Jackass Number Two Page #7

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I'll be okay.

Please, God, don't let there

be a Jackass Three.

Please, please, God, don't let there

be a Jackass Three.

I don't even like doing Two.

Hello, I'm Johnny Knoxville.

Welcome to India!

Can I get off his dick...

Way to go.

I don't like this at all!

Sorry, bro. I didn't see you there.

I was headed over to Produce.

You knocked out my tooth again!

Look at Rick!

He f***ing swallowed it?

Horse cum!

I'm not getting paid to be on camera,

you f***ing dick.

That was great.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, what have you got?

Marker.

Don't drop your sh*t.

Just act like it hurts, okay?

Wow. I actually feel energized after that.

Oh my God, look!

Point it at the cameraman!

Into the sink!

In the sink!

- In the sink!

- In the sink!

- Are you lubed up?

- Yeah!

Hey, they're ready to go.

Do you want to shoot it?

You all right, buddy?

I'm all right, man.

Water-based lubricants. Friend or foe?

You be the judge.

Okay, I can't breathe.

Can you take it off, please?

- Oh, is this your fruit?

- No.

Oh, these are beautiful!

They're so round and lush.

- How much is the oranges?

- $6.

Okay.

I accidentally cut myself.

I need a doctor, dude.

Doctor!

- We're supposed to catch these?

- Yeah!

You are f***ing kidding!

Oh, my God!

Don't do that.

The snake is attracted to the heat.

Yeah, we got to get the mousey warm

for the snake.

But not too warm!

- Look at his face.

- He has a big raspberry.

A couple of them.

Sh*t!

What the f*** happened?

- Medic!

- Medic!

Someone said cut.

What's up, Bam?

I hate the fact that I had to f***ing

hang out with alligators

and f***ing cobras.

I have d*cks branded on my ass...

Everything f***ing sucks.

Like, everybody's

just f-ing with me today.

And my Misfits sock.

It's not even funny anymore.

I want to go home.

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