Irreplaceable You Page #8

---

And I realized, I've never really been

on my own, you know?

If I had a good day, tell Sam.

If I had a crappy day,

complain about it with Sam.

- Mm-hmm.

- [inhales]

[frustrated exhale]

You're going to want to gently, um,

pull the yarn back around

from... from front to back.

Maybe I missed out on something

being so bound up with him.

Maybe I missed out on a lot of things.

Maybe we're not supposed to be

so intensely bound up with one person...

- Okay, okay.

- Over such a long time anyway.

You know maybe life is about... about...

- Why... Why don't we untangle all this...

- [frustrated exhale]

and start...

Crocheting is not a metaphor!

I... I know. I'm... I...

- I was talking about needle work.

- I'm sorry.

You say it's a metaphor a lot.

I know I use it as a metaphor,

but I wasn't on this occasion.

Maybe you could do like a quote thing.

Where's Myron?

Where's Myron?

He...

He left us.

[metal clatters]

Anybody know what this is?

I think it's a metaphor

for you being a terrible crochet teacher.

[doorbell buzzing]

Hi. Uh, are you Estelle?

Yeah.

I'm Abbie.

Come inside.

They're all sitting shiva.

There's all kinds of food,

but me, I'm sticking with the Scotch.

Scotch?

Yes, please.

Thanks.

So...

what happened?

He'd been getting weaker

for a week or so.

Not eating, sleeping a lot of the time.

He was in pain,

but he didn't want to go to the hospital.

He wanted to be here at home,

just the two of us.

At the end, he looked at me

and smiled and said,

"I'll see you around."

And I know I will.

The last time I saw him,

he didn't mention anything.

I... I didn't know he was in pain.

- Why... Why wouldn't he tell me?

- Abbie.

It's not about you.

You know, Myron always said

you were a bit of a schmuck.

He did?

I thought we were friends.

Oh, you were.

He was friends with a lot of schmucks.

[laughs]

What else did he say?

Just that you got your head

so far up your ass

worrying about Sam

and what's gonna happen to him,

trying to control everything

and predict all the what ifs,

and you're missing out on the good part.

And what is that?

What is.

Do you want to meet the family?

Uh, thanks, but, uh...

I think I've got to go find Sam.

Sure.

You... have a lovely home.

But I agree with Myron on the couch.

[both laugh]

[piano music]

Hey.

- Abbie, I just... I-I...

- I have to...

- No, I want you to...

- No, wait. Let me.

[exhales]

I've had some bad luck recently.

Yeah, I know.

I thought if I planned

your whole future...

it wouldn't hurt so much

not to be a part of it.

But the truth is...

You'll be with whoever

you want to be with.

- No, I won't.

- Yes.

- No, I...

- Yes.

And... And... And I can't help it

if you lose your glasses

or your socks don't match.

I have to let you go.

No.

I'm letting you go.

- What are you doing?

- Abbie.

[clears throat]

For as long as I can remember,

I've wanted to spend forever with you.

And I... I know we don't have forever,

but the truth is, nobody does.

I love you now.

I love you now.

I... I, um...

Just... Give me your hand.

[laughs]

Marry me.

What?

You so wanted this ring for yourself.

[laughs]

- I did not!

- No?

- No!

- But it's your size.

[laughs]

So?

So.

So the cake.

Chocolate, hazelnut, or raspberry?

- Oh, no, you don't.

- Oh, yes.

- I do.

- [laughs]

[Sam] Look at that sun for us.

[Abbie] Mm-hmm. [laughs]

How do I look?

Like the most beautiful girl in the world.

The light of my entire life.

My baby.

Then let's take it.

- Okay.

- Okay.

- We found a dress.

- This is the one.

- This is the one.

- Okay.

- Okay.

- [laughs]

You're the boss.

[laughter]

Look, just FYI, this is not up to par

with my bachelor party standards, okay?

We should be rocking Vegas.

Well, this is more my speed.

That is very sad,

but that is actually true.

You're a lucky man.

Because you have me.

[laughter]

What do you think?

Too much?

Good.

So I was thinking,

we could put the bar over there

by the windows

and have the people sit here,

arrange the chairs,

and have the food at the table, of course.

And then speeches sort of happen here.

I'm trying to keep Benji from talking.

- Please God.

- Yeah.

And where will the dancing be?

Our first dance.

Well, I was thinking here.

It'll be tight, but...

you'll see.

It'll be great.

Show me now.

Come on.

Should we start with a fox-trot, maybe?

Or the merengue?

- I know, you think it's lame.

- Because it is lame.

- It's not lame.

- It's so lame.

You're really good at it. Right?

Turn a little.

[light music]

I know it's been so long

Since we saw each other last

I'm sure we'll find some way

To make the time pass

I really bit you.

[laughs]

Six stitches.

[laughter]

I can't believe you still have this.

Hey, Moon

I'll have it forever.

It's just you and me tonight

Everyone else is asleep

Hey, Moon

My old friend

Oh, hey, Moon

The night is coming to an end

Hey, Moon

Come back soon

Hey.

[gentle music]

[Jane] Champagne? It's Abbie's favorite.

Would you have something stronger?

A Scotch, perhaps?

Oh. Absolutely.

We have everything.

You know that Maine is the only state

with one syllable?

Did you know that one cow

can make 400 hamburgers?

[Benji] Do you know how many people

have the same birthday as you?

[Melanie] No, but did you know

that fish can't blink?

Did you know everyone

has a unique tongue print?

Thank you all for coming.

I mean, I know it's weird

that we're all here.

But hey...

we have all this food, and liquor,

and three really big cakes, so...

You know.

And I... I didn't want to be alone.

I... I couldn't be alone tonight.

I wasn't sure if I was gonna open this,

if I was ready,

but I don't have any words of my own

right now, so...

And I... I'm sure we...

we'd all love to hear from her.

I would anyway.

"Sam, full disclosure:

I'm starting to have

a pretty strong feeling

that I might not make it to the big day.

So, yeah, you're probably on your own.

Sorry about that.

I guess this really gives new meaning

to the term cold feet."

[laughs] "Too soon?"

Too soon.

"So, why'd I go ahead

with planning it anyway?

Well, mostly I thought, no matter what,

you're probably gonna need a party."

True.

"See, sometimes it's not so bad

to have someone plan for you a tiny bit."

[sighs]

"So, if you'll allow me,

just a few words of advice.

Mom.

- Please try to stop worrying."

- [Abbie] Please try to stop worrying.

Have a little fun once in a while.

And keep up with the support group.

Maybe there's someone there for you.

Benji, continue to help Sam with his game,

but please don't ever leave him in a bar

late at night again.

We all know how that ends.

Estelle, I'll say hi

to that schmuck of yours.

We'll be checking out the hawks

from above now.

To the last group

I ever wanted to be a member of.

Crocheting is a metaphor for life.

It's really hard.

And one last thing.

"And one last thing."

[Abbie] The most important thing

Rate this script:4.0 / 2 votes