Tanner, a friend,

that I sometimes went

horseback riding with.

No, no, it's fine.

- Okay.

- He just, um...

Rate this script:3.3 / 7 votes

Woody Allen

Heywood "Woody" Allen is an American actor, comedian, filmmaker, and playwright, whose career spans more than six decades. more…

All Woody Allen scripts | Woody Allen Scripts

4 fans

Submitted on August 05, 2018

Discuss this script with the community:

0 Comments

    Translation

    Translate and read this script in other languages:

    Select another language:

    • - Select -
    • 简体中文 (Chinese - Simplified)
    • 繁體中文 (Chinese - Traditional)
    • Español (Spanish)
    • Esperanto (Esperanto)
    • 日本語 (Japanese)
    • Português (Portuguese)
    • Deutsch (German)
    • العربية (Arabic)
    • Français (French)
    • Русский (Russian)
    • ಕನ್ನಡ (Kannada)
    • 한국어 (Korean)
    • עברית (Hebrew)
    • Gaeilge (Irish)
    • Українська (Ukrainian)
    • اردو (Urdu)
    • Magyar (Hungarian)
    • मानक हिन्दी (Hindi)
    • Indonesia (Indonesian)
    • Italiano (Italian)
    • தமிழ் (Tamil)
    • Türkçe (Turkish)
    • తెలుగు (Telugu)
    • ภาษาไทย (Thai)
    • Tiếng Việt (Vietnamese)
    • Čeština (Czech)
    • Polski (Polish)
    • Bahasa Indonesia (Indonesian)
    • Românește (Romanian)
    • Nederlands (Dutch)
    • Ελληνικά (Greek)
    • Latinum (Latin)
    • Svenska (Swedish)
    • Dansk (Danish)
    • Suomi (Finnish)
    • فارسی (Persian)
    • ייִדיש (Yiddish)
    • հայերեն (Armenian)
    • Norsk (Norwegian)
    • English (English)

    Citation

    Use the citation below to add this screenplay to your bibliography:

    Style:MLAChicagoAPA

    "Irrational Man" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 19 Dec. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/irrational_man_10974>.

    We need you!

    Help us build the largest writers community and scripts collection on the web!

    Watch the movie trailer

    Irrational Man

    The Studio:

    ScreenWriting Tool

    Write your screenplay and focus on the story with many helpful features.


    Quiz

    Are you a screenwriting master?

    »
    What is the purpose of "scene headings" in a screenplay?
    A To provide dialogue for characters
    B To indicate the location and time of a scene
    C To outline the plot
    D To describe the character's actions